There's Something About Her
by NovemberDoll
Summary: When her entire life is shattered by a scandal involving her and the school's most notorious playboy, she comes back after a year posed as someone else. It was the perfect disguise- until he sees right through her ruse. How far is he willing to go to keep her? Sometimes, things are not always what they seem to be.
1. Intoxicated

_**A/N:**_ This will be a toned-down version of the original I have written. PM me and I will reply for the fuller version if you want. Nothing explicit, but this chapter will be less detailed. Only for this chapter, though, as I will try to make their next encounters... I don't know... Haha.. If Im not able to control myself I might just put this in a (MM) account just because. I will let you guys know when it comes to that. But this won't be a dark fic. I'm not talented enough. ;( Anyway I'm wrapping up "My HS Life", this shall be the more dramatic counterpart.

* * *

 _ **Impaired Judgment**_

* * *

Her world teetered. Kagome had to blink many times and she squinted through her thick glasses. Still the images before her seemed to separate into double, and the wooden floor gave way as she made each step. It was a miracle she had reached the top of the stairs without slipping. She was looking for an empty bathroom, she could only hold her nausea for so long.

The one downstairs had a fox-youkai and water-nymph getting it on.

She dry-heaved. Kagome's thoughts drifted to the safety and security of their shrine. She should have listened to her mother's warnings about choosing her friends, but how was an innocent shrine maiden like her able to know? The moment she stepped out of the train into the bustling metropolis of Tokyo, she was starstruck. By the buildings, the many people, the lifestyle. It was so different, so... _dazzling_ it left her reeling. Her uncle had laughed at her dazed expression at that time.

And her first day as a high school freshman was something she would rather forget. Sneers and heckles erupted the moment she came in the room. Thick-rimmed glasses, braided updo, long sleeves and ankle-length skirt. It wouldn't have been that bad. But for some reason they hated her. It was only when a group of wolf-youkai befriended her did the first few weeks seem tolerable. But as the school year dragged on, it seemed that even within their circle, she was still the target of their jokes and ridicule.

And here she was in the middle of the school year, in one of their "acquaintance's" house party, drunk as a mule.

" _I don't drink," Kagome tried to push the glass away from her face. But Mei, one of her wolf-youkai 'friends', was persistent._

" _Oh come on, seriously? It's just juice, Kagome! No one gets drunk by juice!" Mei shoved the glass in front of her face again, and the naive fool hesitantly took the glass from her._

" _Are you sure?"_

 _The wolf-youkai snickered as Kagome took a generous gulp._

She was a lightweight. Her traditional family trained her to resemble purity. Never in her life had she even a sip of alcohol, and that vodka-laced punch almost knocked her out.

Kagome cursed herself as the world started spinning around her.

Damn it. She had literally befriended a _pack of wolves_. Her hands settled on a door, and she trustingly leaned on it.

But it was open, and she stumbled right in, all fours on the carpet like the pathetic drunk that she was.

"G-gomen nasai-" she stuttered, barely able to stand up. Her knees wobbled, and she lifted her head to face the person that stood before her. She was still seeing double, but she could recognize that outline even with her eyes closed.

Sesshomaru Taisho.

The most popular boy in school. He was the eldest of the Taisho siblings, heir to the business magnate Touga Taisho. She knew because his father was one of the main sponsors of their shrine festivals, and the brothers, since their childhood, were somehow acquainted with the shrine.

With the shrine. Not with her. Because there was a big difference with the idea.

 _They_ barely knew _her_.

"Are you my challenge?" he eyed her suspiciously, and Kagome shook her head, confused. She could barely add 1 plus 1 at this point, all she wanted to do was sleep. In her double vision she could make out the red flush on his cheeks, was he also intoxicated?

"I... have to...I think.. Shess...sesshoma...ru, Senpai- nice meeting you," _Not as intoxicated as you, idiot._ She mentally berated herself. _You could barely even form a decent sentence._

"Are you drunk?" She could almost hear the amused tone he held, and his sardonic laughter made her grimace. "They had to inebriate you _that_ much in order to bring you up here?"

Sesshomaru picked up a small shot glass and strode towards the door. After closing it, he knelt before her and forced her chin up with firm hands. "To tell you honestly I didn't expect you to come in the door. They put up quite a challenge this time, those damn 'friends' of mine." He suddenly crooned, and warning bells rang in Kagome's head.

"Don't be shy." He said with a fanged smirk. "Here, loosen up." with one swift tilt he slipped the bitter liquid in her mouth, and the poor girl almost choked at the sudden action. Her swallow reflex kicked in, and it was only then that she realized when it burned in her throat what it was.

Straight Vodka.

Her eyes glazed over. She swore she saw her soul leave her body. Now she was in trouble.

She was too inebriated to wipe off the leaking alcohol that dripped from her mouth.

She heard him unbuckle his belt. "Shrine girl," he suddenly said, and Kagome dumbly tilted her head up and squinted, unsure of what was before her. Her vision was extremely blurry.

She reached out and touched something hard and throbbing _._

Her spinning vision finally came to and she realized she was holding his very large, very aroused staff _._

Unfortunately for her, the alcohol had already obliterated any common sense. " _Ah, so this is what it_ _looks like,_ " she thought, unwittingly stroking the entire length with her small hands.

"Very good, shrine girl." Sesshomaru leaned his head back . "Perfect, just perfect."

 _Wrong! Very Wrong!_ Something screamed from the back of her mind, but she pushed it away. Something hot was starting to form deep inside, and it felt _exciting._

"Are you aw...al...awlright?" Kagome asked. His eyes were closed and his breath was in little bursts of gasps, she wondered if it hurt because he looked as if he were in pain. In her dumb drunk mind she wanted to help. He only hummed in response.

The large appendage twitched.

"Shit," she heard Sesshomaru curse through clenched teeth. His hand halted her own, and golden eyes locked in her blue ones. "Do you know what would make me feel really good, shrine girl?"

Kagome halted, and he hovered closer.

"Lick it, take it in your mouth and suck hard."

She released the hold to his member. "I... don't- if that would fit, if that would even," She managed pathetically, but her judgment had been possessed by the spirit of vodka.

She wanted to help, right?

Kagome heard him hiss when her lips hesitantly grazed his throbbing head.

She flicked her tongue at the tip and, and from that she leaned over to run it through his entire length.

She did not notice him shift and take out something from his pocket, and he held it in front of him. "Go ahead," he said through clenched teeth, and his free hand fisted her hair.

She slowly took him in.

"Deeper," he said, and Kagome complied, confused in the back of her mind as to how could this possibly make someone feel good, when her jaw felt so strained. She wrapped a hand on the base and took his enormous length in, moving up and down. There was a curious salty taste as she advanced her mouth. She felt him pulse. He was starting to moan as if in great pain, and Kagome noticed that the faster and firmer she took him in, the more pained his grunts grew.

She started gagging when his length hit her throat.

She felt him tremble. Was she doing it right, then? He suddenly thrusted. He pulled away again and shoved back in, and Kagome held on to him as the rhythm became faster and more desperate. "Deeper," he snarled, "ah, yes... yes! deeper...Kagome-"

The sudden mention of her name caused Kagome to feel a curious warmth pool on her own nether regions and she moaned, the vibrations on her throat causing his muscles to spasm.

Suddenly something spilled into her mouth, filling her sore cavern.

An audible pop escaped her mouth as he pulled out, and she swallowed absently.

She suddenly heard the InuYoukai growl. What she did not see was his eyes had already bled in red.

Her world turned upside down as she was roughly pushed to her back. He hovered above her, imprisoning her form between his arms. With one swift shove he managed to flip her prone, and he hiked her skirt up.

Kagome felt a cold draft pass on her exposed behind, the thin material of her panties serving no purpose.

Sesshomaru was trying to relieve the massive hard-on he had somehow gained instantly again. He lurched forward and just as his other hand started to push her panties aside, a soft sniffling reached his ears.

The scent of salty tears filled his nose, and instantly his red eyes faded back to gold. "Shrine Girl," he managed, biting back the moment, struggling to zipper his painful erection back in his pants. Before he could even get back to her she had already sat up, hiccuping and wiping the tears from her face.

"Somehow, I," she started, struggling to form whatever she was trying to say. She leaned forward and braced her palms on his chest-

And puked.

She puked her guts out, right on his shirt, the horrible sound of her tortured retching bouncing on the walls. The foul taste of her bile heightened her nausea again and she puked some more.

When it was all over, she managed to lift her head up and give the dumbfounded youkai a stupid excuse. "Uh...I don't feel well-"

The stink of her vomit shamelessly started to fill the room.

The doors suddenly burst open, and in strode another second-year, Naraku. "Hey Sessh, we brought you your challenge-" Brown eyes flew wide open at the sight before him.

The shrine girl's hair looked absolutely disheveled, her glasses askew, two buttons on her blouse open, and her knee-length skirt hiked up to her thighs. She was straddling a fully-clothed but shocked Sesshomaru-

who was soaked in her puke.

"Oh my Gosh?!" A female voice exclaimed, and numerous gasps erupted from behind them. Kagome's world started spinning again, unable to even comprehend how many people were really in the room because of her doubling vision. All she knew was that they had an entire audience.

"I have GOT to instagram this." Another voice expressed, and before Kagome could even blink, a camera flash assaulted her eyes, and the darkness that followed was of her losing her consciousness.


	2. Shattered

_**A/N:**_ Just to give you guys a general overview of the story, this will not be purely smut (awww, sorry!), but concentrated on angst. After our first 3 introductory chaps, it will be divided into two parts: There's Something About Him, and There's Something About Her. We will shift through three perspectives: Kagome's, Sesshomaru's bestfriend Naraku, and the last, Sesshomaru's.

Thanks. :)

* * *

 _ **Shattered**_

* * *

She stole a glance at her side: there it was again. The students would fall into silence, leaning on to each other in whispers, darting secret glances her way. She would have been used to it, she was not as trendy or as updated in clothing, but today was different.

They used to look at her with pity, but now, it was all with disgust.

Perhaps she was too paranoid? She heard a giggle from behind her, and it took all her self-control to not search for the source.

The school jocks erupted into a mocking howl as she passed by their table. She felt unwanted heat rise to her cheeks. What was this... _shame_ she was feeling?

 _What happened last night?_

She sat on her usual table, with her so-called youkai friends, but they stood up to leave. "Where are you going?" she hesitantly asked, clutching the carton of milk on her hands tightly from her tension. One of her 'friends' turned to her and shrugged.

"Somewhere." she answered, and Kagome would have stood there pondering when the other youkai friend threw in secretly: "slut."

Her eyes grew wide, and she rushed to the girl, pulling her by the arm. "What did you call me?" Kagome flared in anger, and the girl seemed to shrink under her glare. Students from the surrounding lunch tables flocked to see the commotion. The shrine girl's milk pooled on the floor.

Realizing the scene she was creating, Kagome desperately tried to calm herself, but she couldn't. She was confused, and angry, and alone- "what did you call me," she repeated in a much-restrained tone.

The girl, finally overcoming her shock, looked up at her and smirked. "You very well know what I am talking about, _'innocent one.'"_ she made sure she dragged the last word out, and snickers erupted from her unwanted audience.

Kagome's grip on the girl weakened.

"You know you can never seduce Sesshomaru-sama with that innocent play of yours, so you just had to take off your mask, huh?"

Kagome pulled away, reeling from confusion. She looked around her helplessly; they were looking back with the same faces: disgusted, mocking, sneering. At that moment, she felt as if the school caved in on her, and she couldn't breathe.

She was trapped in a dark, empty well, and she couldn't get out.

"Well, 'shrine maiden'," her friend continued, "your plan backfired. Didn't expect that, huh?"

"What are you talking about?" Kagome's eyes burned with inevitable tears. She will not cry.

 _Not here._

 _Not in front of them._

"But he was not fooled. Even if you revealed to him the _whore_ you really are, taking your shirt off and making the first moves, you ended up embarrassing yourself in front of him,"

Laughter erupted from the crowd, and instantly Kagome's blazing courage recoiled. She cowered, feeling as if her skin melted, exposing her bones, exposing her bare soul.

And she felt so fucking uncomfortable.

Her stomach cringed, she felt so sick from shame. She searched blindly among the crowd for a familiar face to rescue her, her desperate gaze flicking from one judgemental face to another, all the while backing away.

The whispering, the secret glances-

" _Bitch._ " She ended, and Kagome shook her head, tears finally spilling out of her eyes. She backed away into someone firm, and she spun around. It was one of the high school jocks, grabbing her wrist and pulled her close.

"Hey shrine maiden, care to ride me?" he mocked, and Kagome pulled away, horrified. Grabbing her books, she ran away from the judging crowd, away from the horrible whispering.

"I don't care if you puke on me!" the jock called after her, and they laughed at her confused expense. Kagome was crestfallen. Her vision was obscured from her fogged up glasses, bumping into strangers as she sobbed.

 _What happened? Kami, what happened?_

She reached her locker and opened it, and a slew of pictures fell on the floor, pooling at her feet. With a hand covering her mouth to stifle her moans, she bent down to pick one up, and she froze.

The school prince was straddled by an unknown girl, brown vile all over his shirt. The girl had her hands on his buttons, and his own hand was on her shoulder as if pushing the girl away.

 _No..._

she paled as she stared at the unrecognizable girl above him.

Hair disheveled, eyes half-closed and pushing him- forcing him- down, was _her._ Her blouse was open, falling off one shoulder revealing her white bra strap, and her skirt was hiked so far up the hem of her panties were showing.

 _This isn't me..._

Her glasses were askew, her cheeks blushing heavily as her body arched, and her blue eyes- her eyes-

Was looking back at the camera, full and stunned.

Drops of her tears fell on the photo, and she whimpered, as the images of last night rushed into her like a giant wave. It swallowed her whole- she remembered everything now, from her stupid complacency when she accepted the drink, how she tumbled into the room with the Taisho heir in it, and her eyes widened in panic, as she remembered the smell of alcohol in his breath,

and how he unzipped his pants-

her hands shook as she dug through the pictures like a madwoman, the disgusting memory of her giving head, swallowing mouthfuls of his seed, was relentless and unforgiving.

 _What have I done?_

She did not see any evidence of it. Was it just a hallucination, from the poisons of alcohol?

 _But the pictures,_

It was a mistake. A mistake on both their parts- she was drunk, _he_ was drunk, it should have never happened!

 _But why am I the one being slut-shamed?_ Kagome finally succumbed to her tears. Her overwhelmed form crumbled into the pressure, and her knees gave way. What would her family say if they found out? Her dear mother, who went against her father's orders and sent her to school _here?_

 _I'm sorry... Mama, I'm sorry..._

Kagome supported her other hand against her mouth, her sobs growing louder in regret and immense confusion. Someone stirred from before her, and she raised her blurry gaze to the figure.

Tall, raven-haired Naraku, Sesshomaru Taisho's best friend.

His eyes were wide, not expecting to see her as she was on the floor, her scandalized pictures scattered all around her. "Shrine girl," he managed, "Sesshomaru has been looking for you,"

Kagome reeled, fear swallowing her eyes.

The school prince- she couldn't imagine the level of rage that was brewing in him. She had humiliated his image significantly, what was he going to do to her?!

Naraku stepped forward, "He wants to talk to you. Right now, if possible,"

Kagome shook her head and bolted up, dashing past him as fast as her legs can carry her. She thought she heard Naraku run after her, so she slid past the gym, into an empty locker, and shut herself in.

She held her breath as Naraku's form swept past the lockers, her tears silently streaking down her cheeks, unable to stop no matter how hard she tried.

The sophomore's smartphone rang. "Kagura?" he answered, "No luck. She slipped past me." He paused as the other line talked, and Kagome waited for what seemed like an eternity when he finally spoke. "Fine. But that son of a bitch won't be pleased when he finds out."

His figure finally left the gym,

and seeing that she was alone, Kagome brought her knees to her chest,

curling into herself, and cried her broken heart out.

* * *

It was late in the afternoon when Kagome arrived in their shrine, and she managed up until the last of the thousand steps in exhaustion. She went straight to the train station, straight home, not even bothering to stop by her uncle's house in Tokyo proper.

The sight gave her some comfort- her middle-schooler brother Souta was sitting under the Goshinboku.

He was looking at something in his smartphone, and it seemed that whatever he was watching, it had immersed all of his attention. His brows met with a concentrated frown. So absorbed was he that he did not notice Kagome walk up to him. "No school today?" she smiled, and Souta looked up, his eyes widened.

"Onee-san," Souta paled, immediately hiding his phone from her. He had an odd expression on his face, and a sinking feeling started to form inside Kagome's gut. A painful knot began to develop in her throat-

"What are you looking at?" she faked a smile, but her forced cheeriness was wavering when Souta inched back,

"N-nothing, onee-san. Just my facebook feed." he stood up and straightened himself. He attempted to walk away, but Kagome grabbed his wrist.

"May I see?" she said, her blue eyes darkening. Souta shook his head as he tried to pull away, but she held fast.

"It doesn't concern you, Onee-san," he answered, looking away.

"Let me see, Souta," Kagome tipped and reached out for his pocket and got hold of his phone, but her brother quickly snatched it away.

"No," he retorted, but she twisted his arm awkwardly in attempts to pry it off him.

"Let me see!" she screamed, this time, inevitable tears running down her cheeks. His shocked brother glared at her and hesitatingly handed the phone.

She swiped down.

A tagged picture of her, _the_ picture, and underneath someone so blatantly captioned:

 _Come to Higurashi Shrine. We have excellent service._

Kagome scrolled through the comments, from friends, and complete strangers, feeling the knot in her stomach tighten-

-Hey, Souta, how much do you charge for such service?-

-Isn't that the plain shrine girl from #Takahashi High?-

-Your sister is hot! Introduce her to us, we'll sure have a good time,-

-My Poor Sesshomaru! How dare she! #LetsStandAgainstSluts

-Vomit we can clean up easily. But me cumming over her all night? She'll be in for a sticky situation!-

Kagome felt helpless... and very sick. She closed her eyes, wishing all of this were just a nightmare.

"I have already flagged this as inappropriate, and reported to the moderators." Souta murmured, ''But your pic, its scattered all over the internet, in snapchat, in twitter..." he looked up to Kagome, who had been quiet the whole time. "I'm sorry, Sis."

Quietly, the crying girl shook her head slowly, "it's not your fault," she whispered as she headed to their house. She could already hear her mother sobbing, and the voice of her strict father raised.

"Why did you have to send her to school there, of all places?!" she could hear him curse. She opened the door, and all eyes fell on her. Her mother was on the floor with a red mark on her cheek, and her father, out of rage, strode towards her and pulled Kagome by the hair, slamming her on the wooden wall.

Kagome slid down the floor, unable to breathe properly from the sobs that wracked her body.

"I didn't raise you to be a whore!" her father lashed out, and the girl couldn't do anything but gather her bruised body and knelt, prostrating before him.

"I'm sorry," she cried out desperately, her regret spilling out, but it was useless. Her father took hold of their antique vase and flung it on the wall, the glass shattering into a thousand crystal pieces.

"How utterly shameful, and you dragged our family name down with you!"

"Please," he mother pleaded, "she's too young-" she crawled towards her daughter and sheltered her in a protective embrace. Kagome shook her head.

"It's my fault," she sobbed, "It's my fault..."

Her father closed the gap between them and raised his hand to strike- when he was suddenly pulled away by a smaller form.

Souta, their young, middle-schooler Souta, had launched himself to his father in attempts to halt his abuse. He was shoved away in one push, and his small form crashed into the wall.

Kagome could only whimper. Her life,

her family,

was crumbling before her very eyes... and at that moment, she felt helpless, utterly helpless.

A heavy silence fell into the room, and her father finally stirred.

There were tears in his eyes as he looked at Kagome, and the girl looked away, ashamed.

How could she... how dare she... make her mother and father cry?

"I love you, Kagome... the moment I laid eyes on you when you came out of your mother's womb, even up to this point," he sank on the chair, finally weakened, his abhorrent rage eating up his conscience. "And I only wanted to protect you... but you always end up breaking my heart up to ridiculous levels."

He breathed. "I'm sending you away from here," he said, "to your cousin Kikyo in Shibuya."

"Kyo," her mother pressed, "don't you think it would make things worse-"

"Don't mess up your life there." he shook his head, refusing to be cut. "You are leaving now. The longer you stay here, the more damage you will cause."

She nodded her head absently. "Yes, Otou-san."

Her father hung his head and cried.

Her mother hugged her tight, her brother crawled towards her and leaned his head on hers.

Shattered, she thought.

 _My whole life, shattered._


	3. Skeletons in the Closet

_**Skeleton in the Closet**_

* * *

Kagome stared at her reflection in the mirror. The girl blinked as she held her glasses up to her eyes, then down. She swore it had only been a year when she was practically blind without them. And now, as she looked through the thick lens, she realized she did not need it: her vision was completely normal. Her constant headaches and convulsions that started as she graduated in middle school, gone.

She leaned forward, touching the bruise-like birthmark that lay where her shoulder and neck connected. Through the years it was fading, and now, it was almost erased.

 _It's... odd._

A sharp knock on the bathroom door startled her, and she rolled her eyes as she opened her little pouch. "I'll be out in a second!" she said, getting back to her original task. She took out some lip gloss and swiped it on her lips, taking out her compact and brush and applied her pressed powder, making sure her face stayed matte in the humid summer day.

As she combed through her unbound hair with her fingers, her thoughts brought her back to the year that had passed. Nothing much happened in Shibuya except for the subtle changes to her health, and of course, being with Kikyo, her dear cousin, who gave her enough knowledge to dress to pass as 'normal,' even teaching her how to use make-up and how to fix her hair. Her cousin, although a shrine maiden like her, was good at those things.

Too bad Kikyo was not there with her three months ago, during her parent's funeral.

Her strict father, and her poor, submissive mother.

They died in a car crash on their way to visit her at Shibuya.

And she felt guilty for feeling this numb, not even shedding a tear for her father during the service.

The knocking on the door persisted, and the girl gave out a sigh. She opened the door, and the figure of a glaring Souta greeted her.

She only glared back.

"Are you all done?" he started, "because I'm late for my first day in high school."

"Give me a minute more," Kagome answered. "I still have to put on some concealer." She held her glare as her brother's eyes widened in horror. Unable to contain herself, the girl burst out laughing. She reached over and ruffled his hair playfully. "I'm just kidding,"

Souta huffed in frustration, looking away. "Geez, who are you and what did you do to my sister?!"

Gathering him into a hug, Kagome smiled. "She's still here. She hasn't gone anywhere."

After her parent's death, she dared to come back to Tokyo. She dared to enroll in the very school thatripped her to pieces, going under a different name. She will be Kaguya Higurashi, Kagome's cousin from Shibuya. She knew she could pull it off, after all, what was high school for her than a fake set of people with fake faces and personalities?

She would dare because she was stronger after all that had happened. Her brother needed her by her side, and she did not want him to transition into life without any parents.

She would dare for him, the only real family she had left.

* * *

"Youkai mating is a complicated topic," the teacher explained, "the higher the level of intelligence, the more complex it gets."

Kagome sighed as she rested her cheek on her hand, her gaze drifting outside the window. The cool breeze hit her face, and she stared at the endless blue sky, filtering the teacher's lecture out. There was something in summer that gave her a sense of immense warmth and comfort. She watched the green leaves of the trees sway with the gentle wind.

She shifted. It was her second week at school, and she was, honestly, surprised.

No one had recognized her.

She had expected that, now that her glasses were gone and she let her hair down.

What surprised her was that everything was so different. On her first day, she even thought she had stepped in the wrong school. They had mandated a uniform for all the students to wear after the first week, so she had no problems in searching for an outfit.

And the people, they were different. Kagome secretly scanned her eyes across the classroom. She knew some faces, but the familiar ones she so hated, her circle of wolf-youkai friends, were _gone_.

The jocks that the school so very treasured, even those judgemental faces that looked back at her a year ago at the cafeteria, they disappeared.

As if they vanished into thin air.

 _"Expelled, probably. I don't know. Nobody knows" said a classmate, shrugging her shoulders. "a mass of people, mostly the popular group, disappeared by the end of the school year."_

 _"Well, it's a good thing. I never really liked them."_

" _Yeah. Such a bunch of meanies, Kaguya. Good thing you didn't get to meet them."_

"Youkai feel emotions differently from humans," the teacher's voice drifted into her hearing, "they may look superior, but they are dominated by their instincts. For them it is raw and unfiltered. Their behavior highly depends on the level of their intelligence. For humans, think of your emotions, and multiply it by ten. Now it is up to their logic to control these emotions. That is why you see others ruder because they cannot control their baser instincts, and the cold and seemingly distant ones-

they have a more superior... mask, to those unfiltered, intense emotions."

A classmate raised her hand, "Is that why Tanaka-san is such a loudmouth?" he pointed to a bull-youkai beside him, and 'Tanaka' retaliated, punching his shoulder.

"Hey, before you start making stupid comparisons, look at yourself first, pea-brain." The class burst out laughing. Kagome rolled her eyes, bored. She brought her gaze back outside, to the trees that were swaying in the wind, green leaves dancing around.

"A male youkai can choose his mate as late as his old age." The teacher continued. "Others choose their mates as early as childhood. This is a rare trait, though, and it is seen in more powerful males. That is why you can see this happening commonly in _Daiyoukais_."

A classmate sitting before her leaned over to her seatmate and dropped her voice to a low whisper. "I wouldn't mind being chosen by a daiyoukai," she whispered, and her seatmate giggled. "I heard Naraku-senpai chose his mate Kagura when they were still in middle school."

Kagome's eyes widened subtly, upon hearing the name. It had been so long since she heard it said, and her heart raced a little bit faster. _He is still here, in the school. That would only mean..._

"Even if some are arranged into marriage, once the male had his choice, there is no hindering him from his chosen one. Inu-youkais, most especially, are notorious for this kind of loyalty. There are some cases of them that when their chosen one dies, they die shortly after. Some even take their own life, unable to handle the depression."

"Hey, Sesshomaru-sama of Fourth-year A is an inu... and a daiyoukai!" her classmate whispered, and her seatmate straightened, giddy.

"Oh my gosh... go for it, Natsumi! You'll hit the jackpot with him!"

Kagome withdrew from her eavesdropping, thoroughly disinterested. The mere mention of his name made her skin crawl, and she pulled away.

 _So he is still here._

The bell rang for lunch, and the girl with blue eyes gathered her books and bag and headed straight outside, her thoughts to herself. She would keep herself as low-profile as possible. He only had one year more, and then he will graduate, and he would be out of this school, out of her sight.

* * *

Kagome stepped back as she stared at the sign posted on the gym door.

"Taekwondo Team Auditions 12pm-1pm" it said, and the girl stepped inside. A crowd of people had gathered at the center, onlookers noisily cheering on the participants, and the girl, trying to drown out the noise of the crowd, walked past them and went straight to the female restroom with her heavy bag in tow.

When she emerged she was already clad in a dobok, her belt wound tightly around her small waist. She bound her hair up into a tight ponytail and exited the bathroom, beelining towards an empty locker where she shoved her bag with her uniform inside. She shut the locker door and paused, her hands lingering on the metal number plate that was bolted to the front.

A year ago she was inside this very locker, crying her heart out as she hid from Naraku when the scandal happened.

Kagome closed the door and headed to the registration area. It was clear that the ushers were already members of the team, and one of them raised his brow when Kagome approached with her black belt around her waist. "Okay, even with _that_ you still have to go through the audition." he shook his head, handing her a paper. "Name and contact info."

Kagome rolled her eyes as she bent down and scribbled her information down. "Of course I would go through." She pushed the paper to the red-belter, "If you don't test me then I'd rather not join this club." she smirked as he tried to read her name.

"Higu...rashi. Higurashi Kaguya?" he clarified, and she nodded. He tucked the paper into the file and leaned on his chair, arms crossed in front of him, annoyed by her grin. "You're too confident. Aren't you a bit nervous? Our team swept the Taekwondo Nationals last year, and our captain was champion in the summer and winter open- National and _International_."

Kagome shrugged, refusing to be intimidated. She was done being pushed under the bridge. "Hit me with your best shot."

The red-belter chuckled. "Alright then. We'll let the captain himself decide."

"Decide on what?" a newcomer alluded from behind her, and Kagome instantly froze. She knew that voice. She could never forget it, even with her eyes closed.

"Sesshomaru-sama, we have a hopeful here who wishes to be auditioned by you."

"Who is she?" he said. Kagome shut her eyes closed, mentally cursing herself for such bad luck. _Him, of all people._

"Higurashi Kaguya," the student answered, and there was a long pause.

"Higurashi Kaguya?" Sesshomaru echoed, his voice suddenly different. "How are you related to Kagome?"

The girl opened her eyes, steeling herself from the utter revulsion consuming her being. How dare he say her name as if he knew her. A mask of fake cheerfulness overtook her face, and she tried to quell her shaking breath. "She is my cousin," she answered.

A hand, his hand, rested on the small of her shoulder, and she almost jumped at the contact.

She felt a sudden surge of flame burn from where he touched, and she instantly knew where it came from. _Her hatred._

"Where is she?" he said, his grip on her shoulder oddly tight. He was forcing her to turn her to him, dare she say, _desperately._ "Your cousin Kagome, where is she?" he repeated, and Kagome took a deep intake of breath. She turned to him.

Their gazes connected, and his golden eyes widened.

Kagome willed herself not to pale. Did he recognize her? But this was not the time to falter. Her knees were weak yet her resolve was firm. She smiled at him, so very sweetly. "Far away from here, away from strangers who destroy people's lives just to have their fun."

With a confident stride, she brushed past him, and she would have ran but she heard the taekwondo team announce his name in the overhead pager. Seeing that he was not following, Kagome dashed to her locker, grabbed her bag and bolted out of the gym.

 _Stupid Kagome, you just gave yourself away! Stupid, stupid!_

She was distracted for the rest of the day, but the girl tried with all her learned strength not to panic. Kagome had her share of sleepless nights, crying herself to sleep from the immense shame she was subjected to.

There was no way in the seven hells she would subject herself to such torture, ever again.

* * *

The rest of the day was uneventful, and she breathed a sigh of relief. It looked like he did not recognize her because no one was hounding the door when the bell rang for dismissal. The students had already trickled out, and Kagome, being voted as class representative, had just finished piling the papers and arranging them to submit to the teacher tomorrow.

She chuckled at the irony. When she was covered up with her thick glasses and country clothing, no one even bothered to look her way. Now that she was "pretty" to their standards, they were clamoring for her attention.

 _Such superficial people._

The girl exited the room, her stack of papers in tow. She started towards the school corridors when someone shifted from behind.

"Kagome," a familiar voice said, and the girl's hold to her papers loosened. The stack spilled from her hands, leaving an unorganized mess on the floor. Slowly, stiffly, Kagome turned around.

White hair and golden eyes.

The school prince was leaning on the wall by the doorway, his arms casually crossed in front of his chest. "You came back," he said, and Kagome forced herself to snap from shock.

She donned her overly cheerful mask as she knelt to pick the pathetic mess up. "I'm sorry, but you must have mistaken me for someone else," she said, hurriedly gathering her documents. A firm grip on her wrist stopped her movement and she raised her gaze.

He was down on one knee himself, in the middle of the mess of papers.

"What are you talking about?" he said, grabbing her other wrist and dragged her closer to him. Her blue eyes took a deeper shade, her entire being swallowed by one emotion:

Fear.

His golden eyes flew open, upon seeing that raw emotion thrown directly at him.

His hands fell limply to his sides, and she took the chance to pull away, not even bothering to gather the rest of her things. "I don't know you," she asserted, and his jaw visibly clenched, she could see a vein throbbing at the side of his neck in constrained rage.

"Kagome," he repeated with a fanged snarl, and she looked away, standing up and straightening her uniform.

"I'm not her." She declared. "You're crazy." She stood up to leave and had already walked two paces away when a sound echoed in the empty hallways, and she froze, halting dead in her tracks.

The sound of moaning, _her moaning,_ and a male grunt interspersed in between.

Tears instantly streaked down her cheeks. She was paralyzed.

" _ **Deeper," Sesshomaru's voice ghosted, "Ah, yes... yes! Deeper... Kagome,"**_ She spun around, her eyes wide and vulnerable as she watched him hold the phone in his hand.

 _You..._

Her shoulders slumped, and her knees, already weakened, gave way. She sank on the floor, her tears spilling from her eyes. The video continued playing, the repulsive sounds broadcasted in the lonely hallway. She thought she had only moaned once. She did not recall moaning as much.

But she did and she was, her moans were more frequent than his grunts, bouncing off the walls of the open corridors.

 _How dare you..._

Her whole body trembled. At that moment, all her strength, the fortress that she built the entire year had collapsed. "What do you want from me?" she whispered, not even looking at him, her blue eyes had lost focus, staring into the empty space behind him. The taekwondo captain leaned forward and he held her in a very intimate embrace.

 _I hate you,_

her body involuntary shook at the contact, the hairs on her skin standing. "Kagome," his tone was oddly gentle, and she felt nauseous, so fucking nauseous.

 _With the very fibers of my soul... I hate you..._

The tears would not stop, as he pressed her closer to him, "Six days from now will be summer solstice." Sesshomaru started, and he rubbed his cheek on hers, so very gently, "Bed with me." he purred. "Bed with me this coming full moon," he pulled away, "You will not regret it. I'll make you the happiest woman in the world, Kagome. I'll give you everything you want..."

The youkai dared to press his lips to her unresponsive ones, and she had not stopped crying, even as the hands that cupped her face had tried to wipe the tears away. He trailed gentle kisses on her forehead, down to her jaw, as he gravitated on her lips again. Kagome closed her eyes, not wanting to see his face so close to hers, wishing all of this was just a bad dream. But the rough prod of his tongue in her mouth reminded her that this was real, and her moans from the recording, echoing in the hallways was continuously playing on a loop, the endless torture reminding her of the consequences if she would say no.

He was threatening her with the sick, disgusting video.

She bit his tongue out of anger, but the youkai had probably seen it as a response. His kisses grew rougher, and he yanked her hair so that her head could tilt up and he could go deeper. With his tongue invading her in that one-sided, open-mouthed kiss, he did one thing that she had found very strange: he held her hands on his, making her blindly feel his hair, guiding it to explore the outline of his face: of his eyes, his nose, his jawline.

He pressed her hands to his lips and he kissed it, pulling away. He looked into her eyes and she saw it, that strange emotion she had denied she had seen when their eyes met in the gym:

 _Despair._

"I'll do anything you want," he madly whispered, "Just be my mate, Kagome... please... anything you want." and he crushed her in his arms.

Kagome was silent the whole time.

 _Pathetic. You are just..._

 _pathetic._

Since when had he been this desperate?

She remembered how they first officially "met," as she would only see him from afar in his visits to their shrine. It was her first day as a freshman in this wretched school, and the cherry trees by the brick road to the gates were blooming. She stopped and paused to watch.

A sudden pain stabbed in her head, and she cursed at the timing. These headaches, they usually lead to something more severe, and she lurched, unable to hold her knees. She sank on the grass and started convulsing.

When she fell, in between her throbbing head and blurring vision, she saw an outline that she could never mistaken. He was standing right in front of her, and as Kagome grimaced in pain she held her hand out to him, seeking comfort, begging for help.

He only looked back at her with wide eyes, and he looked utterly stunned.

Slowly he backed out and retreated- he walked away fast as he can without ever looking behind him,

leaving her alone to suffer under the abnormally bright sunlight and fall of cherry blossoms around.

 _Now that I am socially acceptable, you dare to claim me?_

He avoided her like the plague ever since that meeting, and the only contact she had with him after that was in the middle of the school year when that sickening party happened. The flames of her hatred blazed deep inside, heating her entire body, her blood boiling over the sensation of his body so close to hers.

 _With every fiber of my soul... I hate you. Sesshomaru Taisho..._

 _I hate you._

He leaned his head on hers. Kagome was still looking away. "Yes," she said emptily, and he sighed as he kissed her forehead.

"I'm so happy," He murmured, kissing her lips, his thumb caressing that tender, sensitive spot where her neck connected to her shoulder. He engulfed her in a possessive embrace, and she forced herself to stop crying, the look on her eyes suddenly hardening.

If he was this desperate, then she will let him be.

She will torture him during those five days with her indifference, and on the sixth day, before the full moon rises,

she will disappear.

Souta will understand, and wherever she will go, she was confident that her brother would keep her location a secret.

Before the sixth day ends she will leave Sesshomaru without any word, without any trace.

For an Inu like him, that will be his ultimate torment: she will be out of his life,

and he will be out of _her_ life,

forever.

 _We never should have met._

* * *

 _ **A/N:**_ The repeated question on both sites I posted was: will there be a "Sesshomaru's POV"? Yes. Like what I said, the story will be seen from 3 perspectives/POVs. _His will be the last one_. If you are patient enough and will be able to stick through the angst (heheheee), you will get to see everything through Sesshomaru's eyes.

I really hope you guys will, because, I don't want to spoil anything, so I'll just say Naraku's, and _most especially_ Sesshomaru's POV carries the main story.

Until next time.


	4. Despair

_**A/N:**_ sorry i forgot! trigger warning for what lies ahead.

* * *

 _ **\- Part I: There's Something About Him -**_

* * *

 _ **Despair**_

* * *

-Kagome-

Her heart raced fast when she walked into her classroom that morning. It was such a familiar scene: a crying girl, surrounded by a group of smirking, judgemental faces. She was holding her hand to her cheek.

She had been slapped, and a raven-haired senior, one she recognized as Sango- a class rep from fourth-year B, was looking at the poor girl with a smirk on her face. "That's what you get for trying to seduce my boyfriend," she spat out. A flame of anger burst out from Kagome, and she strode forward.

Kagome raised her palm. Without any hesitation she struck the senior's cheek, the crisp sound of her slap resounding through the classroom. Eyes were wide, and gasps erupted as the shocked victim looked at her with wide eyes.

"Shit. What was that for?!" the raven-haired girl blurted out, horrified.

"Whatever issues you have with her, by no means you have to drag out in public." Kagome threatened, "Why are you doing this? You sick attention seeker."

"Woah there," Sango said as she backed away. "I think you got this all confused-"

Kagome turned around, only to see the crying girl had stopped her dramatics, pulling her arm, pulling Kagome away from Sango. "Class Rep, it's okay. You see-"

"The hell is it okay?" Kagome countered.

"Excuse me," Sango strode forward, putting a hand on her hip, "but maybe you failed to see the sign posted in front of your classroom door."

"Huh?" Kagome pulled away, confused. She turned to the entrance and indeed, there was a large paper that read, "Drama Club Auditions 6am-8am, Mon-Wed."

* * *

"I'm sorry," Kagome bowed before her lunch companion. She had apologized for the umpteenth time the whole morning, yet the angry red mark on the other girl's cheek begged for her apology.

"It's okay," Sango blushed, "you treating me to lunch is enough. Besides, that's what I would probably do if I walked into the same scene." She fell silent and gave a curious, hard look at Kagome."Hey, I know this is personal, but... aren't you that Higurashi girl?"

Kagome instantly paled. _Did she figure out too?_ She straightened her shoulders, and that cheerful mask defensively barricaded her face. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Sango paused for long moments. "Uhm... Higurashi Kaguya, am I right? Class Representative of Third Year-A?"

A long breath of relief escaped Kagome's lips. "Yes, I am."

"I'm sorry if I offended you in any way," Sango bowed her head in apology. "I was just gonna ask you how you are related to Higurashi Kikyo. You see, I transferred last year from Shibuya. We attended the same middle school together. We're not that close, but I'd see her once in a while around campus. I just wanted to see how she was doing."

Kagome's brows knit together in confusion.

 _I grew up in Shibuya. Not Kikyo. She grew up in Bunkyo._

"You must have mistaken her as her cousin," Kagome said. "Higurashi Kagome. She practically grew up there."

"Kagome?" Sango pondered. "I'm sorry... I don't think I remember a Kagome in middle school."

Kagome sat quietly under Sango's brainstorming. _How strange._

Finally, Sango shifted. "Ah, are you talking about Higurashi Kagome, her homeschooled cousin in the old shrine in Bunkyo? I remember Kikyo bragging about how she had relatives who bore the pure Shikon blood. You know, they aged as slow as youkai or whatever. _"_

Kagome fell quiet, contemplating. As far as she could remember, it was Kikyo who was the Shikon maiden in the older Shrine. Which would make no sense.

Why was Kikyo living in Shibuya now, and she in Bunkyo?

Sango huffed, waving the topic off in dismissal. "Oh, I have all our yearbooks from school with me. I'll try to look Kagome up tonight, maybe I just forgot. And I'll get back to you tomorrow, alright?"

Kagome nodded absently, still deeply troubled.

"Hey," Sango interjected again, startling the thinking girl. "I heard rumors that circulated just this morning... about you and Sesshomaru-sama of Fourth Year-A."

Kagome's eyes instantly hardened. "What about?" her tone changing, so... dead, that the senior had to do a double take.

"That both of you are an... 'item.'"

Sango was answered with a very long silence. "Kaguya-chan," she followed up, very carefully. "I'm not gonna warn you about his reputation with the girls, because I myself think he is highly misunderstood. With the girls-"

"I don't care about his escapades." Kagome cut off. She didn't want to sound avoiding and defensive, like a pathetic martyr girlfriend. She just wasn't interested.

He could fuck the whole cheerleading squad, for all she cared.

"With the girls," Sango stubbornly continued, grabbing her hand to hold her attention, "they would cling to him like static. And the ones who had bragged about sleeping with him, I'd say they were the ones who forced themselves to his bed- they-"

"I don't care, Sango." Kagome grimaced, "You don't have to apologize for him. He knows exactly what he's doing."

 _Enough. This is so awkward... and uncomfortable._

Sango blushed. "I'm sorry. I just thought, since you are a new student, you might be discouraged when you hear such destroying rumors about your boyfriend." She looked at Kagome sheepishly. " I respect Sesshomaru-sama and all, but, the biased rumors of his rakishness is not what concerns me. They are unfounded and untrue." She paused in contemplation. "Kaguya-chan, there's a heavy rumor about him, about his explosive behavior."

Kagome finally looked at her, and Sango took it as a sign to continue.

"He almost killed a girl once. It was only gossip, and I had not witnessed it myself because it happened almost two years ago, when I wasn't here..." Sango dropped her voice so low, "The girl was a freshman... A wolf-youkai, I heard. He ripped her throat open. They said blood was all over the walls from his violent attack- it was only when his group of youkai friends intervened was it stopped.

Everyone is staying silent though as if it never happened. But who knows?" Sango observed the girl quietly. "I'm sorry, Kaguya-chan. I just want you to be safe."

The bell suddenly rang, concluding the lunch hour. As Kagome gathered her thoughts, she suddenly felt a soft kiss on her head. She looked up, only to see the beautiful face of the person she hated the most.

Sesshomaru Taisho.

His unbound white hair fell over her face, isolating them from the eyes of the watching crowd. "There you are." he said, "I've been looking for you." he kissed her again, and Kagome forced herself not to wince. She dropped her gaze to Sango, who was blushing to death at his shameless display of affection.

"Oh, I'm sorry, were you planning to have lunch together?" Sango said as she pointed at the two bento boxes on his hands. It was full and untouched.

"No worries." Sesshomaru straightened. "My little shrine-girl is probably not accustomed to having her future mate constantly follow her around."

Sango squealed giddily at his blatant announcement. Kagome turned to him, and their eyes met. Sesshomaru reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair in her ear. "Can I at least walk you to your classroom?"

Kagome stood without answering, and she looked at Sango. "See you tomorrow," Kagome said, and the senior happily waved goodbye to the new couple.

The back of their hands accidentally touched as they walked away. The third-year instantly pulled back, but the Inuyoukai swiftly wrapped his hand around hers and held her tight.

* * *

 _There's something about him that I couldn't place,_

Kagome thought as she opened her eyes to an empty classroom, the golden rays of the afternoon sun spilling into the windows. She fell asleep while filing the papers for her class, and she woke up to an odd sight.

He was sitting on the floor, leaning on the wall by the window,

his eyes that were as gold as the lonely sunset stared at her emptily, waiting.

 _I don't know why, but he reminds me of what mama used to say._

It was her second day with him, and he had not made any advances as she had expected. He would only fall quietly to her side, a little tuck of a stray strand of hair to her ear, a soft brush of his fingers to her cheeks,

a whispered _"I love you, Kagome,"_ in the most unexpected places and times.

And when they were alone like this, he would fall into a quiet spell. He would stare at her as if she were a distant ghost, the detached longing in his eyes too intense she always had to look away.

Him sitting before her, he looked as if he had a very thick mask donned on his face-

He looked like a soulless, empty shell.

 _"Sometimes, the strongest people in the morning are the people who cried all night, and the toughest people you see on the surface are the most broken ones underneath."_

Kagome sat up from her slouched position and held his gaze.

 _He is... strange._

"Kagome," he suddenly said, his face holding that dead, detached mask.

"What if I told you that we met before, and you promised me you'd love me until your last breath?"

Something in her spirit flared with anger. What was he saying? They did not meet before. Her father sent her away to Shibuya at a very young age. That was where she grew up, with her uncle and aunt, she went to school there, had childhood friends, had a side job in the local grocery, was raised as a shrine girl. She was only back in Bunkyo right after middle school-

He was nowhere involved in her memory, except for his infrequent visits in the shrine. She chuckled.

"Then I would say you're crazy."

The silence did not seem to disturb his detachment.

"What if I told you that I loved you... and still love you,

and I'll do anything just to call you mine again?"

 _How can you lie so blatantly?_

 _How can you say such heavy words with that blank mask on your face?_

"Senpai," she looked at him, "Surely you would be aware by now, that I'm never gonna believe anything that you say?"

 _You lying, manipulative bastard._

Abruptly she stood, gathering her bag to walk away from all the ridiculousness when a strong grip forced her back to come crashing into a firm chest. His arm snaked tightly around her waist, and his hand gripped her small chin from behind, tilting her head up. His warm breath ghosted in her ears and goosebumps rode all over her flesh,

"Kiss me, Kagome," he demanded, roughly yanking her neck sideways and dipped down, pressing his lips to that sensitive spot where her neck and shoulder connected. Her eyes flew open, and she shivered. She spun around, her arms in front of her as she tried to push him away.

 _Don't touch me-_

 _Please, you've violated me already... what else do you want from me?_

He took the chance to shove her to the blackboard, and his lips came crashing against hers. She did not respond. He suddenly bit down and she gasped, and he took the chance and invaded her with his tongue. She moaned in protest, her tears streaking down her cheeks.

 _Stop, please,_

She shook her head but he continued, sucking out the very breath out of her lungs, sucking out her soul. His tongue explored every corner of her mouth, his lips devouring her relentlessly, and she did not notice his hand had traveled to the buttons on her school uniform until she felt a cold draft of air pass on her exposed chest.

Her knees buckled and lost all its strength. She slid down, Sesshomaru did not even bother to keep her standing as he sank on the floor with her. She felt his hand squeeze her bare breast, and his mouth close in to another. She gasped, a red flush on her cheeks,

"Senpai, what are you doing! Stop..." she tried to push his head away but he did not budge, as he swirled his tongue around a hardened nipple, and he sucked, the strange sensation bringing a flood of hot liquid on her nether regions.

"Stop!" she cried out as his mouth assaulted the other nub, his hands relentless, kneading her flesh, teasing her peaks. Her feet were thrashing, her hands were pushing him away, "Senpai, please stop!"

He pulled her to him and she found herself on his lap, her back on the wall, and he crushed her in a desperate embrace.

"Why do you deny me?" he rasped, "listen to your body, Kagome. Can't you see the way you respond?"

Kagome closed her eyes as he started grinding his hips on her hiked-up skirt, she tried to close her thighs but he was already between them. He had unzipped his pants and she could feel his large, hard arousal penetrating through the thin material of his boxers and her underwear. He thrusted, the length of his hardness pressing on the middle of her core.

"No,"

He pounded, again and again, her back painfully banging on the wooden wall. She could feel the painful friction between them grow less and less, as their rubbing parts grew shamefully slick and hot as he continued his dry-hump. Moisture soaked both the cloths that served as a barrier between him and her.

She could already feel the form of his dick eating into the gap of her wet panties.

She shook her head,

 _Strange..._

 _I feel so strange..._

Her tears did not stop, her whimpers growing more desperate,

"Stop... I don't like it... Sesshomaru!"

 _I feel thirsty, and my mouth is dry..._

 _why don't you listen to me?_

 _I feel so strange, I'm burning... I don't like this heat..._

Her protests were being forced down by his selfish kisses. He lurched forward and nipped at her breasts, and she looked away, crying. His tongue and hands were all over her bare skin, touching intimate places she had thought she reserved for the one she truly loved.

"Kagome, look at me." he whispered, she could feel his engorged shaft conform to his boxers, teasing her covered, shamefully wet entrance, "Look at me, please,"

She shook her head in denial, and tears streaked down her eyes. She felt him pull away from her. Gentle hands cupped her face, "Kagome."

She opened her eyes, and Sesshomaru pulled away when he saw what was in there.

Unbridled fear.

His eyes grew wide. Sesshomaru sat up and gathered the sobbing girl in his arms. He allowed her to cry her shock out, and he rocked her tenderly like a little child, stroking her hair.

 _How dare you touch me so gently now... I hate you,_

 _Sesshomaru... how dare you._

"That day, after the scandal... he said the 'challenge' was not supposed to be you," he shook, the madness in his voice making him sound delirious. "I swear, Kagome..." he whispered, softly now as he was calming down, "I never agreed to participate in anything. I didn't know what was happening. I was drunk... utterly wasted...

and then you stumbled into the door," She could feel him bunch her hair in his hands so tight it was painful, "I lost control of myself."

Kagome only shook her head, her tears soaking in his white hair, her bare breasts crushed on his chest, his throbbing length still pressing on her thinly protected folds.

"I'll wait until the full moon," he said as he kissed her bruised lips, kissed the spot where her shoulder and neck connected, "I'll wait." His claws dug into the flesh of her back possessively.

Kagome remained limp on his arms like a broken puppet.

 _It still hurts._

 _My whole body is overrun with painful scars you created,_

 _and I cannot recover._

He held her protectively in the quiet of the empty classroom, his head leaning on hers. His hands then took her own, and there it was again, he let her trace the outline of his face, his lips and jawline. "I love you, Kagome," he whispered desperately.

 _Unfortunately, I'll never believe a single word you say._

 _Four days more,_

 _Sesshomaru._

 _And both of us will be rid of this painful torture._


	5. Doubt, Fidelity

_**A/N:**_ Taken from the last chapter:

" _Her father sent her away to Shibuya at a very young age. That was where she grew up, with her uncle and aunt, she went to school there, had childhood friends..." -_ There are two shrines, An older one in Bunkyo, and another one in Shibuya. Her father sent her to Shibuya when she was very young.

" _She was only back in Bunkyo right after middle school-"_ fresh out of middle school she is back in Bunkyo, back to her parents, so she has no memory whatsoever of their own shrine because she did not grow up there, _ **she remembers growing up in Shibuya.**_

They enrolled her at a high school in Tokyo proper. (The city itself.) She was living with an uncle that was nearby the school. So after the scandal, she goes back home to their shrine only to have her father send her back to Shibuya.

That would explain why Kagome was deeply troubled when she talked to Sango, because Sango was telling her the exact opposite of whatever she remembered.

I hope that clarifies it a bit! ******* Big thanks to Jen for the beautiful cover art =,( huhuhuuu *******

 **Yuinou** \- formal Japanese Engagement ceremony

* * *

 _ **Doubt, Fidelity**_

* * *

"What is this?" Kagome stared at the object in her hand. It was a gloomy noon and clouds were gathering overhead. They were eating lunch, Sesshomaru had been sitting by her side with one hand on her lap when he suddenly handed her a photo. She looked up to see his face-

golden eyes were reflecting such hope she had to look away.

"It's proof," he said, peering down, trying to establish eye contact. She simply wouldn't.

"You could have easily photoshopped this." Kagome negated. She noticed his hand on her lap fist the material of her skirt, and she looked back to him-

There it was: the thick, soulless mask was donned again.

"Why don't you believe me?" he said, and Kagome handed the photo back to him.

"You could have easily photoshopped this," Kagome repeated, but the despair in his eyes, it had built up for the past three days now, he had been looking at her with such pleading despair it was starting to knock on her impenetrable fortress.

She was not a heartless monster, after all.

And she remembered her conversation with Sango yesterday-

It left her tired and sleepless. For the whole night, it troubled her to no end. She was thankful for the wonderful invention of makeup and concealer. It hid her dark circles, but it did not hide the apparent exhaust to her body. "Show me more- surely you have more than one." She said without looking at him. A long silence held them both until Sesshomaru finally shifted.

"I only have this one."

Kagome chuckled bitterly. "Senpai," blue eyes connected to gold, "If you're gonna fake something, at least make it believable and back it up. You're a terrible liar." she almost laughed. Truly she did, the thought of Sesshomaru doing something as ridiculous as this had tickled her whimsy-

was that how desperate he was?

She bit her tongue. A harsh sentence was about to escape her lips. The only thing that stopped her was when she remembered their lesson about Youkai emotions, and how they tend to 'mask' it.

Looking at him now, with such a thick, dead mask on his face-

What was going on in his mind?

Kagome stood up, not wanting to think more. He followed closely behind, grabbing her wrist and pulling her to a stop. "My father," he started, "he threw everything away. He had all my files and videos of us deleted when you disappeared, and I only have this one left."

They stared at each other for long moments.

The bell suddenly chimed, signaling the end of lunch period. Kagome snapped out of whatever she was thinking and started to pull away, but he held her fast.

"Kagome, at least let me walk you to your classroom." he pulled her to him and embraced her, kissing her hair tenderly. The students that passed by had blushed on his audacity, and Kagome quietly conceded, not wanting to make a scene.

* * *

For the rest of the afternoon the girl was a mess. She tried to concentrate on her lessons, tried to focus on the teacher's voice, but nothing could pull her out of her distraction. It was to the point that she didn't even notice the teacher's hand tap her shoulder. She apologized but then her sensei pointed out how much of a miserable wreck she looked, and so she sent her to the Nurse's Office.

Kagome lay down in one of the beds, drowning in her thoughts.

The photo that he had shown her-

It looked so real.

The privacy curtain suddenly moved, and Kagome weakly shifted her gaze towards the intruder. The familiar face of her friend Sango peeked from behind the curtain and she smiled.

* * *

"Are you sure you're okay, Kaguya?" Sango sat at her bedside, and Kagome nodded quietly.

"Wow, you look like a hot mess. Girl, what are you fretting about? You're dating one of the richest, hottest bachelors in Tokyo- Oh my gosh Kaguya, you probably have a screw loose up there! What the hell is your problem!" Sango playfully bonked her head with one of the books she brought with her.

Kagome almost rolled her eyes. "You call a boy in high school a _hot bachelor_? Perhaps you're the one with a loose screw."

Sango gaped at her, her jaw almost falling off the floor. "What?" Kagome raised her brow at her.

"Kaguya," Sango braced her hands on Kagome's shoulders and shook her. "Where the fuck have you been living your whole life? In a cave?!"

The third year only looked back at her blankly.

"Kaguya-chan," Sango shook her head morosely, this time Sango took her hands firmly, the look of exaggerated concern melting into a genuine one. "You know that Youkai age differently than humans, do you?"

Kagome nodded her head, and it was then that it dawned on her.

"For them to reach that physical maturity, they would have to be at least three hundred years old," Sango explained quietly. "They're only enrolled here because of that youkai-human treaty created sixty years ago." she peered at Kagome's lost expression.

"To enforce fairness, youkai also need to conform to the requirements of human society. They should at least have graduated high school, or some formal education, to be recognized in human society and legitimately hold a business or a job."

Kagome paled. _If this has been going on for so long... why don't I know about this?_

"Hey," Sango suddenly said, rousing her from her thoughts. "I'm not here to tell you how ancient your boyfriend is." Sango shifted and took out a stack of thick books, dumping it in between them. "I came here to show you _this._ "

Kagome took one and looked over the covers, and her eyes widened as she realized what it was. They were school yearbooks. "What class did you say _Kagome Higurashi_ was at?" Sango asked, and Kagome fell quiet.

She recalled fond memories in Shibuya, of her classmates, her summer jobs, and Kagome ran her hands on the paper.

"She was always in Class A." she answered definitively, and she looked at Sango, from which the senior gave her an encouraging nod. Kagome started going through the first one, skimming through the familiar faces of her middle school classmates.

When she reached Higurashi, she felt her strength leave her.

Printed on it was _Higurashi Kikyo,_ and a picture of her cousin was above the name.

 _It cant be_ ,

She took another yearbook, and she did not find her face. It was Kikyo in her place, she snatched the other yearbook, and she felt a frustrating heat rise in her.

 _Impossible_ , she thought as her eyes darted madly from one open yearbook to another,

 _Impossible!_

"Kaguya!" she heard someone shout, and Kagome was sucked back into the present. Sango's wide eyes met her, the hold on her shoulder tight. Kagome realized as she looked around her that the books were strewn across messily, drops of tears were on the paper. She had been crying, and Sango looked at her with utter concern.

"Perhaps you should go home," she said, "You look like you need some rest." She pulled the yearbooks away, "We'll continue this when you feel better." she had to yank the yearbooks out of the desperate girl's hands. "Oh, and Kaguya," she said as she took out her phone,

"One last thing. I did my own research about that Kagome girl you were talking about. It was hard to find, but my father is the curator of the museum down in Shinjuku. It was in their electronic records."

Sango held her smartphone out to her, showing to her a scanned article- a very old one- dated in the 1860s-

a hundred and fifty years ago, about the Higurashi Shrine in Bunkyo.

" _The Higurashi Shrine celebrates the birth of their daughter, Higurashi Kagome."_ it read, and instantly Kagome felt all her blood drain from her.

 _Higurashi Kyoshiro, last known bearer of the pure Shikon Blood, is proud to announce the birth of their daughter, Kagome, with his wife, Anna. Being firstborn, little Kagome is expected to be the only one of their children to be passed on his pure blood. She will bear the responsibility of carrying on the family tradition of guarding the Shrine and the sacred Jewel rumored to be buried underneath."_

"The Shikon Guardian will choose their partner and will bind their lifespan so that the partner could live as long as the guardian," Sango said. "And only the firstborn inherits the pure blood. It has been tradition, for so long."

Sango paused, concerned at her quiet companion. "Anyone who bears that blood will age as slow as youkai, so she's probably still alive by now, and maybe looks our age. You're related to Kagome, right? Why don't you just contact her, or go to their old shrine in Bunkyo?"

She stared as Kagome only looked back at her with lost eyes,

"Kaguya, maybe you should really need to go home and rest." Sango slowly patted her shoulder and brought her gaze outside. A low rumble of thunder resounded in the sky, and a torrential downpour started outside.

* * *

 _I can't be the Shikon Maiden. I don't have holy powers,_

 _I grew up as an ordinary girl in Shibuya-_

Kagome stood quietly on the platform, soaking wet from the rain that started to pour down when she began her walk towards the station. The steady hum of rainfall was heavy on her ears, but she was drowning in her own thoughts.

Her train finally arrived, and she absently stepped inside.

 _I'm so confused..._

 _Mama, what is happening? I don't have anyone to ask..._

 _I don't have anyone to talk to-_

She recalled trying to call her uncle last night- he never answered. He was rarely at the house, for his work he traveled a lot. She asked Souta, but he knew nothing.

Just before the train closed its doors, she felt a familiar grip on her wrist. She looked up, expecting to see familiar white hair and golden eyes.

Without fail she did.

Sesshomaru was still in his school uniform, equally soaked in the rain. He was out of breath. He had been running, trying to catch up to her. "I heard they sent you to the nurse's office, but you weren't there. I had to find you- are you alright?" He cupped her face, his eyes frantically searching for anything that stood out of the ordinary.

She stared at him emptily, unable to speak to him. What was there to say, anyway? The doors closed, and Kagome looked down, absorbed in her thoughts. She pulled away and took hold of the railing. The seats were already full.

They stood beside each other, quiet under the bustle of the train.

" Are you avoiding me?" he said, his gaze locked on the floor. The train halted to a stop, and their elbows bumped on each other.

It took her a long while before she answered.

"No."

Kagome's thoughts were still on the yearbooks, the article. It never left, it had been running in her mind the whole time, and she was exhausted. She had no sleep, felt so confused, she just wanted to go home and get to bed.

Kagome had not looked at him since the ride started until the train halted to a stop again. The doors opened, and an elderly lady exited, leaving behind an empty seat in front of them.

Kagome was about to sit when Sesshomaru took the seat himself.

 _What a jerk._

He suddenly reached out and pulled her to him, and she found herself sitting awkwardly on his wet lap. Then again, they found themselves lost in a quiet spell as the train started running.

"Senpai," she mumbled, "That girl they said you almost killed two years ago, that wolf-youkai. Was she the girl who spread our pictures on the internet?"

Silence.

"Will you be mad at me if I said yes?"

"I don't know," she answered.

"Then I don't know either." He leaned on her, and his hands wrapped tightly around her waist.

"If something is bothering you, tell me." He said so quietly she was surprised she heard it. "This time, I will listen. I promise I will never ignore what you say... I will listen."

 _You are confusing me even more,_ she cast her head down, her eyes as empty as his. She felt cold from the wet, and a comforting heat from his embrace, but she tried to ignore it.

"I love you, Kagome," he whispered. His hold to her was so tight it squeezed the breath out of her lungs. And for the rest of the train ride, he did not move. She wondered if he had fallen asleep.

She felt little wet drops on her back, but it probably was just from his sopping wet hair.

* * *

Kagome laid on her bed, exhausted from the day. Replays of their parting that night played in her mind. He had walked her home up to the very gate of her uncle's house and kissed her.

He kissed her under the rain, and she could feel, from under her clothes, the bruises that his hands left her as he clung to her tight during the kiss. He let her retrace the outline of his face, something she noticed he would always do whenever he held her.

She took the smartphone from beside her, and she swiped it open. 18 messages, 7 missed calls. All from Sesshomaru.

-Dry yourself, please, or you'll get a cold.-

-Did you have dinner already?-

-I'm doing my 'homework' right now. Isn't this pointless?-

She scanned the other messages. Sesshomaru was just sending her little nothings about his night.

From her exhaustion, Kagome recalled the night at the party, and the alcohol on his breath when he hovered close. His eyes were continually teetering from gold to red at that time,

" _I didn't agree to participate in anything. I didn't know what was happening..."_

She closed her eyes. He could have spread the video of them when she was away. He could have bragged about his conquest, and she would have heard from those fake friends of hers. But they were gone.

Her phone beeped again. She opened her eyes and saw another message from him appear.

-I'm going to sleep now. Goodnight, Kagome.-

She let out a long, tired exhale, exhausted from the day and its miserable unfolding.

 _Perhaps... we both were the victims of that stupid scandal._

She took her phone and typed something, and she hit send.

Kagome repositioned to her side, the dim of her night light casting lonely shadows in her room. The rain was still heavy outside, and she stared quietly at the plane ticket on her study desk.

It was the one that bound her to Chicago, to a distant relative, three days from now.

* * *

Sesshomaru prepared himself for another sleepless night when his phone suddenly beeped. He snatched the phone up, and a frown etched on his face. He had never given his private number to anyone except his closest group of friends-

When he opened the message, his hands froze momentarily, upon seeing the name of the sender on his screen.

 _Kagome._

The Inuyoukai just laid there, his detached mask washing over his face. It took him a while before he gathered his courage to read the message, steeling himself for another blow of hurt, expecting another clout of sarcasm and dripping hate.

But when he finally opened it, tears instantly streaked out of his dead, golden eyes.

 _-Goodnight, Sesshomaru.-_

He stared at those two words from her for a very long time, clung to it desperately as if it were his lifeline. And he quietly laid there, crying in the dark.

The sound of the heavy rain was drumming on the roof, as heavy as the tears that spilled from his eyes.

Beside him, framed on the bedside table, was the photo he showed to her earlier that day:

It was a picture of them after their _Yuinou:_ they were both garbed in formal kimonos, all smiles to the camera, Kagome brightly holding up the Obi he had gifted to her that beautiful summer day.


	6. Intervention

_**A/N:**_ I would just like to say I really appreciate your reviews, favs/follows. Thank you, really! Writing emotionally-charged stories is draining. Your feedback always gives me the motivation. :) Unfortunately, I can't answer _all_ your questions in my A/N. ( _especially_ the memory one.) Of course it will be addressed. But everything will unfold as the story progresses. =)

 **Warning, this chapter contains mature content.**

* * *

 _ **Intervention**_

* * *

 _I realize... as the days with him pass by..._

She clutched the covered bowl of soup tightly in her hands. Kagome stood by the doorway, doubting herself. She had texted him a few minutes ago asking him where he was. He never replied, and so she decided to walk up to his classroom to bring the food to him.

She realized it was a foolish mistake.

He was sitting by the window, his eyes glued to his phone as if in a trance. His best friend Naraku was leaning by the windowsill, and he had his arm around his mate, Kagura. He was leaning down attentively as she was pointing at something with a frown on her face.

To what she was pointing at was another girl, whom she recognized as Fourth Year Yamada Rin, probably the prettiest girl in school.

She had her arm around Sesshomaru's, and she was leaning forward to press a soft kiss on his lips.

 _I'm starting to feel things I shouldn't._

Naraku's gaze suddenly snapped towards her, and their eyes met. She watched as his eyes widened in surprise, and he quickly turned to Sesshomaru, his mouth open to tell him something.

She did not bother to watch whatever happened next. Her feet backpedaled away, and she spun around and ran.

 _Stupid, stupid Kagome._

Her feet carried her as fast as she can, down the stairs, bumping through students on her way, she was struggling to catch her breath. She stopped at the back of the school building, and she leaned on the dusty wall. The horrible smell of the dumpster wafted in her nose, and she clutched the glass bowl that held her homemade soup tight.

What had ever possessed her to make this?

The image of a drenched, shivering Sesshomaru flashed on her mind, as she left him outside the rain last night without even saying goodbye. She tried to rectify it by sending him a text message saying 'goodnight,' but it did not help the smidge of guilt she felt.

Even if she harbored this grudge against him, she was still her, still _Kagome_ , that humble little girl who grew up in a sheltered shrine.

 _Don't show him kindness. You already started your torture four days ago._

 _Being nice to him now will only drive the knife you planted deeper_

 _when you leave him for Chicago._

She shook her head, unable to believe how heartless she had become.

Her eyes steeled, and Kagome strode forward towards the dumpster. Reaching her hands out she dumped the bowl in the trash, along with the many other garbage the school had collected for the morning.

Tears streaked down her eyes on her realization.

 _Aside from hurting yourself, you're hurting other people. What are you doing?_

 _Stop this, Kagome. Just stop. If you're leaving him, just go now._

 _Stop prolonging his agony. You've become a monster._

"Kagome," a familiar voice suddenly interrupted her thoughts, and she spun around, meeting his golden eyes. He looked at her, shocked at the blatant tears running down her cheeks. "Kagome, what's wrong-" he stepped forward, but she backed away.

She wiped the tears from her cheeks. "It's nothing, Senpai."

His eyes narrowed. "You're calling me Senpai again..." he said, "Just last night, and this morning in your text message you were calling me by my name,"

"I said its nothing," she dismissed. She steeled herself. She was ending this torture now, "just go back. She's waiting for you there, I can manage by myself." she looked at him, but did not expect the panic that was rising in his expression.

The dead mask melted into one of fear, and it was when Kagome had realized, he had completely misunderstood what she was saying.

"I was reading your message," he said, his tone miserably hopeless as he strode forward and caught her by her small shoulders, "I couldn't believe that you texted me first- Kagome, I didn't know what she was doing until Naraku yelled at me-"

 _Stop, Sesshomaru, just stop..._

 _youre making this harder for both of us-_

"Kagome," he crushed her in his arms, "I swear, I never even dared to touch another...

the rumors, they spread only because I rejected them," she tried to pull away when he abruptly did himself. "What did you throw in the dumpster?" he suddenly asked, and she looked away.

"Nothing." She said, when he swiftly disappeared before her. She watched in horror as he jumped inside the filthy container and started rummaging.

"Stop," she whimpered, "What are you doing?!"

He emerged from the garbage dump, his pristine white uniform dirtied and filthy. He had recovered the bowl in his hands. "Did you make this for me?" he said as he opened the container.

Kagome looked helplessly at his pathetic form as he tried to salvage her soup.

 _Why are you doing this?_

"Stop... it's from the garbage, it's disgusting," She reached out, her body shaking with absolute anger, "Just stop,"

 _I'm supposed to hate you, Sesshomaru..._

 _stop making me pity you-_

"Stop!"

But his hands were like steel, as he lifted the dirty bowl to his lips. "It's still good," he said as he finally took a sip. "I feel as if it's been forever since you made something for me-" he said as he lifted the bowl again to take another taste.

"Sesshomaru, just STOP!" she screamed, knocking it forcefully away from his hands, and the bowl toppled to the ground, the precious contents spilling on the concrete. Sesshomaru stood frozen at where they were at.

She was holding him, her arms around him in an angry embrace, trapping his movement as she dug her face into his chest. "I'll make you another one," she said, infuriated, her tears soaking his shirt. "Its home economics after this period- I'll make you another one. Just... stop trying to salvage that dumb soup from the garbage,"

 _Why are you doing this?_

 _I'm not supposed to be nice to you!_

"You're making another one for me?" he echoed, and Kagome cringed at the distressing tone of his voice.

 _Stop acting so pitiful.._.

"Yes," she replied, and slowly her grip loosened, and he wrapped his own arms around her.

"Kagome," he whispered, "Kagome, you have no fucking idea how happy you just made me -" he pulled away and cupped her face, and trailed her with tender kisses all over.

 _How can you be this way?_

 _You hurt me, force me to do things I don't want to,_

 _yet another side of you..._

He wiped her tears away with his hands, "I'm sorry about Rin... Kagome I didn't -"

 _Another side of you..._

 _makes it harder for me to leave..._

She shook her head, "It's nothing, Sesshomaru." He sighed as he heard her mention his name, and he smiled.

* * *

Her last period was Physical Education, and Kagome, still clad in her shirt and gym bloomers, was on her way to the classroom to retrieve her water bottle. Ever distracted she kept her gaze cast on the floor as she made her way through the empty corridors.

 _That article was on the 1860s..._

 _A hundred and fifty years ago._

" _ **The Higurashi Shrine celebrates the birth of their daughter Higurashi Kagome."**_

She climbed up the stairs absently, her mind absorbed in her thoughts.

 _Was that girl really me? Why don't I remember anything?_

" _ **What if I told you we met before, and you promised me you'd love me until your last breath?"**_

 _I want to ask him too. But seeing how desperate he is, I won't be able to find out the real truth._

 _Mama... I'm so confused... There are gaps in my memory..._

 _and I have no one to talk to,_

Unchecked tears escaped down her cheeks yet again, and she stopped her walk.

 _Ah, I can't stop crying._

She stood hidden in the corner, trying to force her tears to cease. After a few solemn moments she finally breathed, and she opened her eyes. She steeled her resolve. _I will get through this._

As she started her strides she suddenly hit something tall and firm, and it knocked her balance off. She fell back two paces, and she realized, there was nothing underneath her feet.

She had reached the edge of the stairs, and she was falling backwards.

"Woah there!" a male voice exclaimed as she lifted her gaze. The man reached out to her as she was falling, and he roughly pulled her to him and wrapped her in a protective embrace, as he spun around to the other direction- avoiding the stairs.

They finally steadied and regained balance, as they both released a sigh of relief.

"Are you okay?" The young man asked, as she opened her eyes and looked up. He was indeed a tall one, as tall as Sesshomaru- he was wearing a blue, form-fitting button-up shirt with an amber tie.

 _A professor?_ She read the name on his badge. _Hasegawa Kouga._

"Shit, I guess I should say we should both watch where we're going," he laughed apologetically and released her. Kagome, despite herself, gave him a small smile.

"Physical Ed?" he said as he knelt down and picked up his scattered books.

"Can't you tell?" she answered as she dropped down to help. She didn't mean to be sarcastic, but unfortunately it came out that way, and he laughed so easily.

"I was on my way to my class myself. Guess they'll have to wait then."

She piled the last book at his hands. "What do you teach?"

"Youkai and Human History. I exclusively teach the Fourth Years, that's why you don't see me often, Kaguya-san." The mention of her name left her frozen, and she quickly stood.

She stiffened when he grabbed her wrist.

"Do you want to have coffee with me after class? Or if you're not into caffeine, there's some French Pastry in Shinjuku. Expensive, but if you're with me it'd be worth it," he asked so very casually, and Kagome pulled her hand away, feeling a terrible knot form in her stomach.

 _Shit. What have I walked into._

"I don't think that's a good idea, _Sensei._ " she tried to emphasize the last word to him, in hopes that it would snap him back to his senses. He merely chuckled.

"You're what, Third Year? Next year you'll graduate. Waiting a year more is nothing for me, Kaguya-san. I'll admit... the moment I laid eyes on you during the opening ceremony, I was smitten. And if it worries you, I'm a wolf, I belong in the canine family.

Which would make me a pretty loyal _mate_."

"I have a boyfriend," she said, "so NO."

She winced when he leaned forward, and she braced her legs to deliver a kick to his balls, _teacher or not_ , when he stopped at a distance and whispered. "Think about it, Kaguya-san."

He sauntered away, and Kagome let out a long breath of relief. Ensuring that her goosebumps had recovered from that creepy encounter, she turned around, and stiffened.

Sesshomaru was at the top of the stairs, his eyes teetering dangerously from gold to red.

"Who were you talking to?" he said, the anguished tone in his voice obliterated, replaced by a harshness that made her hackles rise again.

"Your crazy teacher, that's who." She said as she started her way towards him. But she suddenly felt herself slammed back against the concrete wall, the blow knocking her breath away.

"Why do you smell of him?" he growled, his nails digging into her arms. Drops of blood ran down her skin as he raked his claws into her flesh angrily-

"I almost fell down the stairs," she whimpered in pain, her resolve faltering, "He was only trying to protect me...Sesshomaru, you're hurting me-"

"You're mine, Kagome! Don't you understand that?" he slammed her again on the wall, "All of you belongs to me!" he screamed, and her whole body was drenched in fear.

His eyes were completely red.

He suddenly grabbed her by the hair and dragged her with him up the stairs, her pathetic protests drowned by his rage. They entered an empty room, and he slammed the door shut. He threw her small body across the wall, and she sank on the floor, losing the strength of her knees. Her breath shook, as she realized-

 _It's happening again..._

"You're hurting me," she cried, as he appeared before her and started ripping her shirt off.

"Sesshomaru, stop!" she thrashed wildly against his arms of steel, and tears spilled from her eyes as he started running his hands all over her body, running his tongue across her skin, madly trying to erase the wolf-youkai's scent and replace it with his. Goosebumps rode over her flesh from where his tongue ran, and she felt her skin burning, that strange heat starting to inflame her again.

"Sesshomaru, no!"

He yanked her hair roughly as he pulled her towards him and assaulted her with a searing kiss. She moaned her protests, but he drowned it with his desperate need to dominate, "No one is to touch you like this, understand?" he crushed her half-naked, bloodied body against his, staining his white shirt with copious amounts of bright red, and Kagome couldn't help but cry.

 _Why do you do this?_

She fought back, her feet kicking, her arms pushing him away, but he was too strong. Panic consumed her being as he pulled her bloomers down, and even before she could realize what was happening, his finger penetrated into her unprepared folds.

She cried out in distress, and he dragged it out, only to plunge in again with two digits. His finger curled inside her, and her knees buckled, her muscles clamping down in shock. She tried to squeeze her thighs together, tried to reject the unwanted intruder. But he thrusted, and with every thrust brought in a shameful wetness that started dripping down her thighs.

"Stop...please, Sesshomaru- not like this," she cried as her body thrashed uncomfortably, but he held her down with his weight, his lips trying to seal her desperate pleas.

"Only I can touch you like this, Kagome. See how your body reacts,"

 _Why do you do this?_

Kagome shook her head, her sobs like a little girl desperately wanting to be heard,

 _You say you love me,_

 _you say it over and over again... but why..._

He wiped the tears away from her cheeks. She stiffened as his fingers gained a faster rhythm inside her, his digits plunging in and out of her slick folds. She shook, from the unwanted heat rising in her core, as his thumb found that little nub on the apex of her womanhood, and he rubbed on it, his fingers slippery with her fluids.

She felt electricity run from his hands, directly shooting through her spine.

"Stop... please, not like this, Sesshomaru please!" she whimpered like a wounded animal, but he wouldn't listen.

 _Why do you do this?_

 _You say you love me... but if you really did,_

 _You wouldn't hurt me like this!_

And Kagome moaned, as she felt herself reach shattering heights, and her muscles clamped down on his fingers as she climaxed, a heavy substance spilling out of her, soaking his hands, soaking her ripped, bloody bloomers. It dripped on the floor, and he pulled her into an embrace.

"Kagome," he whispered madly, "two more days." He pulled his hand out from her slit, and he stroked her hair, trying to comfort her sobs,

he dared to kiss her lips.

 _I'm confused,_

 _and my body is sore all over, I feel so alone..._

 _Sesshomaru, you could have at least been gentle,_

Kagome could only lean on him, and she cried. She cried her heart out, and Sesshomaru was whispering sweet nothings to her, covering her with his jacket, as she sobbed like a little child in his arms.

 _I can't trust anyone..._

 _Mama..._

 _why did you leave me by myself?_

* * *

In the empty playground, Kagome stood from the swing she had been sitting on as she scanned the gloomy afternoon sky. She had to head home pretty soon, or else rain would fall. She had not brought her umbrella with her.

Kagome straightened her skirt and slung her bag over her shoulder as she started the walk.

Sesshomaru had an important meet with the Taekwondo team, and it took an awful amount of persuasion not to let him cancel it just to walk her home.

Just as she stepped into the pavement, she bumped into someone.

Her bag fell on the floor, the contents spilling on the ground. "Sorry," she heard him say.

 _Kagome, you klutz, bumping into a lot of people lately-_

She was exhausted. She did not even bother to lift her eyes up, as she knelt down and collected her spilled things. The student, she could tell by his uniform, knelt on one knee and helped her retrieve her scattered belongings: miscellaneous papers, and her torn, bloodied gym clothes.

His hand hovered over her flight ticket, and he paused.

Kagome snatched the ticket away. The wounds on her arms were still raw and red from Sesshomaru's outburst, and she quickly hid it, not wanting anyone to see.

"Thanks," she mumbled, as she turned and ran, leaving the student alone in the empty playground, the harsh wind of the upcoming storm blowing his long, raven hair.

* * *

"Naraku," a newcomer said, and the student turned around and stood up.

"Kagura," he answered, and he watched as his mate's eyes followed the girl's receding form.

"Isn't that Sesshomaru's girl?" she said, and he shifted his gaze towards the Third Year. The look on his eyes softened.

He recalled her ripped, bloodied clothes, and the fresh lacerations on her arms, the bruise marks all over her skin. "Kagura, I'm afraid he'll break her even before he gets the chance to win her back."

Kagura followed his gaze. "He's too traumatized from losing her, he doesn't realize he's hurting the girl," she answered.

He ran his fingers through his unbound hair. "I would be," he said,

"I would have gone mad, too, if I lost you."

They fell silent for long moments, and Naraku took his jacket off, covering his mate protectively from the strong gust. "I'm leaving tonight, I have something to settle in Shibuya."

"Naraku,"

"She's too confused and lost, and he's too desperate and blinded. They're not helping each other. If this goes on any further, he will lose her completely." He took out his phone and typed a message to his driver. He hit send. "I saw a plane ticket to Chicago, Kagura. She's leaving him on Saturday. Tomorrow's her last day with him."

Kagura's eyes subtly widened.

"I have to go to Shibuya. I have to talk to Kagome's cousin... That Kikyo girl, she's been too quiet, she might hold some answers. She might shed some light on us, most especially to her." He paused. "As ironic as it may sound, Kagome's affection is the only thing that can bring his sanity back."

"I'll go with you," Kagura said, "If it's to stop Sesshomaru's girl from leaving... I don't want to find him as we did the first time we met him. Who knows, this time,

we won't be able to stop him if he decides to take his own life again."

Naraku nodded, and Kagura reached out, and he took her hand.


	7. Stowed Memories

_**A/N:**_ I will put this here at the start so as not to destroy the mood later. After this chapter is a transition with Naraku's perspective, so don't be surprised at the sudden shift. Its only gonna be a good one or two chapters. Have a nice weekend. :)

* * *

 _ **Stowed Memories**_

* * *

 _They say it takes an awful lot for a Daiyoukai to lose control of his beast..._

She leaned her head on the table and stared at the sleeping Sesshomaru in front of her. He was not waiting for her by her classroom doorway as usual for recess, so she decided to go up to him instead. And indeed, she found him in his classroom, alone, and asleep.

 _They would have to go through unthinkable duress before they truly snap._

Kagome slowly reached out and tucked aside a strand of hair that fell across his face. Her hand lingered, as she stared at his exhausted features.

 _Yesterday_ , y _ou snapped._

She recalled his desperate scream, his unforgiving touch, and how his eyes burned red the whole time during the attack.

 _Your will was already fraying, and something happened that overwhelmed you to the point that you finally broke._

Last night, when she was packing her stuff, she noticed there had been a rose slipped into her school bag. She knew who it was from, but she realized the only time he could have done this was when she was away for Physical Education class.

 _You found out yesterday, didn't you?_

The ticket was not where it was supposed to be. Kagome had tucked it in between her small notebook, she remembered it sticking out and folded at the edges. When she bumped into that student yesterday, it couldn't have just spilled out loose like that.

 _You found out I was leaving you..._

 _and Kouga-sensei was just your last trigger before you finally lost yourself._

Her hands ran through the length of his long, platinum-white hair, and she absently repeated the motion, stroking it softly like she would a little child. She did not notice long lashes fluttering open, and golden eyes softly rousing.

 _You are breaking me, Sesshomaru... slowly breaking me..._

 _And it seems,_

 _That I have been slowly breaking you too._

Kagome pushed his bangs away with the palm of her hand. She leaned over and gently pressed her lips to his forehead. It was her apology, the only thing she can do for having caused him pain. She did not see, but golden eyes were quietly watching her the whole time.

 _Both of us are hurting each other immensely... I can't let this go on. I have to leave. If I don't, we will end up destroying each other to the point that we become_

 _unfixable._

When she pulled away, a familiar grip caught her wrist, and her eyes darted to him. He was awake, for how long she did not know. There was no dead mask, no desperation. His pupils were dilated and focused on her, like a lost child who had just found his way home, and his gaze never left. She could see her own reflection looking back through his eyes.

"Did you wait long?" he said quietly, and she shook her head.

"Kagome," he finally said, and he slowly leaned forward, pushed her hair aside and planted his lips softly on her head, mirroring what she did earlier.

She closed her eyes. She did not want to see the hope that burned in him.

 _What if I did not meet your desperation with the same level of anger?_

 _What would have happened? Both of us..._

 _were always caught up in the moment,_

 _screaming at each other, and never really listening._

He sat up and embraced her. As she leaned unresisting in his warmth she could feel his heartbeat, it was drumming loud fast, as she pressed her ears on his warm chest. "Kagome," he repeated, as if her name held all the answers, as if it could heal all that had been done. He leaned his forehead against hers. He dipped down and gently caught her lips.

She felt his heart race even faster when she wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him close, and the girl felt him smile when she finally kissed back.

 _Today, I will try to treat you with the same tenderness,_

 _Today will be my apology._

She knew, from underneath her school jacket, the bruises and red lacerations on her arms.

 _I'm sorry, Sesshomaru,_

 _But I have to leave... to save both of us._

* * *

Kagome waited at the corner as the students poured out of his classroom for dismissal with a heavy blush tainted on her cheeks. She recalled what happened earlier during lunch, as they kissed in the empty classroom.

 _-She opened her mouth to invite his tongue in, and he paused for a while before she heard him take a sharp intake of breath and whispered her name. His tongue snaked in, and she sighed, surprised by the pleasant feeling as this time, it was not mixed with blood and tears. His hand raked through her hair, and the free one traveled down her spine. He cupped her bottom and with one swift move he lifted her up towards him._

 _She found herself straddled on his lap, and the hand that sifted through her hair traveled her body, squeezing her curves, and he sneaked into the gap of her uniform. Her hold to him tightened as his hands stroke the bare skin of her back._

 _They pulled each other closer, her breasts pressed on his chest, her back arching as his hands stroked her heating skin. His kisses were growing more demanding, and he gasped as she involuntarily moaned, when he pushed her down his hips, letting her feel his hard arousal._

 _Someone suddenly cleared his throat, and the two turned towards the doorway. Their old, conservative professor was glaring at them by the entrance._

"Kagome," he said, and she looked up. The blush was still heavy on her cheeks. "Have you been waiting for me?"

She nodded quietly, and she tiptoed from her position to greet him with a soft kiss on his cheek. She pulled away, and they stood across each other for long moments.

* * *

Sesshomaru immediately canceled his Taekwondo meet just to walk her home. They were silent, and the whole time, the Inuyoukai held her hand, and he never really let go.

"Where are your friends?" She asked, busying herself with the roses on her free hand, absently plucking the petals just to have an excuse from looking at him. They sat under a sheltering tree, beneath the raincloud-riddled sky, and she released the blood-red petals into the wind.

She shifted, as Sesshomaru rested his chin gently on top of her head. They were seated on the grass, she was positioned between his lap, and he pulled her closer, nuzzling his nose to the crook of her neck, burying his face in her hair. The people that passed by blushed at the inuyoukai's blatant display of affection.

"Somewhere," he said, "They didn't tell me. But it doesn't matter...

You're here."

"Hmm," she replied, and thunder rumbled from the sky. Kagome shuddered from the chill, and he quickly took off his jacket to wrap her with it when a strong gust pulled it off from his grasp.

"Ah!" she exclaimed as she unwittingly bolted up and chased after it. The Inuyoukai closely followed, dragging their bags with him, and a heavy rain finally started to pour. It soaked their uniform-clad selves in an instant, and they finally stopped under an abandoned store.

His jacket was tangled in one of the posts, and when Kagome had finally recovered it, she realized there was a significant rip by the arm. "Oh," she murmured, "Gomen... I'll try to sew this up tonight-" she stopped and paled. She realized she had just made a promise to him, one that she could not fulfill.

Today was her last day with him.

She did not know how to take her words back. Sesshomaru pulled her wet form against him, his face hidden at the soft of her waist. "You'll do that for me?" he said, and Kagome kept silent.

She bit her lip.

The thought that she was leaving him to face his desperation alone left her feeling conflicted and torn. She saw him smile, his eyes full of hope, and it crushed her heart.

"Thank you," he murmured, and he pulled her closer, burying his face in her wet shirt.

 _I'm sorry, Sesshomaru..._

His wet form soaked her shirt even more, and Kagome absently took his jacket and wiped his hair. He remained still as she continued her quiet ministrations. Suddenly he shifted, and he wrapped his arms around her.

"I wish this day would never end," he suddenly said, his head still cast down. "I love you, Kagome," he whispered, and she felt little drops of water soak her shirt.

Just like on the train, when she felt those little drops fall on her back, she kept very still, a soft look conflicting in her eyes.

She knew it was not from his hair, because just like the last time, it had already dried.

* * *

The rain was thrumming heavily outside, and she stared at the little screen in front of her. Another barrage of unanswered text messages, all from the Inuyoukai.

 _-Did you have dinner?-_

 _-Keep yourself warm.-_

 _-Tomorrow is a big day, my little Shrine Girl.-_

Kagome held his torn jacket tight, as a new message from him appeared.

 _-Can I call you?-_

Slowly, the girl pressed reply, and she typed in her answer: -Yes.-

Not a minute he let pass by as her phone rang, and she picked up. "Kagome," he said from the other line, his voice warm and reassuring in the cold, rainy night. "Were you busy?"

She laid on the bed, her eyes on the raindrops that were hitting her window. "No."

"I'm glad. Then were you preparing to get to sleep?"

A long silence followed until she finally answered. "Not really,"

"Oh," he merely answered, and he fell silent on the other line himself. She listened to the steady hum on his side of the line.

"Is it..." she started, as she heard him take a sharp intake of breath when she spoke, "Is it raining heavily there?"

"Yes," he said, "It's raining here too. It gives me a little bit of comfort," he continued, "to be thinking that we are underneath one sky."

Kagome then turned, towards the dark corner of her room. Her luggage was packed and ready for tomorrow.

"Me too," she quietly answered, and she could hear, from the other line, a soft sniffling. She tried to control her tears, she knew what was happening at the other end.

"Tomorrow," he reminded her. "Kagome, I can't wait for tomorrow."

There it was, that crushing guilt that gnawed at her conscience. What was she to say?

"Goodnight, Sesshomaru," she finally settled, and he let out an exhausted sigh.

"I love you, Kagome. Please listen,

because I want you to know this,

because I need you to always remember. I love you."

Kagome hung up the phone because she could not control her tears. In a mere five days, with all that was said and done, the girl finally admitted to herself: It was hard to leave. But she tried to steel her resolve, as she stared at the ticket to Chicago that lay on her desk.

Her phone suddenly rang- and she stared at the screen for the caller-

It was an unknown number, and she hesitatingly answered.

"Kagome," the female from the other line said, and Kagome's eyes widened subtly. She recognized that voice. "I'm headed to your Shrine in Bunkyo."

It was Kikyo. "Please, meet me there soon as possible. I have something important to tell you."

Kagome bolted up from her bed, not even bothering to change her Yukata. She grabbed some pocket money with her and ran outside, leaving everything else behind.

* * *

She arrived at the unfamiliar Shrine, out of breath from the thousand steps and soaked to the bone. New flashbacks began haunting her mind, every little thing creating little triggers for her gaps in memory. She stood under the rain, the shade of the Goshinboku not enough to shield her from the downpour. She leaned on the hidden side of the tree to catch her breath when something met her touch.

In the dim of the rainy night, she realized there was something carved on the trunk, and she blindly ran her fingers through it: _S & K,_ inside a small heart.

The carve was etched so deep it looked as if it had been redone over and over through the years.

Suddenly, she was sucked into a small flashback of her in pitch-black darkness, and she felt the familiar feeling of a hand holding hers as it guided her through the outline of the carved initials. Kagome withdrew, reeling from the sudden memory.

She turned around and saw Kikyo. She was holding a large, heavy box, and her cousin's eyes were all red and puffy from crying.

"I'm sorry... for keeping this from you. I was too scared of your father to tell you, but your mate's friends, they came to the house last night... they told me everything,

Kagome, I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, I didn't know,"

* * *

Kagome barged into the empty house, dashing into her room, the heavy box in tow. When she reached her door, the box that Kikyo gave her spilled open, and the contents scattered on the floor: an avalanche of pictures, of her and Sesshomaru, some very old and some very new. The older ones were in black and white, when technology was undeveloped. They were little children, standing beside each other, smiling under happier times. And time was chronicled, preserved carefully through the pictures, up to a more modern colored film, of her and him, all grown up, still standing closely beside each other, never really separated throughout the years.

Kagome closed her eyes. She remembered snippets, little blows of intense memories, and she pushed the large chest she used in the middle of her room. She was still trying to fight the tears off when she found what she was looking for:

 _Images of her in a full Miko garb flashed in her mind, as she was scratching a desperate message for him on the wooden floor with her bloodied hands._

Her tears finally fell as she read her writing.

Everything was still foggy and mixed up, but she was starting to remember.

"This was my last message to Sesshomaru," Kagome said, "Before father tried to repress all my memories and replace it with yours."

Kikyo was quietly watching her, when she bent down to pick up a DVD on the scattered pile. It was labeled _ **Yuinou**_ , and Kikyo loaded the disk into the player.

When the images appeared, a whimper escaped Kagome's lips as she to stifle her moans.

" _That one is called Kin," Kagome said brightly. She was garbed in a formal kimono, her unfocused blue eyes to the camera. Someone giggled from behind the recording, and Kagome frowned. "What?"_

" _You're pointing to the wrong thing," Kikyo teased,_

" _Well, sorry. I'm still as blind as a bat." Kagome frowned, and another hand reached out to her. The camera zoomed out, Sesshomaru was sitting beside her, smiling. His free hand guided her towards the package in the middle._

" _This one is Kin," he explained, until Kagome swatted at him playfully._

" _Hey, I'm the narrator here." She turned to the camera. "The groom is supposed to give the bride a ton of money," Kagome said, "Hopefully Sesshomaru-sama brought a boatload of it, so we won't have a problem with that." Kikyo giggled from behind._

" _How about that one?"_

 _The camera's view then shifted to another package, blurring as the focus was brought back to Kagome. "This one's called Tomo... tomo... shiraya?" Kagome answered, and Sesshomaru's voice drifted into the video._

" _Shiraga," he corrected, and Kagome nodded._

" _Tomoshiraga," she continued, "Tomo means together, Shiraga means White Hair." She tightened her hold on Sesshomaru's hand, and she smiled softly. "so that Sesshomaru-sama and I can live together until we grow old..."_

Kagome stared at the video of herself, and she felt Kikyo's supportive hand rest on her shoulder.

The camera cut into a different scene. They still had formal Kimonos donned, but Kagome's hair was undone. It was apparent that the Yuinou was over, and Sesshomaru was slumped on a table, exhausted and asleep. The video blurred for a while as Kagome put a finger to her lips in a quiet "Ssshh,"

" _You mean he has never said those three words to you ever? You've known him since you were born! And that was what, a hundred and fifty years ago?" Kikyo whispered, and Kagome looked at his sleeping form fondly._

 _"A hundred and forty-eight," She corrected. "No, he's quite the shy one. As you've noticed he never puts up any verbal or physical display when other people are around. But he doesn't need to... I know he loves me, and I trust him." Kagome ran her hand tenderly through his hair, careful not to wake him._

" _Ehhh, but still, wouldn't it be nice for him to display a little bit of affection?"_

" _Yes, I admit, it would be nice for him to do so..." Kagome said,_

" _And I will be waiting, Kikyo, until the time comes when he won't be embarrassed to hold my hand, won't be too shy to say those three words to me out loud._

 _But for now, as long as I have the speech, I will be the one to tell him._

 _And I'll never be ashamed to tell this to him again and again,_

 _because I want him to know this,_

 _because he needs to always remember."_

 _She leaned down and brushed his bangs away from his forehead, and she planted a soft kiss on his cheek._

" _I love you, Sesshomaru." she whispered, "I love you." And the video finally faded into black._


	8. The Empty Shell

_**A/N:**_ Please read this from Naraku's standpoint, this goes back four years ago as they started their first year. _This will only be two chapters,_ so please be patient. These parts (especially the party, when the scandal happened,) I think will be best explained through someone else's eyes. Then we'll finally shift to Sesshomaru's perspective, to where it all began. Just to remind you, they are one year level more than Kagome.

I'm bracing myself, for those who are hating Sesshomaru right now in this story. Let's start.

* * *

 _ **-Part II- There's Something About Her-**_

* * *

 _ **The Empty Shell**_

* * *

 _***First Year****_

 _ **-Naraku-**_

 _I had always thought, that once I had the level of power_

 _such as a Daiyoukai would have, I would not want to ask for anything more._

The raven-haired freshman sat still on the cold, uncomfortable metal chair, the white curtains fluttering gently from the wind that entered the open window. A roomful of bright flowers, expensive art on the walls, sealed packages from extravagant family members- still it could not hide the stench of bleach that permeated through the hospital room, it could not mask the emptiness of the large suite.

The wind chimes that rang like distant bells did not drown out the beeps of the equipment, balloons that floated weightlessly on the air, with messages of 'get well soon,' could not erase what Naraku had just witnessed earlier.

He could recall, as crisp as the day- the sound of electrical charging and the shocks delivered to the paddle, as they attempted to revive the Daiyoukai's heart when it spasmed madly into Ventricular Fibrillation,

and he could hear the disturbing gagging sound, when they forced his jaw open and shoved the tube down his airway, driving in the oxygen into his failed lungs.

The white-haired Daiyoukai now lay sleeping before him, recently extubated, various wires and electrodes stuck on his body, feeding his vital statistics to the monitors before him.

 _I realized, in this world where humans and youkai strive to live peacefully,_

 _I do not need such power._

The morning started as ordinary, fairly annoying in hindsight. As far as he could recall it was supposed to be a non-eventful, dull "first day of high school." He was only coerced by his father-in-law to attend the program. He needed the formality so he can legally take over their business.

At least the presence of his mate beside him, ranting through how pointless this part of the treaty was, had got him through most of the morning.

They cut class during their first period. Kagura thought it was funny. He thought it was all juvenile and ridiculous, but he couldn't say no to his mate. And so, in between their childish antics, he decided to take an untimely bathroom break.

But when he entered the men's bathroom that morning, he saw the Taisho heir by the sink, before a running faucet, drinking down the last drop of a certain liquid. Naraku's eyes traveled downward-

Bottles and bottles of the unknown item-

it was when the Inuyoukai staggered back and started throwing up blood did he realize what the liquid was.

Unadulterated poison.

 _For a powerful being such as you, who has everything he could wish for,_

 _What made you lose all hope?_

The vitals started picking up, and slowly, prized golden eyes exclusive to the Inuyoukai lineage opened. Naraku watched as the Taisho heir's gaze darted around, slowly regaining consciousness, drowning in confusion, until his eyes glazed over.

He finally realized where he was, and immediately, a torrent of emotions flooded his golden eyes.

Tears spilled down the heir's cheeks, as he lay inside his own tortured mind, staring at the emptily at the ceiling. He whispered something inaudible, and Naraku's gaze softened.

 _What happened? You are supposed to be a stubborn being_

 _full of pride,_

Nurses rushed to the bedside, swamping the inuyoukai's flaccid form. Naraku could only cast his eyes down, deeply troubled. He knew what was missing in the youkai's eyes-

 _Now, you are a mere empty shell..._

 _Daiyoukai, what did you lose_

 _for you to give up like this?_

* * *

 _****Second Year****_

"Sesshomaru, ready for lunch?" Naraku asked the quiet Daiyoukai, and his friend absently nodded as he followed him and his mate outside the small confines of their classroom. Kagura held on to her mate's hand and gave Sesshomaru a teasing smile,

"You're in for a treat today. Naraku made me do our bento this time, you lucky guys get to see a world-renowned chef in the making."

Naraku cringed at his mate's misplaced pride. As he was instructing her step by step last night, he saw her sneak in a hefty amount of salt into the rice. He knew she had a knack for all things salty, but he also knew she would go overboard, _most of the time._

He silently hoped Sesshomaru was ready to have some Onigiri that tasted like the Dead Sea. As they sat beneath one of the outdoor patios, a flock of first-year students passed by, all throwing secret glances to their white-haired friend who sat in the middle. The girls did not even try to hide their blush and repress their giggles.

Their friend only sat there, quiet and empty as he had always been. A soft summer wind blew against their forms, and Naraku could see, from his pathetic stolen observations, the inuyoukai's eyes flicker with a certain emotion.

Sesshomaru turned towards the direction of the wind, and a profound longing surfaced from his soul, veiled lightly in his eyes.

 _There is something in the summer wind_

 _that brings out these little flickers of emotion from this empty shell of a person._

 _I wonder what it is._

As the breeze died down, his eyes glazed over, melting back into that strange, empty mask that Naraku had always seen since the day he woke up in the hospital.

Naraku watched as Sesshomaru took a bite of the Onigiri. He held no reaction, and so he decided to take a bite of his wife's masterpiece himself.

He instantly bit his tongue to hold the barrage of curses that threatened to spill out. His mate was watching him expectantly with wide eyes, and he forced a smile from his burning mouth. Yes, it was that salty he felt as if his tongue shriveled up and died.

Kagura suddenly laughed, and she sprang forward and engulfed him in a fond hug. "Naraku, you dolt! You don't have to lie just to make me happy!" he stiffened when she giggled, "I purposely put too much salt in that batch just to see how you'd react." She took one rice ball from Sesshomaru's batch and hovered it before his mouth. "Here, taste it."

Naraku took a bite, and he heaved a sigh of relief. It tasted normal this time, and Kagura smiled at him proudly. Someone suddenly cleared her throat from behind, and the group turned around to see a cute little human, very pretty, with her head bowed very low, and a heavy blush on her cheeks.

"Uhm, I know this is such an inconvenient time, but can I... can I speak to Sesshomaru-sama? I have something important to tell him."

Golden eyes shifted from the girl to his companions, the hollow expression on his face never changing. "Please excuse me." He said almost mechanically, as he stood up and the two disappeared into the garden.

Kagura turned to Naraku, and he sighed.

"Another confession from a hopeful, and yet another rejection from the empty doll."

"Sometimes it makes me wonder if he still feels any emotions at all," Kagura muttered, and Naraku leaned over to clean up the leftovers.

"I don't know," he answered. "It's been a year now, and no one is saying anything to us."

He and his mate stuck beside the golden-eyed heir, quietly watching over him, trying to bring companionship to his solitary world. It started when Touga Taisho had spoken to them the day his son woke up at the hospital. And of course, Naraku asked, and Touga had only replied with a heavy three words,

 _"He lost something."_

Touga made a quiet plea to him and his mate, to stay beside his son while at school, and watch for his safety. Naraku found out it was not such a hard task. The Taisho heir was not at all hard to watch:

Because Sesshomaru would move along his days like a soulless doll, a mechanical marionette, never really engaging in anything anymore.

His detachment was so bad it came to the point that his classmates had created fantasies over his mysterious, brooding personality, and Naraku would chuckle to his mate Kagura, from the silliness of his friend's made-up identity: a stoic, _romance-novel_ like prince, ready to sweep the lucky woman off her feet.

As far as he knew, there was no sweet guy behind the "stoic yet beautiful mask". There was no "possessive, passionate youkai" behind those dead golden eyes. If he and Kagura had tried to shake the Daiyoukai's brains out just to see a spark of life, at least a mere indication of his soul, they would have already done so.

And so far, being with him until the second year of the program, they had managed to get him to talk to them about trivial things, at the very least. And there was Sesshomaru's involvement in the Taekwondo team.

Naraku hung his head in defeat, feeling like an old man desperately trying to boost his son's social life.

A scuffle from behind and the couple turned around. Kagura stood as she met their golden-eyed friend halfway. "So?"

"Let's stop by the Sakura trees on our way." Sesshomaru answered.

"Another reject?" Kagura probed, ignoring his change of topic. Sesshomaru picked up his belongings, and he nodded his head.

"Maybe that's what is missing, you idiot. Maybe you just need a decent fuck or something,"

"Kagura," Naraku warned, but his mate shook her head.

"Sorry. Sesshomaru, did you at least know her name? So that I can add her to the long list of vengeful rejects that would most probably start spreading rumors about you?" She added sarcastically.

Sesshomaru shook his head, unaffected by her blunt words. His soulless expression was there as usual, and Naraku then fell silent.

If there was one thing he could say about the detached youkai beside him, it was that he never remembered names.

Kagura had always taken that one detail as a big deal. She had said that his not remembering names was from a conscious understanding, that he never bothered to remember because attachments and relationships were of no use and unimportant.

Kagura said the Daiyoukai was only probably viewing himself as transient- to only live for a short time,

and that he would be attempting something else pretty soon.

That kept Naraku to be feeling as if he was constantly walking on eggshells. Kagura was right. Sesshomaru had been doing such activities, being captain of the Taekwondo team, talking to people.

But it was still so clear that Sesshomaru had already given up on living.

So he would have probably thought of another plan, and now have the actual strength to carry it through.

And so as the start of Second Year came, Naraku braced himself for what was to come. He was expecting Sesshomaru to slip quietly out of their sights if given a chance, and so they never left his side.

But he did not expect for things to take a complete turnaround when they reached the Sakura trees by the gates of the school, that warm summer day.

* * *

He felt a sharp pull to his sleeve, and he abruptly halted. "Look," Kagura motioned, and Naraku's gaze shifted to the Inuyoukai standing beside him.

It was as if their friend was suspended in time.

"It can't be," Sesshomaru barely whispered.

Instead of an empty shell, he saw probably every fucking emotion flicker in the heir's once dead, golden eyes, and Naraku stood there, more frozen than the thawing soul before him. Kagura tugged at him again, and she pointed to where Sesshomaru's eyes zeroed in:

A girl, dressed in the most unflattering of clothes, was standing underneath a cherry blossom tree. She was holding her hand out to catch the falling petals, and a soft smile played on her lips. Her black hair was swept up into a bun, and her thick-rimmed glasses obliterated whatever appeal she had.

But he could see, behind her old-lady appearance,

eternally youthful blue eyes, as blue as the sky above them.

"I know her," Kagura stepped forward, "I bumped into her during the opening ceremony. Innocent little first year..." Kagura struggled to remember. " Her name... it was linked to a string of family-owned shrines,"

Kagura paused. "Higurashi... hmmph...

Higurashi..."

 _Useless,_ Naraku thought. Sesshomaru never knew her, and even if he did, he would never remember her name.

But the Daiyoukai shifted.

His hands twitched, and his eyes were an overflow of emotions Naraku couldn't believe was even possible for someone to hold in one moment. It passed from despair, to panic and confusion, and Naraku heard his friend's breathing growing erratic in his internal turmoil.

The emotions on the heir's eyes finally spilled into his face, and the empty mask, for the first time in a very long time, dissolved. It was replaced by a torrent of shameless tears, the only time Naraku saw him cry again since he woke up in the hospital.

He watched him as he opened his mouth, struggling to find his words, until finally he spoke:

"Kagome," Sesshomaru trembled, and he found movement in his stiffened body. With his muscles coiling to life he sprung towards the girl underneath the Sakura tree.

Naraku and Kagura turned to look at each other, slackjawed. A hand suddenly rested on their shoulders, and they turned to the newcomer. It was their balding homeroom teacher, and he held a look of consternation on his face.

"Eh, Sensei, nice to see you at lunch hour," Naraku greeted, trying to be as casual as he can. The teacher's eyes flashed menacingly.

"Lunch hour was over five minutes ago. Were you planning to cut class again?"

Kagura suddenly shrieked, the painful high pitch making them grimace. She pulled the teacher away from the direction of the Sakura trees, back towards the building. "Ahhh! Gomen, we didn't notice!" She turned back to Naraku, her brows furrowed and motioning him to follow. Naraku instantly realized her distraction ploy, and he grinned at her proudly in appreciation.

With one last look behind him, Naraku watched as their friend's form approached the unsuspecting girl.

 _So he does remember names,_

 _he does experience emotions._

 _And he still has life, somewhere in those dead golden eyes._

He spun back around to see his mate practically dragging the poor teacher with her towards the school. He grinned, ever so thankful for her in his life, and his thoughts drifted back to their golden-eyed friend.

 _I am so lucky, to have my girl beside me._

 _And for you, is she your chosen one?_

 _I wish you all the best._

 _Kagura and I_

 _will be right beside you all the way, Daiyoukai._


	9. The One Left Behind

_**The One Left Behind**_

* * *

 _There is something about her_

 _that draws out his deepest emotions,_

Naraku paused as they stopped yet again when the blue-eyed shrine girl passed them by. She did not notice them, but one thing was for sure- their golden-eyed friend did,

and he saw their quiet friend drop everything he was doing to follow his gaze on her, his hands clenching in intense restraint from reaching out. She was finally out of sight, and Naraku shifted his gaze back towards Sesshomaru.

The longing in his friend's golden eyes was there, still burning brightly he had to look away.

 _I know that feeling, Daiyoukai._

 _Why don't you just go to her? What's keeping you from courting her?_

 _Why are you so scared?_

They had asked him, the day after they saw her underneath the sakura tree. He had disappeared that afternoon without any word, and concerned, they called Touga to report his missing son. Surprisingly Touga answered, and assured him and his mate that Sesshomaru was alright- he had gone home early that afternoon, and they said they were currently in Bunkyo.

What they were doing there so abruptly had puzzled Naraku to no end, but Kagura just shrugged her pretty shoulders at him. _"Who knows. They're richer than us. They might have some business there, you nosy urchin."_

And Naraku did not know if their having met the Shrine Girl was a good or a bad thing. Sesshomaru was not wearing that dead mask anymore, but it was replaced by a tortured, anguished soul, whose eyes were burning with regret and longing.

Kagura had tried to set him up with the shrine girl for countless of times, but he would refuse in panic.

 _**"I can't go near her," Sesshomaru answered cryptically, from which Naraku raised a vain brow at him._

" _What," the hanyou asked in disbelief, "Your 'legs go weak' or something? She's just a girl, for fuck's sake! Just go near her and say HI." He shook his head, "I can't believe the almighty Daiyoukai is acting like a wee little lamb-"_

 _"I can't go near her," Sesshomaru repeated, the anguish in his voice leaking through. Naraku sat quiet, as golden eyes connected with his. "I have to wait... until she is ready,_

 _until she comes to me."**_

Naraku wanted to shake some sense into the heir before him.

 _What a traditional idiot._

If he would just have approached the girl, it would have saved them a lot of teeth-grinding angst. Then Sesshomaru wouldn't look like a pathetic stalker he was efficiently playing right now. He could remember the incident in the gym, when they happened to be in the inner court playing basketball, and the first years had Physical Education in the track field.

Sesshomaru was standing by the pillar, staring quietly at a group in the field. Naraku took off his shirt and threw it to Sesshomaru, trying to divert the audience he had unknowingly collected.

Apparently, his friend was sporting a massive _boner_ underneath his loose shorts.

The girls on their level stood in envy at the flock of first years he was supposedly watching.

To the unknowing eye, the Taisho heir was being turned on by those group of wolf youkai standing by the corner, but Naraku knew better, as he approached Sesshomaru's unmoving form.

The inuyoukai was staring at the innocuous little Shrine Girl.

She was oblivious to his heated gaze, as sweat ran down her temples and she ran away from the group. She hid in a corner to adjust the tight bloomers that were bunching in her ass, unaware of the scorching stare the Daiyoukai held towards her. Sesshomaru was so absorbed with the trail of her fingers on her wet skin,

her breaths coming out in small gasps from the heat of the day,

he did not notice there was a world outside of his erotic Shrine Girl fantasies until Naraku took his neglected shirt off the floor and slapped Sesshomaru's back, trying to knock some dignity back into the very smitten, and very aroused, youkai.

Of course, it sparked another round of unfounded rumors about his friend's "insatiable lust," but Sesshomaru simply did not care, and so he and Kagura didn't either. Naraku had been worried, as Kagura started to get impatient. And when his mate was impatient, he knew that there was no stopping her.

He knew his mate was going to make another move, and she did indeed when they reached the middle of the school year.

There was a party to be held at one of the student's large house, and all the popular people were invited. Kagura leaned over, to tell him of her plan.

* * *

The shrine girl won't be invited. That they were sure of, because of one brutal reason-

she was not popular.

"I'll get him drunk into a stupor until his beast will be teetering on edge," Kagura said, holding a bottle of whiskey laced with heavy _inebriating poison_ in it. "We'll tell him we have a challenge for him..."

Naraku raised a questioning brow. "A challenge? " He saw Kagura smile, and Naraku glared at his mate. "Are you out of your mind? You know he'll never agree to that, Kagura."

"That's the point, you idiot," Kagura said as she shook the bottle in her hands, as they made their way up in the room where Sesshomaru was in.

"He'll never agree to it. The plan is simple and blunt. We'll bring with us one of those desperate wolves in front of him, and his beast will be frustrated. He'll reject the girl and our plan, get a heavy scolding from his inner self, and probably give that retard the courage he needs to come up to that harmless little shrine girl and _at least say HELLO._ " Kagura finished her sentence with an audible, frustrated huff.

Naraku paused as they entered the door, and Sesshomaru's golden eyes met them, unaware of the outline they had formulated.

The hanyou shook his head.

It was a harmless plan, compared to the past attempts they made to prod the idiot to the girl. Naraku closed the door behind him, as Kagura sat before their friend and watched him drink the first shot she poured from the bottle-

and Sesshomaru's eyes immediately glazed over, the inebriating spell instantly hitting his usual heavyweight self.

Naraku leaned on the couch, trying to relax.

 _Surely, nothing could go wrong._

* * *

They had not prepared for the consequences of their harmless little plan. When Naraku opened the doors to bring in one of those wolf-youkai females, he was not ready for what met his eyes.

Sesshomaru's shrine girl was there.

To top it all off, she was straddling him in a very compromising position. The fact that they were _together_ , in such an intimate situation had completely drowned out the fact that their friend was covered in her puke. The hanyou looked beside him, as he watched his mate's lips twitch upwards, the beginnings of a smile of victory cracking through her shocked face.

But it all changed when the wolf-youkai beside them just had to open her mouth and ruin the somehow precious moment.

"Oh my gosh. I have GOT to Instagram this!"

A camera flash filled the dim room, and that was all it took for Sesshomaru's eyes to flood into blood red. He instantly bared his fangs as his muscled coiled tightly in a reflexive warning, his arms protectively winding around the sleeping girl.

"Delete that picture, now!" Naraku instantly spun around, holding the wolf-youkai by the shoulders, slamming the terrified freshman harshly on the wall.

Naraku's eyes himself was teetering on the verge of red in intense anger.

The girl started to cry, as her hands fumbled pathetically on her phone. Kagura stepped in front of her mate, in between the angered Daiyoukai, bracing herself from the inevitable attack that was to come. She bared her fangs and let out a protective warning of her own.

But the rage in his aura suddenly died down, when the sleeping Shrine Girl, who was still in Sesshomaru's arms- braced her palms across his chest.

That simple action acted like a douse of cold water for the raging Inuyoukai.

His eyes melted back to gold. The Shrine Girl nuzzled her cheek across his puke-covered chest and whispered calmly in her somnolence, _"Sesshomaru-sama."_

"What are you dallying for?" Naraku shook the girl who was still madly pressing the buttons on her phone. His fangs were starting to grow, and he grabbed her phone and smashed it into the wall. The device broke into pieces as it fell to the floor, the blood on Naraku's hands staining the wall, dripping down the carpet in great amounts.

"Leave," he warned, as the stubborn wolf dared to glare at him, the powerful, centuries-old hanyou that stood before her. Another hand shot out from behind him and grabbed the girl, yanking her roughly away from his escalating rage. It was Kagura.

"He said leave," she said through clenched teeth, equally holding back in restraint. She threw her out of the room and slammed the door shut.

Kagura rushed to her mate and took his bloodied hand, tending to it in comfort when they heard a soft sniffling from behind them. They turned around, and the adrenaline that had built up for the past moments suddenly dissolved into thin air.

It was heartbreaking. The Daiyoukai was lurched on his stomach, bent down and in tears as he held the sleeping shrine girl in his arms. He was sobbing as he buried his face in her hair, shaking his head, and his hands gripped her so tight it was bound to leave bruise marks on her skin. "Kagome," he whispered, taking her hand and running it tenderly across the outline of his face. It was then that Naraku realized.

That inaudible word Sesshomaru whispered, the moment he woke up from the hospital-

it was her name.

 _The way you hold her,_

 _the way you say her name... your abnormal devotion to this girl,_

 _I have long wondered about this, but now I can definitely say for sure._

 _Something else is going on._

They stood quietly on the corner, and Kagura's hand held his. She looked at him, a silent acknowledgment of his thoughts.

 _There's something about her_

 _that you haven't been telling us,_

 _And it is getting frustrating, Dayoukai,_

 _for you to be keeping us in the dark._

* * *

She left.

The day after the party happened, the Shrine Girl slipped away from his sights. He almost had her in his grasp, and fuck he would have _dragged her_ to their desperate friend, but he received a call from Kagura when he was scouring for her in the gym.

Sesshomaru was attacking the wolf-youkai that spread the picture of them on the internet.

When he arrived at the classroom, the walls were torn apart-

The chairs and tables flipped, and there was blood splatter all over. There were several youkai teachers scattered unconscious in the room. His mate was injured- there was a significant laceration on her arm, and she pointed to the other corner, where the blood had pooled the greatest. The wolf-girl lay in the hands of Sesshomaru's beast, her throat was ripped open, and a big gash to her ribs bubbled out bloody air from her exposed lung.

The gruesome sight did not daze the mad Inu, as he lifted his claws to deliver a fatal blow to the helpless student. Naraku pummeled against Sesshomaru, knocking him away from the girl. Sesshomaru struck his claws, dragging an angry scratch mark across Naraku's left cheek.

The hanyou hissed, as he bared his own fangs and dug his claws painfully into the youkai's shoulders, pinning him with all his strength to the wall. "Get a hold of yourself!" Naraku screamed, and the beast Sesshomaru snapped his jaws at him, letting out a mad growl. "Sesshomaru," Naraku insisted, "We have to find her!"

The growling stopped, and he saw, much to his relief, his eyes teetering back from red to gold.

"She's gone, she ran off somewhere. Instead of this pointless rage, we have to find her." Naraku refused to be distracted by the slew of students, rushing to retrieve the unfortunate victims out of the room. "Sesshomaru. Are you with me?"

The inu blinked as he completely regained his consciousness. "Kagome," he finally said, "Where is she?"

* * *

*** _Fourth Year_ ***

The next thing they knew, the Shrine Girl was already the heir's girlfriend. How in the seven hells did that happen was far out of his understanding, especially after that mistake of a scandal. He could see the hatred in the Shrine Girl's eyes whenever their friend touched her, and they can only watch in frustration as their friend was slowly destroying himself into a miserable wreck.

Kagura had suggested he move on. Love another girl, but even she herself knew her advice was pointless. He had already chosen, and there was no changing his mind.

 _If only you would tell us, Daiyoukai. Stop keeping it all to yourself._

 _Who is she?_

But he did not know his question will have been answered only a few days later, when he and Kagura took an unplanned train ride home.

* * *

They saw them. Soaking wet, lost in their own thoughts, the couple sat quietly on the other edge of the train, not speaking to each other, awkward in their interactions.

The Shrine Girl had her eyes glued to the floor, sitting on his lap. Sesshomaru had his forehead rested on her back, his silent tears streaking down his cheeks, soaking the oblivious girl's shirt. His hands around her waist were tight, the look of torture on both people drawing secret glances around them. But it was not that which nailed Naraku's attention.

It was that mark on the girl's neck, so subtle it would have gone unnoticed.

But he saw it, and in that instant, everything clicked into place.

* * *

They followed them as he walked his girl home. After they kissed she left him under the rain without even saying goodbye, and as Sesshomaru turned to walk away, the sound of a fist connecting to his jaw erupted.

The sudden hit left the daiyoukai reeling.

"That one is for insulting my mate," Naraku said, catching his breath. Kagura stepped forward. She had been quiet the whole time since the train ride. She pulled on Naraku's sleeve, a silent plea to stop his assault on their clueless friend. The downpour was still heavy, but it did not hinder Naraku's anger.

Blood oozed from the side of the Inuyoukai's mouth and he tried to wipe it away, but before he could do anything, Naraku picked his pathetic form up by the collar and drove him into the nearby brick wall. "And this one is for insulting me."

"Naraku!" Kagura cried out, but he had already sucker-punched him in the face.

Sesshomaru's nose bled, but the torrential rain was washing it away- and Naraku shook the man who was avoiding his eyes. "What is wrong with you?!" Naraku screamed at the empty doll before him.

"Sesshomaru, we're not your guardians...

we're your fucking FRIENDS!"

"Naraku, please," Kagura sobbed as she tried to pull her mate away from him, but he held fast, determined to get through him. Naraku raised his fist again and rammed it into the wall, the stone crumbling into wet pieces beside the Daiyoukai's feet.

"You've been leaving us in the fucking dark for all these years, and it's fucking frustrating! You _fucking idiot_!" he clenched his teeth in despair, realizing where their friend's anguish had been coming from.

The blemish on the Shrine Girl's neck. To the ordinary person it would look like a harmless birthmark, but to a committed man like him, he knew what it was.

It was the remnants of a mating mark, painfully extracted from the girl, how she had survived such extraction and live was beyond his comprehension. He couldn't imagine the immense torture she had to go through alone-

and it sat there, cursed to fade away in time, cruelly erasing any evidence of a promise of eternity that was once made.

"Why are you not telling us anything? We're here by your side, Sesshomaru. We always have been." Naraku's grip on the inu loosened, and Kagura moved forward and embraced their friend, her shoulders shaking from her own frustrated cry.

"Are you trying to punish yourself? Is that why you're trying to burden this all on your shoulders?

Enough... You've already suffered so much,

we're here to share that burden if you just let us!"

The rage had finally died down, and what was left were three friends, standing under the heavy downpour, leaning on each other for support.

"She tried to tell me," Sesshomaru finally spoke, "Over and over again, she tried to tell me. But I didn't believe her..." Sesshomaru's eyes drowned with regret, and his voice shook.

"And now I have to live with the torment of her not knowing my name, with the possibility that she will never remember all that we shared,

I feel as if I'm losing her again...

I don't know what to do anymore."

They gave each other long moments of silence, to gather all that has been said.

"Tell us what happened," Kagura pulled away, "Start from the beginning... we'll find a way, I'm sure we will." She wiped away the tears forming again in the corners of her eyes, which was pointless anyway as the rain looked like it had no plans of stopping anytime soon. As their private ride pulled up by the corner, they dragged their exhausted friend with them, and he let out a drained breath.

He started recounting all that had happened.


	10. One Summer Day

_**A/N:**_ Any italicized sentences are read as _Sesshomaru's thoughts._ We shift to the 1860s, when Sesshomaru was all but a little pup. Thanks.

* * *

 _ **One Summer Day**_

* * *

"Wipe off that unsightly pout on your face, son." His father's voice drifted through the warm breeze. "You'll be giving our hosts the wrong impression."

The little pup whined as he looked up to the tall Daiyoukai beside him. The last of the cherry blossoms were raining down on their forms, spring was giving way for summer, and Sesshomaru pouted even more.

A sour look held his features.

His legs were already cramping from the thousand steps, and his stomach cringed uncomfortably at the thought of their destination. "Why do we have to make this visit?"

The little pup heard his father chuckle. "Congratulations are due for the Higurashi family," his father simply answered, as the little pink blossoms fell on top of the small box he was holding. Touga had to wipe the petals away. "Wouldn't you want to meet her? Their baby?"

Little Sesshomaru's brows only met. "In case you didn't notice, father, we're not really welcome at the Higurashi shrine."

Touga threw his head back and laughed, the jovial sound ringing through the solemn, sakura-lined grounds. Sesshomaru looked away, his thoughts to himself.

His father was the Ambassador to the Human-Youkai relations, and their family was obliged to keep tabs with the critical, powerful families that influenced history. One such family was the Higurashis, a clan of Priests and Priestesses who were well-renowned for their guardianship of the fabled Shikon Jewel. Most specifically, to Kyoshiro Higurashi,

who bore the pure Shikon blood.

Sesshomaru felt his goosebumps rise, at the mere thought of the High Priest's name. Kyoshiro was as old as his father Touga, and they both had existed in a tumultuous time when the main goal was to wipe out each other's existence off the face of the earth.

"Well," his father's nonchalant voice answered, "I did notice that, son."

He stopped, and reached down to the little boy, playfully messing his white hair. He crouched down to Sesshomaru's eye level, his son's golden eyes looking back with contempt. "Let's just say, that Kyoshiro-sama was brought up to hate youkais since he was a little kid. And it is already ingrained, deep in his mind, that we are his natural enemies."

Sesshomaru huffed.

"But father, you were brought up to think of humans as inferior, why are you not like that towards them? Why do you not hate that race that viewed us as monsters, why don't you feel vengeful towards the people who held holy powers, whose main purpose was to purify us in the past?!"

The little pup breathed, finally able to ask the questions that have been long holding inside. His father only smiled, as he wiped an innocent tear that streaked down his son's face.

"Son, times have changed. And the only thing I can give as an explanation is, I accepted that change, and Kyoshiro-sama did not."

He braced his hands on his son's small shoulders. "Hey, be thankful he doesn't attempt to purify us, each time we visit." He reached out and pinched the pup's nose. "At least he observes the new treaty of peace, whether he likes it or not."

Sesshomaru did not seem to be satisfied at all. "What if he suddenly decides to go away with the treaty?" he asked.

Touga stood up and straightened his kimono. "Son, if that ever happens, we're called Daiyoukai for a very apparent reason," he smirked, dusting yet again the small box he held in his hands. It was their family's gift to the Higurashis, as a welcome greeting for their firstborn who was to inherit the pure Shikon Blood.

Sesshomaru shook his head.

Would that little brat become another youkai-hater, just like its father?

"Sesshomaru, son," His father's voice drifted into his thoughts, and he snapped back to reality. He looked up, his father was nowhere in his sight, and so he ran up the last stretch of stairs to catch up.

He finally reached the last step, and he tried to catch his breath. It was ridiculous, for someone to situate their dwelling so high. He lifted his gaze up to see his father turned towards him, smiling reassuringly.

Sesshomaru had to hold his scattered hair off his face, as the warm summer wind blew. It sent down a beautiful shower of pink blossoms all around, mixed with the falling red leaves of the flagrant flame trees.

The leaves and flowers swayed around him, and he realized, they were finally at the Higurashi dwelling. A very ancient shrine with wooden pillars, arched with cedar beams, nestled in the middle of a Japanese Maple and Sakura forest. Right beside the grandiose memorial was the Higurashi Mansion, a smaller but equally traditional structure considered as a national treasure of the elusive ancient community.

Up overhead was the old Goshinboku, a giant evergreen tree that had witnessed the neverending change of times, and from far away he could hear the little river that hid in the forest behind the safe and secure grounds of the shrine.

With one last look at the beautiful landscape before him, Sesshomaru breathed, steeling himself from the unwelcome gaze of the Patriarch of the Higurashi clan. The little pup ran to his father's side, and taking his hand, made their way towards the sheltered grounds.

* * *

He fidgeted. The looks that the patriarch was throwing at them was malicious enough it could well be equated to purification, and when the High Priest opened the gift his father presented to them, the reaction was priceless.

It was as if Kyoshiro's hands were burned.

The little pup was thankful for the presence of another youkai, an older, more powerful one, who also happened to make a visit on the same day. The old youkai only laughed, upon seeing the contents of the gift.

It was a set, a decorative comb and bejeweled hair sticks- and the little pup sighed. He himself, as young as his age, knew what those gifts meant.

"There must have been a mistake," the old youkai laughed, as he slapped Touga's back in mirth. "Kyoshiro-sama, Toga-san surely did not know what these gifts symbolize."

Sesshomaru glared at his father who sat beside him.

"Gomen, everyone, but I think I'm missing something here." Touga apologized, but Sesshomaru bit down his tongue. He saw that secret smirk laced on his father's smile, the one he would always wear when he was up to something mischievous.

He knew the meaning behind those gifts. That was meant to be a courting item, from the hopeful's family when they were asking for the daughter's hand in marriage.

His father was taunting Kyoshiro-sama, he wanted to infuriate the strict priest.

 _Hopefully, this is meant to be a joke._

 _Who would want to be involved in such an uptight, intimidating family._

He hid a fanged, low growl at the thought of his hatred towards the Higurashis. Why was the youkai community constantly at their feet, trying to win their favor? All for the sake of peace? He did not like the thought of it at all. Kyoshiro-sama clearly did not want himself and his family to be involved in the treaty. Why not just leave them alone?

Angered, the little child stood up.

"Son?" Touga called out, from which the pup bowed and excused himself.

"I'm just going to step outside and look around." Sesshomaru exited the door before anyone could hold him back.

* * *

The very air of the mansion was suffocating, Kyoshiro-sama's hatred towards them was so evident he was surprised his father, deemed one of the strongest in the Youkai community, had put up with it. As he breathed in the fresh air of the grounds, Sesshomaru sank his feet on the soft grass and made his way barefoot to the quiet of the large shrine. He peeked behind the large wooden doors, and a few people were offering their prayers, some guests were talking to each other quietly at the sides.

The smell of burning incense wafted into his sensitive nose.

He drew back and covered his mouth, holding a sneeze that threatened to destroy the solemn atmosphere. Not wanting to disturb the patrons, he darted off quickly. He ran past the scattered rows of Sakura and Maple, and hid behind the nearest sheltering, towering entity- the Goshinboku.

He finally let out his torture, and he heaved a sigh of relief.

A soft, demure laugh rose from beside him, and he turned towards the source. It was the kimono-clad form of Anna Higurashi, Kyoshiro-sama's wife.

"Bless you, Sesshomaru-chan," she smiled. The sun's rays peeked through the gaps of the giant tree's canopy, creating little patches of light on their forms, and on the lulling grass below them. Anna was leaning on the broad trunk of the evergreen, holding a small bundle in her arms. The swaddle moved, and she carefully shifted the precious cargo to her other arm.

"Your sneeze woke her up," Anna teased, and the little pup's cheeks flushed red.

"Ahh, Gomen nasai!" the little boy bowed, all flustered and in the verge of panic. Anna only laughed.

"It's okay, Sesshomaru-chan. She doesn't mind. Now she is awake, she will be able to see the beauty of the world. You see, she especially loves looking at the sky. That's why I take her outside all the time, on the fierce orange sunrise, the golden sunsets, and the blue afternoons in between."

"Really?" Sesshomaru leaned over, his curiosity getting the best of him. Anna smiled at him sweetly, her aura emitting genuine happiness and love as her cool blue eyes settled on the form of the small bundle.

"Yes," she tilted her head towards Sesshomaru, her dark brown hair swaying in the gentle summer breeze. "Would you like to meet her? My little Kagome?"

The pup stepped back, the blush on his cheeks rising ever more. "Will she want to? I- I don't want to scare her away," he blurted out, and he was restless. He combed his fingers through his white hair in attempts to hide his pointed ears, "She might see my ears," his innocent golden eyes grew wide as he covered his mouth. "My fangs, she might get frightened with my fangs-"

"Sesshomaru-chan," Anna laughed softly, "what are you so scared of?"

The little pup remained silent for long moments, but Anna was patient. She waited, while the wind rustled through the leaves of the trees, while the birds fluttered from one branch to another,

she waited until the little patches of sunlight streamed like little golden rivers of light on their quiet forms.

"I'm afraid she might hate me," Sesshomaru finally said, as he absently reached out and caught a blood-red maple leaf on his hand. "Just like how her father does."

Anna shifted as she straightened her lavender kimono. With that calm, patient smile she always greeted them whenever they would come to visit, she leaned towards him.

"She won't hate you, Sesshomaru-chan. In fact, I think she likes you.

She smiles whenever she hears your voice."

Anna remained silent, as she observed the inu pup standing quietly before her.

"She does?" he asked, and Anna nodded her head eagerly. And she tilted her little bundle towards him, and the little boy stepped forward, his nose up in the air, sniffing the little child's mood cautiously.

"Sesshomaru-chan," Anna said softly, "I would like you to meet Kagome, our little shrine girl."

The gentle warm breeze blew against his hair, sending in another shower of pink and red that scattered from the surrounding trees around them,

and Sesshomaru took a deep breath.

The little child with ebony hair and blue eyes, as blue as the sky above them, fearlessly reached out to him, and she wrapped her little fingers around his hesitant hand.

The small, fragile child smiled at him, and he smiled back.

And that moment unconsciously burned in his memories-

Because he realized, in between the sway of the trees, the soft lullaby of the wind caressing his cheeks, the drifting, weightless clouds of the endless blue sky, something had changed.

And he knew he would never forget this moment,

this warm summer day the sakura blossoms and maple leaves fell like rain,

when the little shrine girl smiled at him

and held his hand for the first time.


	11. The Sky Above

_**A/N:**_ Sorry for the late upload. So here you go. Thanks for sticking around :)

 ** _*Italicized bold* -_** Sesshomaru communicating mentally in Inu form

Italicized lines - Sesshomaru's thoughts

 _Italicized **paragraphs** are flashbacks._

* * *

 _ **The Sky Above**_

* * *

"Just a little bit more, Sesshomaru-sama," the girl pleaded from behind the large canvas, "please, just a little bit more."

His floppy white ears flicked in irritation. He had been holding an itch for quite a while now in this Inu form, but seeing her in such intense concentration, her brows knit together as her wrists flowed from palette to canvas, made him stay rooted obediently to his spot.

He huffed in annoyance.

This simple human who aged like him, who had the appearance of a mere twelve-year-old, had him, a promising InuDaiyoukai, on his knees with one command. Perhaps it was his fondness for the girl? Ever since she was born, his father had to make weekly visits to the Higurashi shrine. Sometimes they would even go as often as twice a week, with other youkais and humans, of course, to settle matters of the peace treaty. And as the days passed by he realized he did not mind the unwelcome glare of the Higurashi patriarch, the threatening aura was slowly being drowned by a warmth that greeted him every time he set foot on the grounds of the ancient shrine.

She was there, the little shrine girl, who would always welcome him with a smile as warm as the summer breeze. She would reach out to him like the rays of the sun that streamed through the fire trees, always eager to touch.

Her laughter would fill his ears, when he would reach back and smile at her, bounding like a little puppy, greeting him in welcome.

The girl finally shifted, and with a final flick of her wrist she looked at him and she smiled. "I'm finished." The Inu sighed. In one swift movement, he found himself gravitating beside her, always beside her- and she peeked at him shyly.

"What do you think?" she asked.

 ** _*It's beautiful.*_**

The girl beamed proudly at herself, as he took a step back to observe her creation. Before him was a large portrait of him in his Inu form, sitting in the soft grass, looking up at the sky. The motion of his fur being captured by the wind, as his golden eyes were lifted up to the endless heavens-

The sky was electric blue, the grass looked like liquid, swaying gently with the lull of the breeze-

How the clouds seem to float like a distant dream, passing by the ever constant sky. It looked so so surreal, so beautiful. Every brush stroke, every little detail of the fleeting moment she had magically captured, and it made him wonder.

 _In her eyes, did she really see the world as beautiful as this?  
_

"Gomen nasai, Sesshomaru-sama." She looked down in humble modesty. "It may not do justice with the actual you, but I tried my best-"

He fondly leaned over and nipped at her ears. _ ***Stop berating yourself. It's perfect, Kagome.***_

She blushed heavily, her usual reaction whenever he said her name instead of her pet name, _Shrine Girl_. She looked down, nervously playing with the brush in her hands. She stole another shy glance at him, and slowly leaned to his warmth. If Sesshomaru were in human form, he would have smiled at her subtle attempts.

It all started when she was the age of sixty, in a warm midsummer afternoon. She had just finished clearing the leaves from the thousand steps when she suddenly turned to him and confessed.

" _I like you_ _, Sesshomaru-sama."_

He could recall it as if it happened just yesterday, the sound of her voice as crisp as the maple leaves that crushed under his feet during that red and golden sunset.

 _She stayed still after that for long moments, until he realized she was waiting for an answer._ _He just smiled at her that day, and reached out to mess her hair._ _"Sesshomaru-sama, you idiot," she mumbled, her pout only igniting a laugh from him. How else could he have reacted?_

It was hard to take those words seriously, especially if those sentiments came from the mouth of a girl who looked like a five-year-old.

So Sesshomaru took her confession as a childhood crush, a silly infatuation.

One day he accidentally found an etching she had made behind the Goshinboku. It was their initials, S&K inside a heart. He had teased her about it for weeks, much to her embarrassment. But she never erased it, instead, as time passed by, the etching grew deeper and deeper.

The Inu decided not to dwell on it. She still looked so young, and although he knew she aged like him, physically slowly, he was still aware that her mind was as pure as the water in the Higurashi well house. Untouched and untainted, and the portraits she had painted so beautifully was the most transparent reflection of the contents of her mind.

She saw the world as a sheltering place, where love could heal all things and friendships lasted forever.

 _Her mind will change, once she emotionally matures._

 _Then she will learn that the world is an unforgiving, unfair place…_

He heard her gasp from beside him. Her bodily warmth left him, and she darted away from his side. Her laughter drifted through the open field as she pointed to the blue sky.

"Sesshomaru-sama, look!" She yelled excitedly, and he lifted his gaze up. It was one of those new human inventions, flying contraptions they named _airplanes,_ tearing through the sky. "Ah, I wish I could fly too!" She turned to him, her eyes full and expecting.

Sesshomaru sighed. ** _*I will have that ability when I reach a hundred and fifty. If you are patient I can take you with me-*_** before he could even finish his sentence she engulfed him in a warm embrace, the span of her arms not even enough to encircle his large Inu form. She buried her face in his hair, and he felt her genuine smile through his fur.

"That's a promise, okay?" She said almost quietly, and he nudged his muzzle in her hair.

 ** _*You ask too many favors from me. One day I might decide to collect payment,*_**

She laughed, as she released him and laid herself on the grass. The two friends settled close beside each other, too close that the girl's ebony hair splayed on his platinum white, creating a beautiful contrast of light and dark, mingling together in perfect harmony, swaying with the soft song of the wind, dancing with the trees and the grass and the flowers around them.

The shrine girl beside him suddenly fell quiet, as she stared longingly at the sky. And he fell into that same spell, basking in her mere presence. For a small creature like her, she was filled with so much love that the warmth of her aura overflowed in the air around her. He hummed in contentment. He knew what was coming when she started to get silent.

"Just look up, Sesshomaru-sama. Look at the white trail of clouds that the airplane left," she started, and he held his breath.

She was about to describe the world through her eyes.

She pointed up, "Look how they expand… reaching across the borderless sky, without fear into the unknown," she tried to catch the clouds with her hands, "one could not imagine what lies beyond…the places it would drift to,

It's such a big world… and I feel so small under its sheltering dome. How many people right now are like us, looking up, touched by the same thought?"

If there was something that she fiercely showed her passion towards aside from her silly infatuation, it was her love for the sky. Her mother had perfectly said it, that warm summer day he met her; she loved the fierce orange sunrise, the lonely golden sunsets, and the lazy blue afternoons in between.

Many summers ago he had gifted to her an expensive brush set, some paint, and canvas. He had asked her to paint the sky as she saw it through her eyes, and since then he felt he had finally seen a part of her she was trying so hard to show him.

" _Why do you love watching the sky?" He asked her._

" _Its an infinite canvas that changes hue every hour, and you are helpless against its flow- " she said, "The moment you wake up, it spills its magnificent streaks of red, orange and pink into your life, and you just stand underneath its warmth and let it soak your soul._

 _The orange subtly bows down to the royal cerulean, like a prince to his lover… embracing it until the euphoria of colors that were shooting in your eyes lull you to a lazy blue afternoon. You watch the clouds drift by_ _… And before you know it, everything is quiet and still.  
_

 _Sunset has arrived, and the blue afternoon nods its head wearily to golden hues. The world slowly sinks into blissful indigo, and the stars begin to peek into the night sky, plunging into dark blue, adorning itself with eternal heavenly lights.  
_

 _And it resets into a blank canvas, readying itself for another day of ever-changing hues, another day of orange sunrises, of golden sunsets and lazy blue afternoons in between.  
_

 _Sesshomaru-sama, sometimes the sky cries, sometimes it comforts, sometimes it hurts your eyes… but it's always constant; it_ _'s always there. And it always reminds me that I am home,"_

 _She paused and looked at him._

" _More than anything, I love watching the sky, because it reminds me that wherever we are in this world, we are underneath one heaven."_

 _She held her breath. "It gives me comfort to know that Sesshomaru-sama and I, no matter how far apart we are to each other, are standing under one sky."_

The Shrine Girl suddenly blushed, and her aura seemed hesitant. But a flare of courage washed away her fear, and he heard her take a deep breath beside him.

"I still like you, Sesshomaru-sama… I like you very, very much," she almost whispered.

"Just wanted to let you know, in case you forgot."

The two friends lay quietly beside each other for the rest of the afternoon, lost in their thoughts.

* * *

Two summers had passed by, and nothing had really changed between the two friends. His father still made his visits, Kyoshiro-sama still held that same quiet loathing.

But the shrine girl made everything bearable. She always welcomed them with her constant warmth.

That afternoon was like any other, but before they even set foot outside their estate, his father had told Sesshomaru of the news that was circulating the town.

" _A renegade youkai is on the loose," his father warned, "he managed to escape the prison where he was bound for in years. He gets his strength by stealing the souls of other youkai. The worst thing is, he does not consume his hostage soul immediately. He stores it in a void to slowly suck out its life. Such cruel torture_ _…_

 _Be careful, son. At these times, do not leave the Higurashi Manor alone._ _"_

The whole council left the shrine for an extensive investigation, leaving Sesshomaru at the Higurashi dwelling with the humble auxiliaries tending to the Shikon Shrine.

Sesshomaru slipped outside the mansion, but when he took his first steps out, a small hand grabbed his wrist.

"Sesshomaru-sama," It was the shrine girl, looking up at him with immense worry slathered thickly across her face. "Where are you going?"

"Outside," he shrugged. "I'm going to the river to see if our lilies grew."

"But it's dangerous!" She tried pulling him towards her with her puny strength. "Sesshomaru-sama, didn't you hear about that blind youkai who steals souls-"

Sesshomaru merely chuckled. "I'm a daiyoukai," he said as he pulled his arm away from her. "Are you coming with me?"

"Sesshomaru-sama," she warned, her voice growing dangerously low. The absolute distress in her voice was irritating him, and a soft blue light glowed on her hand. "You have to stay. Or else… or else…"

"What, you'll purify me?" He smirked mockingly,

"I only want you to be safe," she whimpered as her voice shook, and he sighed in exasperation.

"Damn it Shrine Girl, are you going to cry again? Stop being so pathetic. You're a hundred years old, and you're still the same immature child,"

He watched as her jaw fell open and tears flooded her eyes. She stepped away from him. Her sudden voluntary distance left a hollow feeling inside his soul.

He then realized, he had unwittingly hurt her.

"I'm not an immature child," she whispered. "Sesshomaru-sama, you big idiot… after all these years," she shook her head and ran away.

Sesshomaru felt annoyed more than anything. He still couldn't imagine himself in any romantic involvement with the Shrine Girl. Although she held the appearance of a fourteen-year-old, he still saw her as that silly little five-year-old on the shrine steps, ridiculously confessing her immense like towards him.

She was still that little girl that wore ill-fitting, rag-colored yukatas that were always too large for her, that same warm-hearted child with paint on her cheeks that bound to him like an eager puppy whenever he was around. But a certain guilt gnawed at him, and he found himself restless.

He followed her to apologize.

But seeing where she was headed towards, he thought of it pointless. She went into the outdoor hallways, the one that connected the mansion to the large shrine. She had her brush set on her hands.

She was going to attend to the large mural that she was working on at one of the walls of the temple.

So Sesshomaru decided to head the other way, out towards the Maple and Sakura forest where the small, shallow river was. And as he neared, he did not expect to see someone hunched over by the lily bed that they planted.

Warning bells rang inside his head when he realized that the figure was a blindfolded man.

The man grinned at him. The moment he did, Sesshomaru felt his limbs lock painfully.

"Mmm, a young daiyoukai." The blind man rasped, "just in time for dinner."

His legs gave way, and he fell on the ground like a limp doll. Sesshomaru thought he could hear the Shrine Girl's voice call out his name,

And his world was engulfed in darkness.

* * *

 _Is this all_ _a dream?_

He woke up into a strange, limbo-like place, where the sky was a confusion of angry reds and shooting purples. The very ground was unstable and teetering, and the air was tentative and suffocating.

His feet and hands were bound in chains in a shallow lake-like body of water, soaked only to the ankles. And he could see, from around him, numerous other people bound like him.

His eyes widened in panic.

 _Not a dream… a nightmare, a horrible nightmare…_

Some were on their knees. Some had already slumped on the water, their face shoved on the weird, dark liquid- unmoving, with no other sign of life. His eyes searched in panic at the hopeless faces around him- they only looked back with empty eyes, resigned to their miserable fate. Sesshomaru tried to move.

But every movement he made sent a wave of intractable pain that came shooting through his very soul. A fear like never before started to consume him. He opened his mouth to call for help, but his voice was non-existent.

Suddenly, a familiar aura hovered close by.

The warm energy reached out to him. It hit a barrier that sealed the dark lake like a dome, but the familiar power persisted, trying to make its presence known, trying to comfort him,

And then it dawned on him. It was her, the Shrine Girl.

The dark dome rattled and shook as her power clashed against it. Her holy force was trying to break the dome open. The lake rippled beneath his feet, and the ground shook at the impact. Her energy wrapped around the fortification once again and struck with such dominance it was terrifying.

 _Since when had she become this strong?_

"You can't do that," a voice echoed sonorous across the empty void. "The Inu's soul is already bound to mine. If you destroy me, you also destroy him."

 _What kind of nightmare is this…_

"Please," Kagome's voice was so distant it felt surreal. He realized she was crying again, and his heart constricted as it always did whenever she shed her tears. He always hated it when the Shrine Girl cried.

"Take my soul instead," she pleaded,

Sesshomaru's eyes flew wide in panic.

 _Wake up, Sesshomaru, wake up!_

"I don't consume human souls, dear Miko." The voice answered. "I find them quite disgusting."

"Is there anything else I can offer to bring him back," She sobbed. "Please, bring him back to me…"

Sesshomaru did not realize his own tears were running down.

"I don't know," the sly, disgusting voice slithered on Sesshomaru's skin like living muck.

"Next to the soul of the Inu you hold so dearly, more than your life… do you have something else you consider priceless?

Something that I don't have that you can give me…

do you have that, Miko?"

He could see the warm energy teeter in fear above him. It drew back, hesitating. And it shook, her warm, familiar energy trembled in uncertainty.

And suddenly… it stabilized.

"Yes," her voice was shaking, trying to contain her immense fear. "Next to the Inu, I have something I hold dear, something that you don't have… are you willing to take it?"

And another wave of pain suddenly shot through him. The dark barrier shook, and the warm energy broke inside.

He realized he could feel the shrine girl's hands wrapping him in a warm embrace.

* * *

"Ah, you're finally awake."

He woke up to a golden sunset. They were not by the river. Kagome was standing before him, her back facing him, at the clearing where they would always lay down to watch the sky. Sesshomaru let out a heavy breath of relief,

 _So it was all a dream?_

"How are you feeling, Sesshomaru-sama?" She never really looked back at him. Her gaze was kept heaven-bound. She was clutching something in her right hand. Her messily-bound hair was swaying gently in the breeze, the torn, worn-out material of her hand-me-down yukata drifting with the sway.

"Good." He managed, and he could see the grip on her hand tighten.

"I'm glad," she answered.

Something suddenly dripped from her clutch… and slowly, a tight, constricting feeling held at his throat.

The dripping liquid was her blood.

Sesshomaru stood up and stepped forward. His bones were aching, and a despair like none other threatened to swallow him whole. He roughly grabbed her bloody hand. Even with that, her gaze remained to the sky. He pried her hand open and saw what she was holding.

It was one of her precious brushes, broken in half. _She_ broke it in half, that was why her fragile hands were bleeding.

 _It wasn't a dream._

"What did you give?" Sesshomaru braced his hands on her shoulders and shook her, "Kagome what did you give?!"

"Nothing I can learn to live without," She said, looking away, hiding her eyes with her messy bangs.

"Damn it, Kagome-" he cursed, and his gaze shifted to a distance, to that certain spot where she would usually paint. Her canvas was there, and her brush sets lying scattered on the grass instead of being carefully settled in its silken case. "Your brushes-" He turned back to her, and saw a forced, bitter smile break her serene face.

"Leave it there." She said.

"But the material will-"

"Just leave it there... I have no use for it anymore, Sesshomaru-sama. So just.."

Her sentence faltered, and her voice broke. And Sesshomaru stepped forward, as the tight feeling in his throat strangled at him, making it physically harder to breathe. He pulled her to face towards him,

And he felt as if his breath was knocked out of his lungs.

She still had her eyes glued to the sky. But it was not the quiet contentment, nor the bright euphoria whenever she gazed up. She was crying, those blue eyes full of confusion and fear- and it was then that it dawned on him,

The crushing realization.

"I'm sorry," Sesshomaru seized her in his arms, "Kagome I'm so sorry," he cried, his heartbreak soaking on the material of her worn-out yukata.

"Sesshomaru-sama," she whispered, fresh tears spilling from her expressive blue eyes, her gaze still heaven-bound. "Can you do me a favor? Can you look up at the sky?" Her voice shook again, "Look up, and tell me what you see..."

Sesshomaru clung to her tighter, biting his tongue down to contain the whimpers that were threatening to escape.

"Is the sky golden? Or is it a mixture of rich violet? Have the first stars peeked out yet?" She searched the vast canvas before her, but she did not find what she was looking for.

Her eyes only reflected blankness, just like the empty void before her.

And Sesshomaru could not fathom what he was feeling, what _she_ would have been feeling, he could only hold her tighter, unable to form any words.

She gave up her sight in exchange for his soul.

"Sesshomaru-sama..." she said softly, tears running down unchecked on her soft cheeks, "Stop crying…" She reached out and ran her hands across the outline of his face, searching for his tears and wiping them away with her bloodied hands.

"I'm here now, aren't I?

And you're standing beside me. That's all that matters."

 _H_ _ow unfair,_

 _I'm the one who is supposed to be comforting you..._

He took her hands and pressed it to his lips, she was crying herself, but desperately trying to hold it all in for his sake. His face was smeared with her blood, but he did not care. He ran her hands over the outline of his face again, letting her feel every dip and curve.

And she smiled despite herself, as she tried to memorize his features. "You're standing beside me," she repeated, "That's all that matters."

And finally the sun had set, the golden had nodded its weary head to give way to dusk.

Sesshomaru cursed at himself for his stubbornness and ignorant pride. He cursed at her for her selflessness and unwarranted devotion.

And he cursed at the sky for being so beautiful at that moment, as it bled gold, with laces of purple curtains of red,

The sky she so loved, the sky that she will never be able to see again.


	12. In Unstable Grounds

**_A/N:_** I'm sure this got lost in the course of the story, so this is just to keep you guys back on track. Remember when, at the start of the story, Kagome had terrible eyesight?

And at her video in their Yuinou (chapter 5), Kagome pointed to the wrong gift and apologized, saying she was _"Still as blind as a bat?"_ And remember Sesshomaru's weird habit, (he first did this in chapter 3,) that whenever he and Kagome kissed, he would always let her feel the outline of his face?

Everything pointed to her being blinded in the past, and the previous chapter was how it became so. I didn't just throw that chapter in randomly like a crazy person. :P But Y'all know that she somehow regained her eyesight. The _how_ , though, we'll find out later. Thanks. :)

* * *

 ** _In Unstable Grounds_**

* * *

 _"_ _I promise, I'll always be there when you need me. I'll be waiting at the corners until you call, and even if we're far apart, I'll do everything in my strength just to be with you._

 _My affection will always belong to you, Sesshomaru-sama. No matter what happens."_

 _That was her silly promise when she was ninety, and he was a hundred and eighty. He even fell into a fit of laughter, humored by her overdramatic claim, and she pouted as usual, nervously fiddling the hem of her old, rag-colored yukata._

 _He had just talked to her about his father's infidelity, and how they found out about his illegitimate half-brother. They had to send Inuyasha to another country to avoid the unforgiving judgment of the community, only to bring him back when the controversy had died down. And she lent her shoulder to him, as she held him in her comforting warmth._

Now, though, was a similar scene before him, except that they were a little bit older, and the roles reversed. "Sesshomaru-sama," she whispered, "will you promise to be there whenever I need you, to hold my hand whenever I need some comfort?"

"I can't promise that, Shrine Girl. We never know what the strings of fate have laid out for us."

He sat quietly beside her, as she buried her face on his kimono and cried. When he found her that day beside the Goshinboku, she did not greet him with her usual warmth. She had been grieving, heartbroken at the news she heard from her mother that morning.

One of her younger friends had passed away from old age.

He did not know how to console someone. So he just sat beside the shrine girl the whole afternoon, as she talked about the little details of her friend's life. Her little quirks, her annoying habits, how her friend met her special someone, about the solemn marriage ceremony held in the shrine-

How her friend had many kids-

And how her kids grew up before her very eyes.

"But you won't outgrow me," she argued.

"How could I outgrow you? I'm a hundred and fifty years older. You're half my age. If anything, There's a high probability that I'm going to die first-" he felt a jab on the side of his ribs. The shrine girl had just poked him hard, and her brows bunched together in anger.

"Stupid Sesshomaru-sama. You're supposed to comfort me, not make me feel worse!" She pulled away and this time, buried her face in her hands. He would have laughed at her silliness, but her shoulders shook, and she was biting her lip.

A torrent of tears was streaking down her cheeks.

"What is it," It took all his willpower to say it as softly as he can. He really was not the one to comfort someone, and he felt awkward. But the shrine girl's tears called out to him, the way her delicate fingers clutched his sleeve tight, he had to say something.

"I wouldn't know…" she started, trying to find the words she wanted to say. "I wouldn't know what to do… if you would die before me."

"It's the course of nature, shrine girl." He said, recycling what his father told a long time ago. "Some people stay, and some leave. Life follows its own course. Like the flow of the water in the river, sometimes it ebbs, sometimes it gushes. But what else can we do? We cannot control the flow.

All we can do is to learn how to swim."

She cried even harder.

He was about to sigh at her frivolous sentimentality when she suddenly wrapped him in a tight embrace. "I'm not going to think of it, not now." She said as if trying to reassure herself, more than letting him know. "You're beside me. That's all that matters… And I won't let every moment with Sesshomaru-sama pass me by as if it were nothing."

This time he chuckled. _Such a stubborn little girl._

Her hands gently reached out, and he received it, settling her palms on his cheeks. Ever since she was blinded it had become an annoying habit of hers to feel the outline of his face.

She had learned to read energy signatures, from where she would create an outline of images in her mind, enabling her to recognize things around her. But Sesshomaru's youki was unique, and anyone could easily identify him, even with their eyes closed.

But she would still reach out.

Somehow, she _needed_ to touch him,

to verify that he was physically beside her and feel him.

It probably provided her a sense of comfort, and so he allowed her to do so, even with the angry glare of the Higurashi Patriarch, burning holes on his skin whenever his daughter fondly did so.

Ever since she lost her vision, Kyoshiro-sama's hatred festered such that the high priest would not even speak to him. But Kagome used her charm to convince everyone, even her father, that Sesshomaru's version of the events was unfounded.

She told everyone she had been unconscious the whole time, and she woke up only to find herself without any vision.

And Kagome would tell him she didn't remember anything. She was trying to take the blame off him.

They believed her.

But Sesshomaru already knew the truth.

He fondly planted a soft kiss on his childhood friend's forehead. Kagome ran her fingers gently on the outline of his face, and she leaned her head on his. "Sesshomaru-sama," she whispered, very softly. "I still wouldn't know what to do without you."

 _Knowing you and your infallible strength,_

 _you'd probably move on._

And all of a sudden, the off-handed thought struck him, shook something deep in his soul.

 _You would move on, despite the odds,_

 _And continue to share that warmth with everyone else,_

 _create a happy life, even if it is without me._

A distressing, uncomfortable feeling settled in the deepest chambers of his mind, and he tried to shake it away.

He thought, that as the day passed by, the feeling would dissolve into nothing, a petty concern that just passed his consciousness, a fleeting emotion that would drown in the bustle of the miscellaneous worries of the day.

But he sat through the last half of the council's meet. And he waved goodbye at the blue-eyed shrine girl as the sun had set. And he laid his head to rest that night, and he found out he could not sleep.

The thought of her moving on without him had disturbed him to no end, and he breathed an exhausted breath, when the sun rose on his miserable, sleepless self.

He had just realized, and it had thrown his entire world off balance.

 _I can't let you move on without me…_

 _Your warmth,_

 _Your smile…_

 _I want it all for myself._

* * *

Sesshomaru tried to hide his yawn but found he could not help it. His father elbowed him as subtly as he could. He was nodding off to sleep in the middle of the meeting.

"We should start with the extensive cleaning if we want to reach our deadline of early fall." One of the High Priests of the council said as he turned to the rigid-shouldered Kyoshiro.

The Higurashi Patriarch's lips tightened into a stern line. "Why don't we use your shrine for the upcoming Lantern Festival?" Kyoshiro quipped. "We've been using Shibuya as a host for centuries-"

The man just laughed, as he reached over and patted Kyoshiro's back. "Listen, _great great grand-uncle_. If I weren't related to you, I would say you're hogging the Shikon Shrine all to yourself."

Kyoshiro's eyes narrowed. The smiling man sighed. "Kyoshiro-sama, I understand that you want to protect the architecture. But realize this, our shrine in Shibuya is not even one-fourth the size of this one in Bunkyo, yet the patrons are ten times more than what you have!"

"Mamoru-sama is right." One of the older youkais conceded. "We need to encourage more patrons in your shrine, and the Lantern Festival is the perfect opportunity to lure in guests."

Touga nodded his head. "We can take care of the expenses,"

Mamoru raised his hand. "I can bring in my daughter Kikyo to help with the Shrine Maiden duties. I'm sure you need more than one. Kagome-sama can also use some of my daughter's Miko haori and hakama, my little Kikyo-chan has grown into a fine lady, and is about her size now,"

Two pairs of eyes snapped in attention upon the mention of Kagome.

Her overprotective father Kyoshiro,

And unnoticed by the rest of the council, her childhood friend.

"Kagome will suffice by my side during the event." Kyoshiro dismissed. Sesshomaru stayed quiet, his thoughts restless, unnerved by the fact that he had just agreed to one of Kyoshiro's ideas.

One of the youkais leaned back. "Why? So you can glare swords and daggers at anyone who comes near her?" There was a long pause. "I don't mean to offend you. I know she is your most prized treasure. But Kyoshiro-sama, she is a hundred and forty-seven now. She is your heir. As the bearer of the Shikon blood, someday she will have to manage the shrine on her own. She will have to choose her own lover, birth her own heir, continue the bloodline."

As if on cue the shoji doors slid open, and in walked the shrine girl, as simple as she had always been. Her hair was bound messily in a bun, her rag-colored yukata a size too big for her, and there was a smear of black on her cheek, as she had been to the kitchen and had just tended to the water for their tea. Her unseeing blue eyes were cast down as she made her way into the room.

"Speaking of heirs," One of the Youkais said as he turned to Touga, "Isn't your Sesshomaru at the age to choose his own mate?"

"Yeah," Touga shrugged nonchalantly, "Why?"

Kagome made her way to their side, as she started pouring the contents of the western teapot in their cups. "I have a daughter his age. Perhaps we could introduce them to each other?"

Kagome's grip suddenly faltered. But they did not notice. Even Sesshomaru did not see-

He did not even hear what they were talking about.

His golden eyes were intense on the Shrine Girl, his mind immersed in her blue eyes, at how the steam of the piping hot liquid rose to her face, flushing her cheeks red,

 _The shrine girl…_

 _Will have to choose her own lover,_

"Your son has not chosen yet, has he?" Another youkai affirmed, "I have a daughter only twenty years younger than him. She would be a better match."

Sesshomaru could not tear his eyes off her. The council continued to talk, and every word thrown around him was a mix of nonsense sounds and incomprehensible phonics. He was trapped in an internal world of his own.

 _She will choose her own lover,_

 _She will have to birth her own heir,_

"So it's settled then, Sesshomaru? Tomorrow evening?"

The Inuyoukai was not listening.

 _Will she favor me?_

"Sesshomaru, boy, tomorrow evening," the youkai repeated, but Sesshomaru could not drag his thoughts out of his internal turmoil. Then it suddenly dawned on him.

 _Does she still even like me?_

A terrible, sinking feeling started to settle in his gut. It was as if he had just ingested some kind of poison, and it spread throughout his entire body, burning his veins. The Shrine Girl who was right across the table stopped what she was doing, and tilted her head to him.

 _The harrowing memory of her as a little girl on the shrine steps, as she confessed to him for the first time, flashed in his mind._

 _And images of both of them laying in the grass, her ebony hair splayed against his platinum white, as she pointed to the blue sky,_

"Sesshomaru!" He felt a slap on his back, and it finally jolted him to his senses. It was his father, who had stood from his seat in concern.

The young daiyoukai tried to save face. "Yes," Sesshomaru said distractedly, "tomorrow evening."

A loud crash was heard, as the ceramic pot that Kagome was holding shattered to pieces on the floor. "Gomen nasai," she muttered as she hurriedly kneeled to pick up the pieces, and she quickly exited the room.

Sesshomaru stood up and walked after her.

He did not notice the knowing eyes of his father had been watching him, ever since the Shrine Girl entered the room. Touga turned to his friend and sighed. "Can we just disregard his answer, and ask him another time? My son seemed to be distracted when he was making the decision."

The youkai nodded. "Then I guess a dinner date with my daughter for tomorrow evening will have to wait."

* * *

He found her in the lower part of the thousand steps, trying to sweep away the dead leaves that fell on the stairs. The autumn wind would only bring down another batch, and she would huff in frustration as she would repeat the whole painstaking process.

He chuckled, as he stopped four steps above her. She paused and slowly turned towards him.

"Why did you run away, Shrine Girl? Afraid the bad youkais will eat you?" He teased, and instead of a carefree laugh as he expected, she cast her head down.

"I just had to get away, to remind myself that I have my own life, and you have yours." She answered.

Sesshomaru frowned, as he headed down the stairs towards her, he even walked past her, down four steps more, so he would be at eye level with her small figure.

He hovered his face close to hers, too close that their noses touched. "What are you rambling about? Is this one of your mood swings?" He reached out and slowly dragged his thumb on her soft cheek, wiping the black smear off her face. With the blatant closeness of their bodies, she would have already blushed. He was trying to intimidate her, wanting to dominate her with the heat of his warmth.

He wanted her to tremble as she always did, whenever he touched first.

Before, subtle affections would set her off all flustered. If the back of his hand brushed hers accidentally, or if he nipped at her ear teasingly, she would have exploded as red as a fire tree and be all quiet, clamming up in innocent embarrassment.

But now, the Shrine Girl did not even flinch. She did not blush, she did not hold her breath.

She only looked away.

That terrible, sinking feeling from earlier suddenly churned at his guts.

 _Kagome…_

"Good luck tomorrow evening, Sesshomaru-sama." She whispered.

He pulled away and blinked. "Tomorrow evening? What about tomorrow evening?"

The Shrine Girl shook her head and shut her eyes tight. "Stupid Sesshomaru-sama! You know what I'm talking about, so please don't rub it in my face!" To his confusion, she started to cry again, and he reached out to wipe her tears.

But she pushed his hands away. And she stepped back, out of his reach.

He felt sinking gut twist sharply, and his golden eyes widened as the poison started to seep into his blood, numbing his extremities, a cold tingle wrapping in his spine.

 _Did what happen to us at the river change your mind?_

 _Did time ebb away what you once held for me?_

"I'm sorry… Sesshomaru-sama, I'm so sorry," She strode forward and reached out to run her fingers on his face, and he eagerly complied.

And he felt desperate for her touch.

He felt as if he were a parched plant in the middle of the desert, striving on her drops of affection to control this horrible, insatiable thirst.

"I'm thinking of myself too much, just ignore my selfishness… I'm sure you'll have a good time tomorrow evening. I heard many stories about her beauty,"

"Kagome, what the hell are you talking about?" He searched her unseeing blue eyes that were flowing with tears. He was, in all honesty, utterly confused. She just shook her head and ran her hands over a stray strand of white hair that fell on his face.

"Enough with that. I promised once that I wouldn't let every moment with Sesshomaru-sama pass me by as if it were nothing…" she cupped her hands tenderly on his face, and he leaned on her warmth. "Even if it ends now, at least I have this moment, that is all that matters."

"And why would you do that?" He asked, and she gave a light chuckle, thinking he was not serious. "Why would you want to value our time together?" He prodded, waiting for an answer,

Waiting for three specific words,

Words she had told him, over and over again in the past,

Words that she had never repeated, ever since the incident at the river.

 _Please tell me once again…_

She kissed his forehead fondly, and he closed his eyes.

 _For the longest time, I thought you would never change,_

 _I grew complacent, I took those words for granted…_

 _How cruel of you,_

 _You always said you would never know what to do without me,_

 _When the truth is, I was the one all along who couldn't do without you…_

The image of her on the shrine steps flashed in his mind again, along with all the many other instances she confessed, and his soul craved those three words so badly from her lips that the anticipation manifested in an indescribable pain.

 _Kagome, let me hear it, one last time… please, just one last time…_

The Shrine Girl slowly pulled away, and with a sad smile on her face, she sighed.

"Silly Sesshomaru-sama."

She laughed softly, and she turned towards the grounds.

He watched, as her familiar form scaled the steps. He held his breath when she suddenly paused, but she never looked back. "Isn't it funny how I grew up with you, yet the entire time, I never saw you in a formal kimono?" She chuckled, "I finally will. See you next week in the Lantern Festival, Sesshomaru-sama. "

She finally left the Inu to himself, alone in the quiet of the thousand steps. There was something in the autumn wind that chilled him to the bone. Something about the gloomy, dull sky that nestled that crushing feeling.

This time, she did not say those three words:

 ** _"_** ** _I like you,_**

 ** _Sesshomaru-sama."_**


	13. In Deeper Waters

**_A/N:_** Ema - small wooden plaques with inscribed prayers or wishes

Kagura-den - A building within the shrine where sacred dances and music are held/offered

Haiden- Oratory/Worship hall

Heiden- Offertory Hall

 _*Italicized*_ are Sesshomaru's thoughts

 ** _Italicized bold_** is flashback

* * *

 ** _In Deeper Waters_**

* * *

* _When did this all begin? I thought, the first time you smiled at me,_

 _The moment you held my hand,_

 _You were already mine…*_

When he laid foot on Higurashi Shrine, Sesshomaru had to hold his breath. Hundreds of lanterns had lit up the ancient grounds, decorating the ornate trees around. Even the Goshinboku was not spared. From the river behind the mansion was an unusual curtain of ethereal light. It was firefly season, and the little flickers of light arose from the earth, drifting like a gentle, magical sigh from the ground, offering a soft kiss to the starry laden sky. More people than he had ever seen were milling about.

It was a completely different place, and he had felt, he was transported into another era.

Everyone was in formal kimonos, the sound of getas on the stone pavement, the clacking wood from the numerous _Ema_ and wind-chimes drifted through the air, like distant bells from a faraway land.

And he saw her: she was a completely different person, his little Shrine Girl, as she greeted the guests with a smile and a polite bow.

Her hair was not in her usual messy bun. She was not wearing those rag-colored Yukatas a size too big. And she did not have dirty smears on her cheeks.

Her hair was unbound, spilling in waves like black silk past her waist, her Miko garb crisp and clean, the fiery red hakama tight on her small waist, her haori hiding her hidden curves that only he had felt and known throughout the years.

She held a beautiful red flush on her cheeks from the exhilaration of the evening, and her lips were painted a light pink, as she smiled in warm greeting at the guests.

One of the western visitors with foreign blond hair took her hand and kissed it.

He knew it was a mere tradition in other countries. But then the stranger reached out and tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear-

The same ebony hair Sesshomaru had been entangling his hands, and only his hands, playfully between his fingers for the past hundred and forty-seven years.

A fire of jealousy erupted from deep inside his consciousness, so much that it almost blinded him, his vision blurring and teetering, the grounds under his very feet shaking.

And she blushed, and he found his feet moving on its own towards the laughing woman.

"Kagome." He said, and the pair turned around.

"Ah, it's Sesshomaru-sama!" She cried out happily. She closed the gap between them, flinging her arms around his waist, burying her face in his kimono-clad chest.

From above her head he gave the foreigner a hard look, and the grey-eyed young man smiled cordially as he stepped away.

Sesshomaru brought his attention back to the woman in his arms, as she giggled at his presence.

* _You were crying that afternoon we parted,_

 _And I think I realize why._

 _Please, let my suspicions be right…*_

"I was expecting you to come earlier," she commented offhandedly, and she went on rambling about something else. But then again, he found himself very distracted.

The scent of her hair, the warmth of her skin,

and the tautness of her flesh on his fingers,

A heat like never before consumed him, and he found his hands wandering the broad of her back, exploring the curves of her waist unashamedly.

"Sesshomaru-sama,"

He stopped. Kagome was looking up at him with a familiar warm expression, as she reached out and cupped his face with her hands. "I was asking you if you are in a formal kimono right now."

He had to take a minute to retrieve himself before he could answer, already too intoxicated in his woman's presence. "Yes."

The Shrine Girl's fingers shyly ran through the hem of his silk collar, "Can you describe to me in detail… the pattern and design?" She looked down and blushed. "I've never seen you in a formal kimono before, and I probably never will. So maybe I can paint a picture of you in my head,"

To her surprise the inuyoukai gently took her hands, she had to tiptoe and lean closer to him, and the heat of their bodies so close made the air around him feel suffocating,

A torture he did not want to get out of.

"My kimono is mostly white silk," he started, running her fingers on the broad of his shoulders, "But on my sleeves and on the collar, are red and white cherry blossoms, our family crest…" He splayed her hands across his chest, and a burning heat immediately spread underneath his skin like wildfire.

"On my waist is a yellow sash with purple smoke-like patterns…" Sesshomaru dragged her palms across the entire length of his upper body, her hands leaving a trail of electricity and fire in its wake. She remained silent the whole time.

He never noticed, but Kagome's breathing was getting shallow, and the Inuyoukai himself was feeling out of breath.

He settled her hands on his waist, letting her feel his sash, "And I am… wearing a sashinuki hakama…" he trailed off, as he slowly dragged her hands lower, and Kagome's cheeks bloomed into a pretty blush.

Someone cleared their throat from behind, obnoxiously, and Sesshomaru and Kagome sharply turned around. It was an old human woman, glaring at them, all the while shaking her head and muttering, "Kids these days! They just don't know the word _self-control_!"

Kagome pulled away.

"Ah, thank you for the visual, Sesshomaru-sama!" She stepped back, her heavy blush somehow giving the Inu a sense of relief. "I'm sure you look good in what you're wearing right now… not that you don't always look good… in fact, who am I kidding! You were always beautiful since we were little…" She shook her head nervously, "I mean… enjoy your stay here at the shrine?" She hung her head in defeat, and Sesshomaru felt as if a heavy weight was lifted off him.

* _Please, let my suspicions be right…*_

She was rambling nonsense again, the way she always did whenever she got flustered with his touch. And seeds of hope bloomed from inside him, fed by the possibility that he might still hold her affections after all.

"How about me?" She suddenly asked, and he brought his gaze back to her. She was looking away, avoiding his face. "What do you think of me?"

Sesshomaru held his tongue. What was he to say? She was beautiful. Always had been beautiful, even with paint on her cheeks and snot on her nose he would have taken her then and there,

But the Inuyoukai realized, his speech was frozen.

He was too ashamed to tell her.

After all these years of seeing her as a little child, he found out he didn't know how to talk to this… woman… who was drowning his thoughts and taking his breath away with every single movement. But she was waiting for an answer, and unwittingly, he reverted back to his usual treatment of her, at loss of what to do.

"Acceptable." He blurted out, and the woman pouted, the blush replaced with a disappointed frown.

"Acceptable?" She fell silent. "I had Kikyo-chan paint my lips and do my hair… Stupid Sesshomaru-sama." She mumbled, and then softly, under her breath, she whispered. "I bet Ayumi-sama was really beautiful, and I am nothing compared to her,"

The Daiyoukai reached out and grabbed her wrist. "Listen," he pulled her closer, "I want to make it clear between both of us. I have already chosen."

In that very instant, Kagome froze. He stood confused, as her unseeing blue eyes darkened, and tears immediately brimmed on the corners. Inevitably her sorrow spilled, down her cheeks, as her lips were parted open in a mix of despair and heartbreak.

She shook her head as she pulled away. "I don't want to hear it," she whimpered, and a crushing feeling descended on the Inuyoukai.

* _Were my suspicions wrong?_

 _Is she… rejecting me?*_

The crushing feeling slowly flared into a simmering anger, and only when Kagome shook her head again did the simmer spark into a full-blown conflagration. His grip on her grew roughly tight. His fingers dug into her soft skin. "What, Shrine Girl? What is it that you don't want to hear?!"

"Kagome!" An unfamiliar voice called out, and that gave the shrine girl a chance to pull away.

She wiped the tears away from her face, "Gomen nasai. I have to help Kikyo-chan with the shrine." She bowed. His gaze fell on the two newcomers before him, her cousin named Kikyo, and her little brother Souta.

The boy smiled at him cheerily and waved, "Hello, Sesshomaru-sama!" He said, and the Inu nodded his acknowledgment.

Without another word, Kagome started towards them.

"Shrine Girl," he called out, and she paused, not looking back. "Meet me at the flower bed after the festival. We're not done yet."

A long silence passed them both, before she sniffled again, "Hai, Sesshomaru-sama."

He watched her walk away, heartbroken and confused as hell. And he did not know, that the Shrine Girl was feeling the same.

* * *

The night was getting deeper, and the people were getting few and far between. The guests had trickled out as the ceremonies had already concluded. He wandered aimlessly on the grounds, too distracted to concentrate on anything. He entered the large _Kagura-den_ , and he found that it was too crowded, at least from what he was used to.

Kagome's unfinished mural was there, a magnificent painting of lifelike sakura trees that ran half the span of the wall, and a group of teens posing for "selfies" was inside.

Sesshomaru fled, past the rows of Ema, past the small auxiliary shrines, through the towering Komainus, and into the Oratory Hall. He had no intentions of praying, but to calm himself down.

Much to his surprise, there seemed to be no one else there. And so he stood still in the silence of the Haiden, swimming in his thoughts. The night was almost over but he felt as if there was a heavy downpour in his mind, and the sting of rejection kept on stabbing him over and over again.

* _Am I really too late?*_

He sighed deeply, and everything was quiet until he heard the bell softly ring.

Sesshomaru turned to his side. There was a woman with warm eyes and black hair, looking about the physical age of his father, standing not too far away. She was giving him a sidelong glance and she shook her head.

She stepped back. "Such _youth_ … and you sigh as if you are burdening the problems of the whole world." Her gaze drifted back to the structure in front of her. "I am an old woman, and I'm not even complaining of my aching bones," she clucked her tongue.

The Daiyoukai tried to hide his irritation. "Such _maturity_ , and you judge as if you knew someone in one look alone." His golden eyes gave her his own sidelong glance.

"Oh?" The woman smiled. "Well, my bad," she bowed her head, "I'm sorry for the disrespect. So you are youkai then? If you don't mind, may I ask exactly how old you are?"

Sesshomaru brought his glance back to the large donation box, not wanting to engage in useless chatter. His emotions were still running rampant inside him, and he was having a hard time quelling it. The Daiyoukai felt rather guilty for snapping back at the woman. Sesshomaru shifted as he prepared to make his way to the Heiden when the woman began talking again.

"White hair and golden eyes, a constant frown and an arrogant, beautiful face…. might you be Kagome-chan's Sesshomaru?" The woman said, and in that instant, she ensnared his attention. "Congratulations," she continued.

"For what?" He tilted his head, confused.

"For having finally chosen, you said it yourself." She simply answered, and before Sesshomaru could comprehend how the stranger knew about that, the woman sighed. "I've known Kagome-chan since she was a little child. I would always find her here every day. You can probably say… I'm one of her closest friends."

Sesshomaru remained quiet, and the woman took it as a sign to continue.

"Ever since she learned to walk, she would be here in the shrine, praying relentlessly for one single person."

She turned to him. "But what amazes me is how her prayers had evolved from the simple little phrases of a toddler, into the genuine sentiments of a woman who has lived as long as she had…

and how the very essence of her prayer didn't really change, after all those years."

Sesshomaru's hold to his hakama tightened.

"She prays for you." The woman smiled, "Every single day, without fail…for her white-haired, golden-eyed Inu, who is stubborn and oftentimes blunt. She prays that the Kamis keep you safe from harm wherever you are, that they lift your spirits up when you find yourself discouraged.

And she prays for your happiness.

That woman, she never forgets to thank the Kamis every day, for the chance to get to know you in this lifetime… and if there was such a thing as another, she wishes that she may get to know you in the next… and all other lifetimes that will follow."

The woman shook her head.

"Only until last week her prayers had changed. I would find her in tears and heartbroken. Don't get me wrong, she still prays for you, but this time she prays for herself too. She pleads, that she will be able to bear whatever decisions you make,"

Sesshomaru's brows met in confusion,

"Today, just before you came in I found her in here, on her knees and crying again.

She was telling me you had finally chosen, and she was praying that she would have the strength to be happy for you and that woman named Ayumi…"

The Inuyoukai drew back, "I never said I chose that stranger-"

The woman tucked a strand of her black hair that had been displaced by the gentle breeze, "Such a selfless woman, isn't she?" She chuckled, "A heart as pure as hers, they're so hard to come by, ne?" and she turned towards the Inu for confirmation, but she found that he had already started to walk away.

He suddenly paused, and he turned to her. "Thank you," Sesshomaru said, and the woman just raised a brow at him and gave him a knowing smile.

"Anything for my Kagome-chan." She answered. "Whoever her friends are, they're also mine."

"What is your name?" He asked.

The woman held her warm smile. She turned back to the Haiden and closed her eyes. She clapped her hands at the start of a prayer. Without looking back at him, she shook her head as if in annoyance. "Just call me Midoriko."

And Sesshomaru nodded, "Arigatou," he bowed again, and he quickly made his way outside.

He was met by another group of patrons that were headed in. "We're lucky," the man said to his companion, "it's empty."

The daiyoukai paused, as he turned and looked back. The shrine was lonely, the only presence was the numerous paper lanterns dancing softly with the wind. He shrugged and continued his way.

He had something more important to attend to.

* * *

He found her waiting in the lily bed by the stream, her figure silhouetted by the rising fireflies from the river. She turned when she noticed his presence, and her aura had reeked of tears and confusion.

Despite all that, she forced a bitter smile.

"Sesshomaru-sama," she acknowledged, struggling to hold back the tears in her eyes. "How was your evening?"

Without any words, he strode towards her, and reached out and crushed her in his arms. She stiffened at the sudden contact, and she bit her lips.

"Stupid Shrine Girl," he said, and he felt her entire body tremble. "Why would you think I'd choose anyone else above you?" Her shoulders shook as she cried again. And he held her tighter, bracing her in his arms as her knees grew weak.

"I don't want any ridiculous assumptions, no more misunderstandings," Sesshomaru said as she clung to him tighter, her tears soaking his kimono. She nodded her head. "Kagome, I've never taken a lover before. You are my first, and you will be my last.

So if you're having second thoughts, if what you feel is just childish infatuation, I want you to spare us from the pain of being asunder and back out as early as now,"

The Shrine girl gently pulled away, and she lifted her unseeing gaze to him. She reached out and he eagerly received her, as her hands gently trailed the outline of his face, and she rested her palms on his cheeks. "Sesshomaru-sama," she answered, "When someone devotes her entire life, the whole hundred and forty-seven years of it, to one single person… would you still dare to call it _infatuation_?"

She did not need to speak anymore. The Inuyoukai pulled the woman closer, and he pressed his lips against hers. She sighed at the blissful contact. He felt her legs finally give way as her weight slumped in his arms, but he held her, as he prodded her mouth open, and she invited his tongue in, deepening their kiss.

* _When did all of this begin?_

 _I thought you were already mine… but I had been wrong._

 _I didn't realize I was already at your feet,_

 _It was I who belonged completely to you,_

 _The moment you smiled at me and held my hand,_

 _the day the Maple leaves and Sakura blossoms fell like rain.*_

Underneath the dome of a million stars, nestled between the Sakura and fire trees, the flickering lights of the fireflies that rose from the ground were a silent witness, and the wind wrapped around them in a gentle song of happiness, as the two childhood friends who were now lovers shared a sweeter, more intimate side of each other they never thought had existed.

* * *

Only three days had passed since that night, and the Inuyoukai found himself standing beside his Shrine Girl by the Torii gates, as they waved goodbye to their fathers and the rest of the council. The heat of the day was sweltering and the sun was at its highest peak in the sky. The elders had to leave in the middle of the day. They were off to another region for an important meet, and they would have to be gone for a whole week.

Kagome darted to her father to give him one last hug.

Kyoshiro looked over her head and directed a burning gaze towards the Inu in silent warning.

Being the daiyoukai that he was, Sesshomaru was the one tasked by the council to watch over the Shrine and its constituents.

 ** _"_** ** _Son, I see the way you have been looking at Kagome-chan… I am aware." Touga had said, the day before their departure. "I want to deny it because it would complicate our relations with the Higurashis. I want to ask you to choose another…_**

 ** _But I can't._**

 ** _That woman is an impeccable choice. And I am happy for you, for having decided on her. But one thing I ask… wait until my return._**

 ** _We'll try to help you through this. Kyoshiro-sama is a formidable opponent, I'm sure he won't be pleased, once he finds out."_**

The council entered their sedans, and they drove off, out of sight. Kagome turned and ran towards him, and she stopped before the Inu, giddy. The breeze was humid, a damp heat hung heavily in the air.

 _*A whole week with her…*_

Sweat was dripping off from her temples, running to the graceful curve of her neck, and she swatted a strand of her black hair that clung to her skin. "Sesshomaru-sama, let's go inside. We have chilled watermelons in the fridge," She said innocuously, but he did not hear a word.

The drops of sweat ran, from her neck to the swell of her chest, disappearing into the cloth that bound her breasts.

And he thought, were they as soft as it looked?

Was the rest of her skin, the parts hidden underneath her yukata, as smooth as her face?

What would it feel… with his bare hands?

 _*Father…I don't think I can control myself,*_

"Sesshomaru-sama, are you alright?" She held his hand and that seemed to snap him back temporarily, and he tried to concentrate on her warmth. When their eyes met, she heaved a sigh of relief and smiled. "Ready?" She tugged him along, towards the large mansion.

"Of course," he answered absently.

 _*I am.. in deep trouble.*_


	14. Summer Solstice

**_A/N:_** I know I'm supposed to finish my other fics. And I have started to write another one in my trusty mac, another one filled with angst. :( I need to stop torturing them both.

Kind of a lemon ahead, so be warned. And I (just) know you'll gasp at the end of this chapter, ("how could you?!" You'll tell me, ;P) I'll try to upload the next as soon as it is ready, I just feel this is the right flow. :)

(Spoiler:And for this chapter, _the answer to her question_ will be revealed on the next update. ;) )

* * *

 ** _Summer Solstice_**

* * *

 _Lately you have been asking me_

 _The same question, over and over again…_

"Why do you hold back when others are around?" The Shrine Girl asked, when she was pulling out the weeds from the lily bed that they planted by the shallow river.

"Why do you ask?" He answered, tilting his head towards her. Lazily he leaned on the nearby tree. His brows met in annoyance, as his gaze was intent on his woman.

She turned to him and offered him a bright smile. "I just thought, Yumi and her lover… I see them hold hands, he whispers to her sweet nothings…

Aren't all lovers supposed to do that? I wish you would do that to me too…" she pouted.

 _I know the answer._

 _But Kagome… you will never know._

Sesshomaru scoffed. "I despise blatant displays of affection. It only provides a false sense of security, what are you trying to prove and to whom?" He ran his hands through his hair. "The others, they have nothing to do with us and our love." Sesshomaru's breath was suddenly knocked out of his lungs-

The girl had engulfed him in a tight embrace.

"I had been wondering…" she whispered, "If you chose me because you truly loved me, or you felt obligated to, because of what happened on this river."

Sesshomaru's grip on her waist grew tighter. "Why would you say that?"

She dug her face into the crook of his neck. "Sesshomaru… you never really said anything to me about how you felt…"

 _I can't… tell you._

 _I'm sorry._

He looked away. "If words are your only basis of such complex emotions, then you really are as immature as I thought you still were."

The girl stiffened, and she fell silent for a long time. "I'll wait." She finally said, "I'll wait… until you say those three words to me out loud, until you won't be ashamed to hold my hand when other people are around." She pulled away slightly, and the Inuyoukai was surprised to see she held a smile on her lips. "I know you do, deep inside you are hopelessly in love with me," she proclaimed cheekily, "You're just too embarrassed to say it. Am I right?"

 _No… I'm not embarrassed…_

 _That's not the real reason,_

The Inu scoffed again, a brow quirking upward. "You are one confident little brat," Sesshomaru chuckled, leaning over to nip at her ears. The woman laughed as she slipped away from his grasp, and stopped herself on the edge of the river.

She took a deep breath, and turned to Sesshomaru.

The sun's rays glistened as it hit the water, creating little golden sparkles behind her miko-clad form. The fiery red leaves of the Japanese Maple rained on her warm, sheltering presence, and the wind sang a distant lullaby that reminded him of the day she first confessed to him.

With a heavy, pretty flush of red to her cheeks, Kagome's eyes connected with his.

"I love you, Sesshomaru," She said, and he sat there, unable to think, overwhelmed by the maelstrom of emotions those simple three words brought down on him.

"Please listen,

Because I want you to know this,

Because I need you to always remember. I love you."

The Inu stood up, and Kagome smiled, her pretty blush getting heavier as he slowly stepped, closer and closer to her, "I will love you until my bones grow brittle,

I will love you until my last breath…

If in this life we end up losing each other,

I will find you in the next… "

 _It is… This… fear in me…_

 _That is growing deep inside,_

"And then I will love you more,

Until my soul exhausts, until I am but a remnant of this fleeting world."

He wrapped her in his arms, her warmth overwhelming his senses, her proclamations intoxicating his soul. "Stupid Shrine Girl. What is all this melodrama about?" He kissed her forehead, and she giggled when he lurched down, his breath tickling her neck. And he pulled her closer, his lips claiming hers. The woman sighed as she relaxed in his hold, as his hands ran through the silken strands of her ebony hair.

 _I will never tell my secret…_

 _Kagome, you will never know._

He crushed her body against his until there was no possible space between them left. And his tongue danced against hers, attempting to satisfy this terrible thirst that he knew only she could quench.

She moaned, protesting his sudden roughness, and that horrible fire ran through his spine, spreading across his body. She involuntarily giggled when he tried to nip at her ears again, and she pushed away.

"Stop," she said in between laughs, but the Inu was not quite done. He pulled her closer and nipped at her neck this time, and she flinched in reflex.

Her foot slipped at the smooth stone they were standing on, and the pair realized they were falling backwards.

A loud splash bounced through the hidden nook of the forest, and Sesshomaru opened his eyes, his gaze immediately settling on his woman. "Are you alright?!"

She squirmed underneath him and he pulled away, supporting her to stand. And once she did, he had to take two steps back. The fire that invaded him flared inside his consciousness, consuming him, affecting his vision. He had to blink several times as his instincts seized his sanity and enchained his limbs.

"Sesshomaru, are you okay?" She stepped forward but he stepped back.

"I… I am," he rasped. His throat hurt, and his fingers twitched.

His woman was right in front of him, soaking wet from the premature plunge. The silks that covered her were drenched, sticking on her skin, conforming so sensually to her hidden curves that he now was able to see.

"Kagome," he could only say, as he helplessly reached out to her, his hands itching terribly so, the fire inside him throbbing into feverous heights he thought he would shrivel from the sickening heat. "Kagome," he mumbled, as he pulled her close and his lips came crashing against hers. She moaned when his hands slipped into the folds of her haori, and his fingers finally found the edges of her breast binds.

"S-Sesshomaru…" she croaked, when he suddenly pulled the cloth down, "I feel… strange," she gasped when his hands finally touched forbidden skin.

 _I want you to feel me,_

 _Feel none other than me,_

He cupped one breast on his bare hands, feeling the weight, heavy on his fingers, soft and smooth as he had imagined. Her knees gave way and she lost her strength. He eased her to the knee-depth river, settling her on his lap. And he slid his other hand inside her haori, to fondle the other neglected mound of soft flesh.

"Sesshomaru," she sighed, her fingers digging deep into his hair, trying to stabilize her teetering world,

 _I want to be… buried deep inside of you…_

 _That you feel only me,_

 _That you live and breathe my name…_

He felt her tip peak, the moment his thumb brushed the sensitive nub. And she sat there, her lips parted in a sigh, her eyes absently watching the patches of golden light that were peeking through the canopy of the fire trees as she allowed him to continue his ministrations, kneading her soft flesh that was heating up in his touch.

 _Because that is how I feel about you._

She whimpered as he started to part her haori, and his hand slid lower, towards soft curls and softer, wet skin…

"Onee-san!" Souta's voice drifted through the towering trees, "Sesshomaru-sama! Are you guys here?" and that was enough to snap them both from the spell they were in. He pulled away and he closed her haori. She slumped on his form like a limp doll, arms around his shoulders, overwhelmed by the encounter.

 _And the answer to your question…_

 _My woman, I will never tell._

* * *

The daiyoukai was exhausted, restraining himself and his lust for his Shrine Girl the entire day. Short encounters in the hallways. Subtle touches when they parted after meals. Her little laughs, her adorable pouts.

 ** _And there was the memory of them in the river, two days ago, of her soft, wet skin…_**

 ** _Her little gasps when he fondled her stiffened nubs, as he kneaded through her bare, generous breasts…_**

Two days. Only two days into the week and the feverish fire had not been doused for the poor Inu. His jaw clenched in restraint, as he tried to hold back his grunts that would surely echo against the wooden hallways of the old Higurashi mansion.

 ** _When she slumped against him, those soft mounds crushed against his chest, and when she readjusted herself, the cloth that stuck to her skin rubbed against him,_**

His breathing paced faster. Sweat ran down his bare chest. His grip on his hardened cock tightened, as he stroked the sensitive head, slowly towards the base. The image of her slick, wet skin rubbing against his stuck in his mind.

 _Her breasts crushed against his body… what would it feel… without her haori on? What would it feel… with her underneath him,_

His hands stroked faster, pulling his skin with his palms, the sweet friction making him hiss in frustration as he thought of her sweet lips moaning out his name. Then the world suddenly flashed, as his thick seed carelessly spilled out, dripping down his arm, onto the immaculately clean sheets.

Sesshomaru breathed out his relief when a sharp knock on the door jolted him to his senses. Before he could pull his hakama up, the reason for his nightly torture was on the doorway- with her a half-full basket of dirty clothes on her hands.

"Sesshomaru-sama, good evening." She bowed lightly, and stepped inside his room. "Do you have any clothes that need washing for tomorrow?" Her nose scrunched up, as she felt the air around her. "Your youki… it's all over the place. Is there anything wrong?"

The daiyoukai could only stare at her, too stunned at her entry and her nonchalant reaction. Did she not realize he had no pants on?

And then it hit him, and he wanted to slap his hand at his forehead for being such an idiot.

She cannot see. She is **_blind_**.

He could hear her frustrated sigh. "Now how am I supposed to finish this chore and go to sleep, if you just stand there and not help me?" she strode past him and sat on the floor, on the side of his bed, placing the basket beside her. "Stupid Sesshomaru-sama,"

His eyes flew wide as she leaned against the mattress, "Shrine Girl-" he snapped, but before he could pull her away, her hand rested on a certain part of the floor…

On the side of the bed…

That specific side where his seed spilled in great amounts on his sheets, that dripped to the floor below.

Kagome held her hand up to her face, her unseeing eyes darkening, her brows meeting in confusion. Her face was in a frown as she tried to comprehend what that… wet thing… was, that had stuck to her hand and started running down her arms. "Eh? What is this?" She sniffed the substance,

and Sesshomaru stiffened.

"You're keeping food in here?" His fatally naive Shrine Girl tilted her head, and he watched as if everything was in slow motion…

Her little pink tongue darted out to take a taste.

She pulled away and grimaced. And she could not see, right in front of her was the Daiyoukai, standing motionless as if in a heavy spell, his eyes teetering from gold to red.

"How… does it taste like?" He asked huskily, backing away from her, slowly towards the open door. She remained to squat by the bed, an innocent pout on her lips as she struggled to find the exact words.

"It tastes… strange…"

 _Strange._ That very word she used to describe how she felt when he touched her in the river. And his fingers tingled at the memory of the sensation, the fire slowly burning up inside him again. And he felt that familiar ache in his nether regions, and he cursed the full moon outside the window, as it spilled in his dark room, illuminating their figures.

It was telling him it was summer solstice… that it was the peak of his mating clock. The cries of the cicadas reminded him he was alone with the woman he loved, who was not completely his yet…

"Do you want to know… where that strange thing came from?" He asked, and she paused, hesitating with his tone. The heat of the summer night sweltered around them, and he staggered from his feet like a drunk, intoxicated by the scent of his woman so close to him, dizzy with her presence and nervous energy.

"I…" she hesitated, and he cast his head down, hiding his face with the shade of his blinding white hair. He knew she could not see, but this was embarrassing, what he was about to demand from her:

"Say yes." He pleaded, a desperation in his voice that made the woman hold her breath, "I beg you, Kagome. Say yes."

He watched as a pretty blush rose on her cheeks, and his love for her swelled inside him that he thought he would drown.

"Y-yes," she finally answered.

Sesshomaru closed the door behind him, and it clicked audibly, signaling it was locked.

And it left him and his chosen woman alone in the room, and he strode towards her, with only the moonlight to guide his drunken vision.


	15. Promise

**_A/N:_** **So the first half would be Sesshomaru's POV.** But it won't stay that way, so expect the POVs to switch. You'll know, though. I tried my best to make it distinguishable.

 ** _Lemons ahead._** You were warned.

Thanks for the support. Thank you, really.

on a side note: no. Still blind. As i mentioned on the past chapter, she recognizes energy signatures and creates images of things in her mind.

and yes, still in the past. Her father is still alive, this should be clue enough. Thanks!

* * *

 ** _Promise_**

* * *

 _You will never know_

 _How much you mean to me,_

"Sesshomaru-sama?" She asked so quietly, the downpour of the summer rain drowning the silence of the heavy, humid air. But he did not hear, his heart was thundering as loud as drums, and the rush of his blood in his ears was so loud he thought he'd go deaf. He stood unmoving in the dim of the moonlight, waiting.

 _It is this… fear,_

 _That grows with every smile you so foolishly give,_

 _With every touch, I melt… helplessly into nothing…_

"Take your clothes off," he said, and she stiffened. With conscious modesty, she crossed her arms protectively across her chest, but he strode forward and knelt before her, parting her haori so that it slid off her shoulders, falling on the floor. He fumbled on the knot of her hakama and it slid down her hips, and he pulled it off her legs. Now exposed, goosebumps rose on her naked skin as he wrapped her in a tight embrace.

Her cheeks flushed beautifully when she realized they were both bare.

Sesshomaru sighed and he closed his eyes. Images of his beloved Shrine Girl from the first time they met, flashed in his mind; her first confession to him on the shrine steps, and of them both laying on the grass- smiling so freely, pointing at the vast blue sky-

The Inu could not restrain himself. He held his breath.

The woman frowned when she felt little wet drops streak across her skin. Her unseeing blue eyes searched in worry, and her concern only crushed his heart in frustration: his tears fell into torrents, dropping in great amounts it pattered to the wooden floor. "Sesshomaru," she whispered, as she relaxed, wrapping him in her familiar warmth.

Sesshomaru clung to her tightly, and the great Daiyoukai's body trembled from his anguish.

 _If answering the question you ask of me,_

 _If telling you those three words you so yearn for_

 _Shall quell that unrest in your soul,_

 _Then I will never give you fulfillment._

He pulled away and kissed her. Sesshomaru crushed her sweet lips against his, raking his fingers through her soft hair, and yanked her closer. Prodding her mouth open, he whimpered in desperation as he lifted her to his lap, his arms around her small, fragile frame and crushed her soft body against his.

She tensed when his hair tickled her breasts, the grip to his back tightening as her nails dug into his skin:

"I feel… strange…" she whispered, as he dipped down and pressed his ear on her form, and his frustration streaked down her exposed chest. He stayed still for long moments, quietly crying in her warm embrace.

The Shrine Girl realized the cause of his stillness… he was listening to her heart.

And the Inu realized, he could not stop the tears that so freely, shamelessly flowed. He listened to every beat of her selfless, loving heart, drowning in the warmth that he so loved and selfishly wanted all for himself, a maelstrom of emotions stirring up his soul, exposing his own vulnerability.

 _For how much you love me, I love you a million times more._

 _But you will never know._

 _Kagome, you will never know._

 _I love you more than my life, more than anything else in this world,_

 _But I will never let you hear it from me,_

 _I will let you chase me, I will let you keep on guessing…_

Her hackles stood when his breath fluttered on her exposed mounds, and she grabbed his hair, squirming in torture when his strong, muscular tongue started lapping on her hardened nub. "Sesshomaru," she writhed, "I…this is,"

She was burning. Every teasing scrape, every wanton suck seemed to escalate the frustrating, electrifying sensation that was pooling in her core, and his golden eyes watched her in a terrible, aching desire, never satisfied, craving for more.

He captured her other neglected breast, and she whimpered, burying her face in the crook of his neck. "Keep your voice down," he whispered, taking her hand and leading it down to his large, throbbing manhood. "We don't want them to hear."

He wrapped her hand around his cock, and it jerked when it came in contact with her skin. "Squeeze it harder, shrine girl," he hissed when she put more pressure, and it throbbed when he guided her small hand, from the base to the already wet tip, pre-cum oozing out of his shaft.

"Sesshomaru, is this… is this where it came from?" She asked so innocently, and he groaned when her thumb swirled around his painfully sensitive opening,

And she squeezed.

He stopped her, snarling.

Startled, Kagome pulled away. But his hand kept her to where it was at, and with a shaky breath she started to stroke his hard length again,

"Yes," he snarled, "Kagome, yes…"

And without warning, his hand slid in between her thighs.

Her knees bucked when his fingers stroked her already wet slit. And a fire threatened to overwhelm her when he continued the heavy petting, coaxing her hesitant flesh to warm up to his invasion. She tried to shut her legs closed but he found her knot of pleasure, and he swirled his finger on her fissure. Kagome moaned, slumping on his shoulders, overwhelmed and losing bodily control.

"Sesshomaru," she mewled, and he rubbed her sensitive, slick clit with his thumb, already feeling her flesh twitch in delicious torment.

"Don't stop touching me, Kagome," he coaxed, and with shaky hands, she tried so hard to comply. The Inu savored at her palms stroking his throbbing cock, and he felt her quiver when he parted her folds open.

He thrust a finger inside. She gasped, tears streaking down her eyes when his finger curled inside her, all the while his thumb relentlessly kneading her bundle of nerves, her center of pleasure. He stroked her soft flesh from the inside, he could feel her muscles clamping down, and she sobbed as he continued to play with her nectar-coated core.

"What is it," he crooned, when she started moving on her own, her hips grinding up and down, panting as she pushed down his penetrated finger greedily into her slick sex,

"It's not enough," she pleaded, "I, I don't understand… it seems like-"

Sesshomaru repositioned her, and she suddenly found the length of his hard cock rubbing against her raw, private flesh. The lovers both moaned in ecstasy, unable to control their cries for lust. He thrust, his staff eating into the gape of her sheath, and she rubbed hard, the wet friction between them escalating their delicious pleasure.

Sesshomaru snarled and his seed spilled, coating his dick, spilling on the opening of her slit, and he growled as his eyes bled scarlet.

His claws lengthened, digging into her skin.

"Let me inside you," he rasped, "I want to be buried deep inside you," he swiped his finger on his cum-coated shaft, and he spread the thick substance on her nether lips, rubbing to on her clit, teasing her folds with his hot cum. Finally, he spread her slit yet again and invaded her with his seed-coated digits, allowing her womanhood to have a taste of his loyal love for her.

"All of you, mine-" he nipped at her neck, drawing blood. But the shrine girl was too lost in euphoria to feel any pain, and she submitted to his shameless ministrations like a heavily drugged woman. And he smiled, seeing her flushed and helpless in his touch.

"Yours," she whispered. He withdrew his fingers, his cum-covered shaft teasing into the very opening of her pussy.

"Yes," he grabbed her by the side of her shoulders, "All mine."

And he slammed his entire length into her, mercilessly to the hilt, and she cried out in pain. He groaned as he pushed her back on the wooden floor, her back slamming against the tatami. He roughly yanked her sideways and lifted her leg up, allowing him to go even deeper, his shaft hitting her fragile womb.

"It hurts," she cried out, "Sesshomaru, it hurts!"

He clenched his teeth in restraint when he pulled out, almost completely, but he could not control himself. "I'm sorry, Kagome," He rammed his cock back into her, and her nails raked the wooden floor in desperation,

"It will feel better, I promise it will feel better," he captured her moans with his lips, drowning her sobs with a deep, desperate open-mouthed kiss. The Inu devoured his woman, as he himself was enraptured by the flames of their sweet lovemaking. He drove into her, the sound of wet skin slapping against skin.

He had started to establish an impatient, violent rhythm, but she had no complaints. The pain was mixed with too much pleasure the shrine girl thought she would burst into flames of rapture. Her tight muscles seemed to relax with every thrust, and her lithe, sweat-glistening body arched up to meet him. "I love you, Sesshomaru," she said breathlessly, as the mix of the blood from her virginity and her own thick nectar sucked his cock into her wanting flesh, "I love you,"

He slid his length, in and out of her hot core, unable to hold his own moans of pleasure.

He lifted her other leg up, and she wrapped them around his waist. He bore down all his weight on her, crushing her generous breasts under his bare chest and the Inu started pumping, trying to reach deeper into her, pounding like a wild animal into his woman. He kissed the trail of her tears with his lips, as she tried to stifle her moans of ecstasy without avail. And he continued to slam against her, fucking his woman until all he could feel was her.

"Something's coming," she moaned, "Sesshomaru- something is," and she left all abandon. Her toes curled in orgasm, a wonderful explosion filling her being. She convulsed, her inner walls contracted, clenching his love-drunk, painfully hard member inside her.

And he bared his fangs and he clamped down on her neck, her blood dripping in great amounts on her creamy skin, as the world around him shattered. He released his seed inside her.

His love was too much for her womb to take in, because it oozed out of her slit, overflowing out of her sheath, dripping on her thighs to the floor.

His youki rushed into her veins, and her mana melted into his. And they laid still for long moments, listening to each other's breathing, basking in their aftermath of their untamed fucking.

He pulled out from her, the terrible emptiness immediately filling his soul. He braced his hands at her side and he pushed himself up, "Kagome," he whispered, his silver hair falling over his shoulders, isolating him and the woman he loved from the moonlit night.

The cries of the cicadas immediately filled the silence, and he searched her painfully blue eyes in shame of what he was about to ask of her,

"It's alright," she answered, already knowing what he needed. Kagome reached out, resting a hand on his warm cheek, "I am yours now,"

He took her wrist and kissed her hand, "Kagome," he hesitated,

He bent down and kissed her lips, trailing down to her jawline, to the crook of her neck,

And he lapped at her mark,

Their mating mark, the promise of his undying devotion to her,

A symbol of his vow that will go beyond death.

"I am yours now, " she continued, "And I am yours forever," she professed, "So do anything you want with me, Sesshomaru.

I want it too."

He wanted her to take a quick rest. He wanted to give her time to take in what had just happened between them tonight, but his member already throbbed painfully in anticipation. It had hardened again in arousal, the moment he pulled out and saw his woman laid down before him,

bound completely to him, body, mind, and soul.

"I'm sorry, Kagome." He said as he thrust his steel-hard cock back into her velvet folds, and he started moving again, building into that sweet, primal rhythm that would escalate him again into feverish heights.

 _Only to me. Completely mine._

"I love you, Sesshomaru," she sighed, and the couple, now mates, bound together as long as they lived, shared a deeper level of intimacy that they never knew existed. And as they pounded away into familiar delirious pleasure, she did not notice,

tears fell yet again from the Inu's beautiful golden eyes.

 _What I fear the most, my woman,_

 _Is that if you find yourself satisfied, that if I fulfill what you crave for,_

 _you will have no use for me anymore..._

 _And you will leave me._

 _This terrible fear that you will suddenly disappear from my sight,_

 _That I won't be able to feel your warmth…._

 _Kami, what will happen to me then?_

 _I will be left with nothing…_

 _So stay by my side forever, Kagome._

 _Please, don't leave me._

 _Don't ever leave me._

 _If you do, that will be the day my soul will cease to exist._

* * *

"Kagome," he whispered in the dark of the well house, "Spread your legs."

He felt her thighs tremble when he braced his hands between them, and his hard, muscular tongue penetrated into her folds. Her knees buckled but his head between them kept it open, and he continued to swirl his tongue inside, tasting her sweet womanly nectar.

"Sessh- Sesshomaru," she whimpered, her unseeing eyes fixed on the ceiling, glazed in a trance.

"Keep your voice down," he pulled away slightly, "Kagome, keep still," his tongue darted in again, and she bit her tongue, trying to hold back her moans. She tried to concentrate on the drumming on the roof, as the heavy rain poured on the well house.

They had to be very careful, the council was in the manor.

The week had been over before they knew it, and this was Sesshomaru's last evening in the Higurashi Grounds.

She sighed when he pulled away he hovered over her, as a familiar hardness prodded her womanhood open.

She blushed, as she pushed him away gently, her hands on the open of his haori. "I… I wanted to make you feel good too,"

The Daiyoukai paused, taking in what she had just said. The previous night he had taught her how to pleasure his cock with her little mouth, and the memory of her tongue running from his base to the tip of his shaft, the sinful cavern sucking his wanton manhood made his cock ache more painfully than before. "I'm sorry, Shrine Girl." He apologized, his breath tickling her face. "I don't think I can wait,"

She nodded her head in understanding, and she braced her arms around his neck as she prepared to take him in. And he did, in a tormentingly slow penetration, as they allowed themselves to build that familiar euphoric rhythm only the two of them knew.

Ever since he took her completely, she would come knocking at his door every night… willingly, seeking for his warmth inside her. And he would quietly comply because he wanted it too. And the little moments they had in the night had spilled into the daytime.

He would steal touches whenever no one else was around, pet her heavily, sometimes the Inu would even initiate quick little fucks in the most unthinkable places. He could not keep his hands off her.

And there were the quiet moments when she would reach for his hand under the table whenever they would share a meal, when they would sit beside each other on the clearing and he would describe to her, as best as he could, what the sky looked like-

He loved those moments, too…

As equally as they were making love.

He did not notice, his tears fell yet again, unchecked, as he thrust into his woman.

Kagome, his Shrine Girl…

Oh how he loved her so.

* * *

As he built their rhythm up, Kagome wiped his tears away and softly smiled.

She had always kept mum about it, but she knew.

She knew he loved her dearly. His desperate cling, his tears whenever they made love… she knew his frustration.

For everything that he had shown, she wanted to let him know that she felt the same way. But to the girl's vexation, she felt as if he thought that his love for her was more than she to him.

And it would always cross her mind; why would he ever think that way?

She loved him, more than anything in this world, more than herself. And she made sure that he knew, she reminded him every time they were together.

But somehow he still thought he loved her more.

And so she would ask him so many times, even after he marked her, to hear those three words from his mouth: "I love you",

Not for reassurance. She was only asking him... because she knew he needed her chase.

His rhythm grew more impatient and rough, and her world shattered around her in a frenzied euphoria. He slumped over her satiated body and laid still, she knew he was listening to her heart.

"I love you, Sesshomaru," she said in the silence of the torrential night, her hands stroking his silver hair. She kissed the crown of his head softly, as she felt familiar wet drops streak again on her bare skin. "I love you."

* * *

They said their goodbyes at the Torii gates. He left her his umbrella, afraid that she would be soaked on her way back to the mansion. And she waved at him, knowing that he would be back pretty soon. Her smile was genuine, even giddy, at the thought of the next weekend to come.

Kagome ran up the stairs, smiling to herself. Her plan was to go straight to the Oratory Hall to offer a prayer to her great ancestor, Midoriko- the founder of Higurashi Shrine,

And to the Kamis, for hearing her prayers…

But a looming shadow greeted her cheerful form as she was on her way. "Papa," she smiled as she looked up,

Kagome's smile faltered. His aura was absolutely malicious, it licked on her skin like prickles of thorns, "Papa, what's-"

"Where were you the whole evening, Kagome?"

She stepped back, confused. Why was he so… hostile?

"I was with Sesshomaru-sama-"

Rough, uncaring hands grabbed her shoulders. Startled, the girl lost grip of her umbrella and it fell on the ground, exposing her to the rain, soaking her immediately to the bone. Her unseeing eyes were wide open in fear.

Her protective, sheltering father… seemed like a total stranger.

"Papa, what's happening-" her hackles stood and she felt her knees lose strength. He grabbed a significant amount of hair from her scalp and yanked her head sideways, and she whimpered in pain. Tears spilled out of her eyes in immense confusion,

And the moment the side of her neck was revealed, his malicious energy flared, engulfing Kagome in a suffocating strangle. She gasped for breath, and her eyes searched for some meaning to this horrible, confusing moment-

"You mated him." He finally said, and goosebumps rode on her skin, the prickly, thorny aura overwhelming her entire soul. "You mated a DEMON!" He screamed madly, and a surge of offensive aura flared on his hand as he reached out to her mating mark.

The girl did not know what happened next. The only thing she knew was that she reflexively shut her eyes tight in fear.

Another eruption of bright red, demonic aura flared the darkness of the rainy night.

Her father was thrown several feet away. Kagome touched her mating mark- the source of the red energy. It was protecting her, and she cried, utterly bewildered at her conflicting emotions.

"How can you do this?!" Her father stood, staring at his burned hands,

Kagome shook her head desperately and sobbed, and she ran to him, her selfless, gentle heart crushed at the scent of his tears.

"My Kagome… how can you do this to your own father," He lamented. As Kagome reached out to him he reached back-

Only to slap her, so forcefully the girl stumbled to the ground. "You _whore!"_ He screamed, and he grabbed her hair again, yanking her up, "How dare you mix our purity with such vile, _disgusting_ blood!" He shook her roughly, "What will the Kamis do?! They'll punish us… "

"Papa," Kagome cried out, "Papa you're hurting me,"

"Shut up!" He hit her again, unable to contain his rage. And the girl fell on all fours, paralyzed in fear, unable to think in befuddlement.

Soft footfalls came running to them, wrapping the shellshocked girl in a warm embrace. It was Anna, her mother, and the little child Souta.

The Higurashi patriarch ranted like a madman, "Our lifespan…" he rasped, "Our enduring lifespan… will they take it away?!" He was not talking to Kagome now, but more to himself, delirious in his paranoia, "My youth… I'll grow old immediately like a mere _human_ ,"

"Kyoshiro," Anna whispered, sobbing under the rain, "My sweet, loving Kyoshiro…what has happened to you,"

And his malice drew back, seeing his family hunched before him. With shaking hands, he reeled. He will not allow the enemy to destroy his perfect life.

He did not know if the Kamis approved of such a disgusting union. He did not know if they will take away his lifespan. But the high priest did not want to take the risk.

He will have to undo this mistake himself.

Whatever it would take.

* * *

The Shrine Girl woke up the next morning, on her bed with tear-stained pillows and aching bones. She laid still for long moments, wishing that everything that happened last night was a horrible nightmare.

She stood up and stalked to the door. When she opened it she paused-

Her little brother was curled up with his miniature baseball bat in his arms, sound asleep protectively by her door.

She covered her mouth to stifle her sobs so early in the morning. Her other hand unconsciously reached to her neck, stroking her mating mark, seeking comfort in this tumultuous, confusing time. "Sesshomaru," she whispered, "Where are you…"

She tried to control her sorrow as she carried her little brother, gently placing him on her bed as he continued his blissful sleep. And she quietly walked out of the room, into the hallways.

And a nagging feeling rose inside her heart. It was deathly, eerily quiet… and she felt a painful lump in her throat.

She navigated through the ancient hallways, her footfalls creaking the tatami in search for a soul. The mansion was empty.

She stepped outside, feeling the warmth of the sun comfort her chilled, goosebump-laden skin. Something was off in the air, she could not pinpoint. Not even the birds sang, no summer breeze rustling the Japanese Maple and Sakura. In her discomfit, she would utter a silent prayer every minute.

Something was really amiss.

And it was then when she reached the Kagura-den did she feel it: that overwhelming power. It hit her like a ton of bricks, like a detonation to her face: the aura was so familiar that her soul ached.

The Shrine Girl's heart immediately raced, as she found herself running towards the small building. And when she reached the entrance she halted.

She had to step back, and her tears spilled when she realized what was happening. She sank on the floor, unable to contain the storm of emotions inside her.

The room was filled with silver energy: Sesshomaru's whole family- the Inuyoukai clan.

More than forty of them were kneeling in humble prostration on the tatami, Touga and Sesshomaru leading them, also on their knees, before the clearly bewildered and shocked Kyoshiro and Anna.

In front of them was an open box with a decorative comb and hair sticks.

Sesshomaru, backed by his entire clan,

was formally asking for her hand in marriage.


	16. Six Days

_**A/N:**_ I'm trying to get this story out and finish it as soon as I could. (I still have Ichi-go pending, and another one I'd like to start, but I can't unless I finish this.) Can't believe its almost a year.

This is still set in the past, and we will go all the way to the present.

I just want to remind you, mature situations in this chapter, and especially the next. Unfortunately, it isn't a lemon.

Standard disclaimer applies. Appreciate your reviews. Thanks, and have a nice weekend.

* * *

 _ **Six Days**_

* * *

 _ **-Day One-**_

"What are you so worried about?" He said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "We only have six days left. What else could happen in six days?"

Kagome cast her unseeing gaze down, and she gathered the material of her kimono on her hands. The Shrine Girl fell silent, her breath trembling. "Why won't you believe me," she whispered, "How could you not believe me."

 _I never thought being this close to what I've always prayed for,_

 _Could take me so far away from him._

Six Days. It seemed like a short moment in their extended lifespan, but for her, it would be the longest days of her life. Just yesterday was their Yuinou, and at that moment she never thought she could get any happier. But mentions of their wedding had brought a different level of elation. The Taisho clan would not settle for any less.

The wedding was set for six days. And she never expected it to be the source of her never-ending distress.

Ever since Sesshomaru had asked for her hand in marriage, her father held this curious smile in his face, one that she had never seen before. Gone was the direct, blunt affection for her that she had known and grew up with. He now regarded her almost all too kindly,

And it was disturbing.

Her father was a stranger.

He was planning something. And for the first time in a very long time, Kagome felt one emotion she had only felt when she had faced that blind youkai by the river, so long ago.

She _feared_.

The warm embrace of her lover relieved her from her trance. "Your father gave us his approval. The wedding is already set. Shrine Girl, I won't run away, if that's what you're scared about."

His attempts at humor were as pathetic as it had always been. And Kagome tried to smile. But her intuition was eating her alive… and she suddenly clung to him, her nails digging into his skin so hard it almost drew blood. "Something's not right," she told him, her voice begging, "Sesshomaru, I just feel it. Something is- "

"Ssshh…" he silenced her with a tender kiss.

Why was she so anxious? What was she so scared about? The Daiyoukai was slightly annoyed. Was she not thankful of the changes her father was trying to make regarding them? Gone was his malicious glare, the detesting aura… he was even speaking to him cordially. For the hundred-and-fifty years he had been in the Higurashi shrine, it was only at these times when he could finally conclude a truce.

And yet his Shrine Girl seemed to have taken the Patriarch's change out of context. She was never this mistrusting before.

"Sesshomaru," she suddenly whispered, "Make love to me."

He frowned at her forwardness. And she even took her own kimono off, her impatience surprising him. He held her wrist, he wanted her to slow down. "Shrine girl… you won't lose me. Not in six days."

She shook her head in frustration. Kagome reached out and slowly felt the outline of his face with her fingertips. And she kissed him, melting in his familiar warmth.

 _I know…_

 _But somehow, I feel…as if I am slowly losing myself…_

She did not wait. She pushed his thick girth into her womanhood, and she slumped on his shoulders, allowing herself to drown in the familiar wave of pleasure that was slowly gaining strength.

"Together Forever," she whispered, "In this lifetime, and the next… and in all others that will follow."

She wanted to shake away the debilitating fear. Kami, she wanted to trust Sesshomaru's assurances that everything will be all right. But she was not naïve to the world. She knew it only took one blink of an eye for everything to change.

She could not get this message through him: A lot could happen in six days.

* * *

 _ **-Day Two-**_

"You don't have to come, she is resting," Kyoshiro said through the phone, keeping his voice as low as possible, not wishing to wake his sleeping daughter.

"Higurashi-sama," Sesshomaru answered from the other line, "The business meeting is important, but if Kagome needs me then that meeting can easily be canceled,"

"Her fever has gone down since last night. She'll be fine, Sesshomaru. I've taken care of her for a hundred and forty-eight years." The Higurashi Patriarch turned towards his sick daughter on the futon. "Go to your meeting. I'm her father, I won't allow any harm on my precious Kagome."

"Hai," Sesshomaru said, "But tell her to call me as soon as she wakes up,"

"I will."

When Touga's heir left that night, it was then that his precious daughter started throwing up. There wasn't any contagious disease going on in the community, and if there was, Kagome would have enough resistance against common human illnesses.

But little changes had him wary. The past few days, she had been very picky about her food.

Kyoshiro stood from his position and stared down at her. Her visible blue energy… was slowly being entangled with a curious red sliver. Only high-level priests and priestesses could detect it, it was innate in their life-supporting energy. And Kyoshiro could see it spark, weakly, and it was growing stronger as the days passed by.

Like a little heartbeat, thriving.

His eyes narrowed.

"Papa, did Sesshomaru say he was coming?" Kagome's weak voice drifted through the room. It took a while for Kyoshiro to respond. The hard look on his face washed away, replacing it with a soft, concerned mask.

"No. He said he was busy… There were more important matters he had to attend to."

The Shrine Girl fell into silence. After long, hesitant moments, "Can I call him?"

"No. He told me not to have anyone disturb him today."

"Oh," Kagome sat up from her futon. She closed her eyes momentarily. "I'm so nauseous," she rested her face on the palms of her hands, "My stomach is not upset… but I just feel so queasy…" Kyoshiro watched, as she splayed her other hand instinctively on her abdomen, and she bit her lip. "Where is mama? I… want to talk to her."

"About what?"

Kagome shrunk under his sudden glare. "Something… just a suspicion," and her hands instinctively wrapped around her abdomen, almost as if protecting it.

Kyoshiro shifted. "Drink this," He said, handing her a cup of tea that he had prepared for her, _especially_ for her. "It will help with your nausea,"

"Papa," she said, "I don't like the smell…"

"Drink it." He demanded, and Kagome drew back at his sudden raised voice. Her hands braced slowly behind her, leaning away in alarm,

"Where is mama,"

"Kagome, drink it!" He suddenly said, half of the contents spilling on her lap, burning through her skin. The Shrine Girl gasped in pain and she tried to crawl away, but Kyoshiro snapped. He took the nearby teapot and grabbed Kagome by the hair, yanking her head up, hovering the teapot over her face.

"Open your mouth." He commanded.

Kagome shook her head, her tears spilling down her cheeks, down to the Tatami floor. She started sobbing, her despair washing over his aura like a strong current… pleading, begging. But he refused to waver. He clenched his hand on her jaw, forcing her mouth open, but Kagome remained defiant. He clamped on her muscle, and the girl's jaw finally gave in.

He poured the piping hot liquid into her throat.

She screamed.

Kyoshiro remained deaf to his daughter's tortured cries as it rang through the silent hallways. "Swallow it," he shook her jaw, "Swallow it!"

Reflex kicked in, and there was nothing else she could do. The thick, boiling liquid ran into her throat, and she was forced to drink the torture, searing her raw, burning her alive from the inside. And she felt as if she were drowning… drowning in fire.

 _Stop,_

She cried in her mind, her blue aura flaring in defense. But she tried to suppress it, how could she hurt her own father?

 _Papa, stop…_

 _Sesshomaru… where are you…_

 _please, help me…_

Poison. That was the only thing it would have been, for it to sting on her tongue so bad. The nasty aftertaste left her eyes watering. And she was not able to stop her disgust from violently forcing itself out.

The contents of her stomach regurgitated.

It back flowed like a surge. The acid and bile burned as it made her way up her already raw, injured throat, disgorging the barf out from her gut. But her father clasped his hand over her mouth and he forced her back on the floor, her digested hurl leaking out of her mouth, oozing out behind his cruel hand. "Don't spit it out, Kagome. Swallow it."

She heaved violently, trying to push him away. She was drowning in her own puke.

 _Someone…_

 _Please help me…_

She felt a weak pulse of energy run through her veins. Kagome gagged and choked, sobbing her bewildered, stunned heart out at the horrible realization- she was forced to take back her own vomit. Her blue aura cowered as she took painful swallows,

And her body wracked tremulous from the disgust…. the humiliation…

"I'm only doing this to protect you, my daughter," Kyoshiro said, stroking her hair lovingly, "To protect us… and our lineage…" The Shrine Girl's unseeing eyes widened when she suddenly felt that malicious aura flare in his hands again. It was coming straight towards her mating mark.

 _Sesshomaru!_

The weak pulse inside her flared, erupting into a bright, blinding red light. The blow was so strong that Kyoshiro was hurled several feet away, breaking the screen door, throwing him out of the hallway. And Kagome turned herself to the floor and retched,

Helplessly petrified,

Shaken to her core.

The strange red aura wrapped around her as if it was trying to console her, stroking her weary life energy, comforting her horrified soul. Kagome opened her eyes.

Outlines.

Extremely blurry outlines. She then realized, she was not imagining the outlines in her mind… she was seeing it. And she touched her eyes in disbelief. It was not enough to make images out of, it was extremely hazy. And there was a strange red tinge to her vision,

But she couldn't believe it.

She was starting to see.

 _How is this possible?_

"Kyoshiro!" Her mother screamed, and Kagome snapped her head towards the hallway. She could see the blurry outline of the shoji doors, her unfinished murals on the rice-paper walls,

"Onee-san!" A small figure came dashing towards her. She recognized the outline.

Souta.

She immediately succumbed, receiving his small body willingly in her arms.

"What happened?" the boy cried, and he reached out to touch her face. Kagome winced when his fingertips brushed her cheeks. "He hurt you," he said, "Kagome nee-san,"

She opened her mouth to speak.

And it dawned on her, her voice was gone. Her throat was burned and destroyed from the horrible encounter. She summoned her energy in attempts to heal herself. But there was something her father had infused with the liquid, and Kagome realized:

Her father was the High Priest of Higurashi Shrine.

His powers would easily exceed that of hers.

Her middle-schooler brother pulled away. "It's papa, isn't it," he whispered, "Nee-san… Sesshomaru-sama needs to know," he said, and he cupped her face gently, the child who was a mere six years old. And Kagome could only lament in despair at everything that was happening.

He was too young to be involved in this kind of mess,

He was too innocent to see this kind of abuse.

"Stay here, Nee-san," he said with determination, tears falling from his eyes, "He needs to know about this… he needs to take you away from here,"

And with that, he took off.

* * *

The young boy could barely comprehend, he was scared out of his wits. But one thing was clear in his mind. The horror in his sister's blue eyes compelled him to follow his instincts. He dashed past the slumped figure of his father on the hallway and rushed to the large receiving lobby. He shut the door behind him, and he lifted the receiver of the phone.

With shaking hands, he dialed a familiar number, and with one ring the other line answered. "Shrine Girl," the Daiyoukai's voice drifted through, "How does it feel like to sleep the whole day?"

"Sesshomaru-sama," The boy said, catching his breath. Sesshomaru paused, caught off guard by the unfamiliar voice.

"Souta?" Sesshomaru finally asked.

"Sesshomaru-sama, you need to come here immediately. Kagome nee-san is in trouble," his voice was unstable, he did not want to waste precious time, "He hurt her… he hurt her, Sesshomaru-sama… She's covered in bruises, Papa hurt her!"

"Souta, what are you talking about,"

"Sesshomaru-sama please—"

The Shoji Door slammed open, and Souta froze, numbed with fear. His father strode towards him and grabbed the receiver. "Sesshomaru," Kyoshiro said, his voice manifesting an eerie calm.

The boy tried to back away... but he couldn't.

Kyoshiro's hands were clamped firmly around Souta's throat.

"I don't know what kind of illness has befallen my daughter," Kyoshiro said, "But she woke up having these deliriums. She's manifesting these outrageous hallucinations," he clamped his hand tighter when Souta tried to resist, "Her high fevers are feeding her paranoia."

"Sesshomaru-sama, that's not-" Souta cried out, but his protests were in vain. He couldn't breathe, and his eyes were starting to roll to the back of his head.

"What?" Sesshomaru said from the other line, "I thought her fever broke,"

"Apparently not." Kyoshiro continued, "It came back, and she woke up screaming. I'm heartbroken…" he breathed deep, feigning exhaustion. "How could she think I would want to hurt her? I only want what's best for her."

"Higurashi-sama," Sesshomaru tried to stay calm, "Do you think it would be best if she stays with me until the wedding is-"

"No. Somehow her physical immunity is weakened. She wants to go with you. And she is stubborn, she will do anything to make that happen. But Sesshomaru, her condition will worsen if she stays surrounded with Youkai energy. It's best to keep her here, she's safer under our wing."

There was a long pause… and then,

"I understand, Higurashi-sama." The Daiyoukai answered.

Souta's eyes darkened in horror. Kyoshiro grinned. He released the boy, and Souta slumped on the floor, shaking in fear.

"But I'm coming tomorrow to visit her," Sesshomaru said, "Tell her I'm coming tomorrow."

"I will," Kyoshiro answered, bringing his glare to the wide-eyed, horror-struck child curled up on the floor,

"See you tomorrow."

* * *

 _ **-Day Three-**_

The Shrine Girl woke up with a startle. She sat up, drenched in her sweat. Her heart was beating so fast she had a hard time catching her breath… and she looked around, wishing it was all a horrible nightmare, brought in by her nervousness of the upcoming wedding.

But she saw the blurry outlines around her, that strange tinge of red.

Her heart sank.

"Kagome," a gentle voice called out to her, and she turned to the source. The blurry, yet familiar, image of her mother was beside her, and Kagome's heightened wariness crumbled.

"My dear Kagome," Anna whispered, "My precious daughter…"

Kagome pointed to her throat.

"I know," Anna cried, "Kagome, I know," and she offered her a glass of clear water. Kagome drew back for a minute, but she looked at the kind face of her mother… and she shrugged away her doubt.

Kagome never realized how thirsty she was until she drank the whole glass. Anna smiled in relief, "There, there, child," she held her daughter in her arms.

As the Shrine Girl tried to calm her frantic mind to no avail, the picture frame on her study caught her eyes… a blurred image of her and Sesshomaru in their Yuinou. And beside it was another obscure photo…

Of two children standing under a sakura tree.

Kagome squinted, and she held her breath in horror. She surmised the children in the picture was her and Sesshomaru, but she could not remember when the picture was taken. And the further she tried to recall, the more gaps there was in her memory.

She pulled back abruptly, her eyes wide in alarm.

"What is it," Anna stroke her hair, trying to calm her hysteric daughter, "My daughter, what is it?"

She pointed frantically behind her, and when her mother's gaze settled on the photo, a curious expression veiled Anna's eyes, like a curtain that fell over that soft, gentle gaze. Her mother cleared her throat, "Sesshomaru-chan? He's downstairs."

Kagome slowly pulled away and looked at her mother in confusion at her sudden hardened tone.

Then, a familiar voice drifted into the hallway. Her heart painfully ached and Kagome bolted up, tearing herself away from her mother and she dashed out of the room. As she ran through familiar, obscured hallways she could feel that little energy also pulse to life, trying to comfort her bruised soul, cocooning her in a warmth she wanted to withdraw into and never return.

She opened the shoji door to one of the rooms, and it was as if her entire being trembled. Familiar white hair, severe golden eyes. Sesshomaru's sheltering presence instantly overwhelmed her.

"My daughter, what a relief. You're finally awake."

Goosebumps rode on her skin, the moment she heard the intruding voice. Her eyes darted towards the person who was seated across her lover, and she stepped back in revulsion.

Her father, smiling worriedly at her.

Kyoshiro stood up. "Well I guess I need to give you both some privacy," he said as he walked towards the doorway. He stopped when he reached beside Kagome, and he dared to bend down and plant an affectionate kiss on the crown of her head. "Don't exhaust yourself."

He continued his way out. Kagome's eyes flew open, an inexplicable rage consuming her. She spun around and reached out to his receding form, but a hand caught her wrist, and she turned back.

It was Sesshomaru.

"Shrine Girl," he said, his cold, calculating eyes melting into that of immense worry, "Kagome." He pulled her into a tight embrace. "Kagome."

Kagome wanted to cast everything in abandon. She wanted to close her eyes and leave everything in his safe presence. But she had no time to waste. She writhed away from his arms and headed to a nearby drawer.

Sesshomaru only watched her silently as she went through the drawers like a madwoman. It was when she started crying was when he decided to step in-

"Shrine Girl,"

She halted and pulled out a box in the topmost shelf. There were blank calligraphy scrolls on her hand, and she walked past Sesshomaru and went straight to the large table. She spread the scrolls and opened the box. In it were her old brushes and an unused tub of ink.

"Kagome, what are you-"

To his amazement, she dipped a brush in the tub and started writing.

"Kagome," a smile dare crept into his features, "You can see…"

Her hands were shaking, and the output came out so crooked it looked like a work of a child who had just learned to write… far from the elegant calligraphy that she had executed so long ago. But Sesshomaru frowned when he noticed big drops of her tears start to fall on the paper, blotting the ink uglier than before.

Frustrated, she shoved the paper closer to him, forcing him to read.

 _-Everything is an intense blur, but I am starting to see. Sesshomaru, take me out of here,-_

"Kagome, you're sick," he said gently, and the Shrine Girl shook her head with such anger, her bitter tears never ceasing. Her hands drifted yet again to the paper,

 _\- Look at me, look at what he's done! I'm hurting all over, Just look at me!-_

Her handwriting grew more crooked by the minute, as she was blinded further by her frustration and tears. Sesshomaru reached out for her wrists and tried to steady her, she was so close to hysteria,

"Kagome, Kyoshiro-sama was probably right. I shouldn't expose you further to my Youkai energy for now, it's stressing you more-"

She flung his hands away from her _._

 _-Why… why won't you believe me,-_ she wrote madly.

Kagome shoved him forcibly away, and she hurled the brush on the floor in anger. It splattered black ink everywhere. She backed away from him. She pointed at her throat, and to the bruises on her face. The burn on her mouth and lips,

And her eyes widened when she saw Sesshomaru's soft look grow cold.

"Your father told me all about it. Kagome, I think I should leave before you harm yourself any further again."

Her vision flickered even more. Her Sesshomaru, her love, the person she trusted the most, was slowly backing away from her…

"You need rest. I don't want you to be acting all erratic in the wedding," he said, and she stared at him in disbelief, "Kagome. Please restrain yourself… don't involve Souta in this again."

If she could have screamed, she already had. With blinding rage, she rushed to Sesshomaru and flailed her fists against him in total refusal, at an utter loss in her realization.

Sesshomaru thought she was harming herself. That she had gone delirious and bruised herself, burned herself, so that her "fake" story would be believable, and they would blame her father.

And she had "connived" with her kid brother, conned him into her twisted plot just to get her out of the mansion.

"You're really sick, Kagome," Sesshomaru braced his hands on her arms and crushed her in his embrace, "And I'm worried, you need to heal. We have three more days, that would be enough time. By then the illness would have gone… that was what Kyoshiro-sama said, "

His own tears had streaked down his face… Kagome realized that he was truly worried for her well-being, that he genuinely believed he was helping her.

But unfortunately, what he believed in was a lie. It was then that her strength left her, and she fell into a helpless crying spell, slumping into his arms, her knees giving way.

"I need to go before this gets worse," he whispered, and the poor, mute girl's hands fell limp as he pulled way.

Unable to hold him back, unable to call out his name, she watched helplessly as his blurry image disappeared from her red-tinged vision.

And she was left all alone in the empty room, with scattered paper and spilled ink all around, and she cried out a silent lament… voiceless… powerless.

She reached out weakly for the brush on the floor and absently scribbled on a crumpled scroll,

 _-Of all the people, I couldn't believe it had to be you…-_

 _-How could you not believe me,-_

 _-Sesshomaru, how could you not believe me…-_

All hope extinguished, spiraling down into a void of despair, she slumped on the wooden floor and cried her heart out.

The strange, weak pulse in her veins- which remained quiet throughout the whole encounter- slowly ebbed out from hiding, gradually wrapping her in its comforting warmth, cocooning her in a quiet assurance, lulling her into a silent sanctuary.

She closed her eyes, allowing herself to be sheltered in its unusual embrace.

* * *

 _ **-Day Four-**_

She was growing weaker, and it was getting harder to even lift her limbs. Still, she fought against the invisible binding energy. She tried to stay away from her father as best as she could. Her mother, bless her gentle heart, brought her dinner to her room last night.

She ate heartily in silence, refusing to be defeated by this fucked-up mess. She needed her strength… for what she had no idea. But she was bound to find a way out of this hellhole.

Kagome turned the TV on. A weather report, still very blurry in her eyes, but she could make out the moving images of clouds and raindrops. Paired with the meteorologist's modulated voice, it was supposed to rain hard, starting today, and in the next two days.

She secretly hoped it would not rain on her wedding day.

Kagome bolted up and rushed to her cordless phone and picked up her receiver. Dead silence… Her father had cut their home service, probably yesterday evening.

A scuffle from outside caught her attention. Kagome slowly inched towards the window and peeked outside.

The morning was overcast. Dark, heavy rainclouds had already started to form on the sky. She momentarily closed her eyes, secretly thankful that she was able to see, albeit like a newborn, but still able to see in fuzzy detail the sky that she loved so much. Her gaze drifted down. Two figures were making their way down the thousand steps, she could not recognize who it was because they were under a large umbrella.

A loud banging suddenly jolted her to her senses. Kagome froze, fear starting to creep up into her spine. The loud banging continued… and Kagome would have stayed there, paralyzed in fear, when the door rattled.

"Kagome nee-san… it's me."

Souta's voice called out in urgency. The Shrine Girl's weakened limbs snapped to attention, and she rushed straight to the door and tried to open it.

To her disbelief, she was locked from the outside.

She started to panic.

"Nee-san," Souta said, sensing her distress. She could hear metal clinking with each other, "Nee-san don't worry… I have the keys, I stole it from him while he was getting ready this morning,"

The doorknob clicked, and it opened.

Kagome exhaled in relief. Souta's small form stood by the doorway, he had something in his hands, but she did not bother to find out what it was. She strode towards the boy to engulf him in a tight hug, but he quickly brushed past her. "Quick, there's no time to lose," he said, and he flung the object in his hands to the floor, and it shattered into pieces.

He knelt before it, quickly gathering whatever was inside.

It was his piggy bank, with change and a few bills. His life savings.

Kagome reached out and touched a hand on his shoulder, and his eyes snapped towards her.

"He's out to Shibuya to convince Kikyo nee-chan into sharing them her memories," he said, and Kagome shook her head, confused.

He looked back at her with heightened alarm. "Nee-san, did you eat what mama had been giving you since yesterday? You shouldn't have… it contains heavy binding spells and an ancient memory spell…"

Kagome drew back, her brows meeting in confusion. Her eyes then drifted to the pictures scattered on her wall, and it was as if she was crushed between two falling worlds.

The pictures, she could now barely remember them.

"I eavesdropped last night… He's planning to extract you from your mating mark."

Kagome gasped, a silent cry of despair. She covered her mouth as moans started to escape her throat,

 _He can't do that. How can he even do that? How is that even possible?!_

Souta continued his distracted counting of the change, "He's gonna do a grand exorcism, and he couldn't just do it like he would an ordinary human. You have a hundred and more years of collected memories…

He needs to push those memories down first to decrease the resistance of the exorcism against your soul. And to fill the gaping holes, he said he was going to inject new memories,"

She thought she couldn't cry anymore. But the tears flowed unchecked yet again. He was going to 'extract' the demonic energy from her soul.

And she remained paralyzed in horror-

The energy that he so much hated… did he realize it was bonded to her? That it was already a _part_ of her?

He was literally going to _tear her soul in half_.

Her body trembled, and her mind frantically raced. At loss of what she was to do, with no one to turn to. That little warm energy had been pulsing gently through her veins, weakly extending its comfort to her, but she barely noticed.

She started to spiral into despair.

Souta shoved the meager cash in front of her. With tears in his eyes he took Kagome's hands and forced her to take it, "Kagome nee-san, there is a train station at the corner of the road. Take a train, and when you reach the second stop, take a cab to this address. Remember, the _second_ stop. It's in Hokkaido. I copied the address from Mama's phone book. It's Sesshomaru-sama's house, I wrote it big so you can see,"

Kagome stared at her brother in disbelief. This was her six-year-old brother. Her six-year-old brother! "I've been with Papa once to visit the Taishos. This should be enough money to get you there,"

The Shrine Girl stared dumbly at the change on her hands,

"I tried calling Kikyo-nee-chan, but all the lines are cut off. Kagome nee-san, go." He reached out and pushed her, "Go," he cried out angrily,

"GO!"

The rain started to pour outside, and Kagome fiercely embraced her brother. Both in tears, both trembling in fear of what was before them, they tried to draw courage form the impossible.

"I'll be praying for you," Souta cried, the Shrine Girl wiping his tears off his small cheeks, "Kagome Nee-san. You'll make it, I'll be praying hard for you."

She nodded, and with one final look of determination, she pulled away from him and headed to the main hall.

The rain was pouring. Her vision was still extremely blurry, but it had improved to a point where she could now recognize Souta's large scribble. She had never been out of the shrine grounds before. She had no idea what the outside world looked like.

Kagome closed her eyes, taking comfort in that warm, little pulse in her energy, as it also seemingly tried to reach out to her, holding her hand, telling her she was not alone.

Taking a broken umbrella and holding a pocketful of change, Kagome stepped outside the familiarity of her home,

and into a modern world she barely knew.

* * *

The rain was cruel. But the boy was at the open Prayer Hall, soaking wet from the downpour, refusing to be deterred from his mission. With eyes shut tight and hands clasped so strongly together, he whispered, again and again:

"Please, keep her safe. Please keep Kagome nee-san safe."


	17. Six Days (part 2)

_**Six Days (part 2)**_

* * *

 _Out of the second stop on Hokkaido,_

 _Take a cab straight to him…_

 _Please… watch over me, please… keep me safe._

The Shrine Girl clenched her fists beneath her flowing sleeves, steeling herself from any emotion that would dare escape her face. It was bad enough that she stood out in the train like an eyesore; in full Miko robes in the middle of casually-dressed people, but it was little strain compared to the real problem:

The cacophony of energy around her.

Mashed up tightly together, weak and strong, malicious and pure… the storm of different life energies left her reeling in confusion. Back in the shrine, whenever there were big events that involved many people, her father would set up a powerful neutralizer that would regulate the flow of the mass of energies; to prevent them from clashing, to not disturb the Shikon Jewel that was rumored to be buried underneath the grounds.

The binding spells were taking effect. Her limbs were so heavy she felt as if she were walking underwater, hobbling with manacles clamped on her feet. Every movement was now an immense task, and it took a taxing expanse of energy.

And the memories of her white Inu were flickering… his rare smile, his golden eyes…slowly fading into the darkness of her mind, like a dying candle into the quiet of the night.

 _Sesshomaru…_

Kagome closed her eyes, trying to find comfort in something, trying to take hold of anything. And she found it, it was that little pulse in her energy. She focused her racing mind to the strange little warmth. It leaned on to her, and she leaned on to it… so comforting it was that she was almost lulled into sleep, almost missed the overhead announcement for her stop.

The Shrine Girl brought herself back to the confusing world, and she hurriedly rushed to the exit. And when she stepped outside on the platform, she was stunned.

The whole train ride took about four hours, and she arrived in the other end in early noon. She expected the sun to be high, but she looked up to a gloomy sky, it reminded her of the weather forecast earlier. The rain clouds were so heavy it had turned the day into a dark, foreboding world. The torrent drummed hard on the roof of the station. She looked around…so many lights, so many people. It wouldn't have been a problem if she could have seen clearly. But everything was still such a blur, and the lights, moving and blinking made her nauseous, the people were bumping into her left and right. Kagome heard several curses of annoyance directed her way, "Watch where you're going!" "Are you blind?" "Country bitch."

A stranger crashed into her, and before she knew it, her umbrella was out of her grasp. The figure then darted away, snatching the umbrella from her hands.

She could feel the rain soak her hair.

Kagome ran to the nearest shelter. Her attention then snapped to her empty hand- her purse was missing, the one which contained what was left of her brother's meager cash.

Her heart raced in panic, her breath in controlled gasps. Kagome's eyes started to burn from her restrained tears, but she forced herself not to cry. She tried to painfully suppress the fear that was threatening to consume her. She was extremely vulnerable now, she will not dare expose that vulnerability further.

She bit her tongue and tried to control herself… her courage was slowly crumbling.

 _Please… keep me safe._

The Shrine Girl reached out for her mating mark and tried to recall all the memories of him... slowly slipping out of her grasp.

"Lost, Ojou-san?" A stranger said, and she turned beside her to see a group of middle-aged men grinning at her. "Looks like you need some rest. I know of a perfect place for you to get cozy," the man's leer widened, and Kagome turned to run, but he caught her wrist and pulled her towards him. Three other men cornered her to a trap.

"Where are you from?" another one asked. Kagome shook her head and tried to pull away, tried to summon her offensive energy.

But the binding spell had already started to block her channels. She was left powerless.

"She's cute." The other one cut in,

"We're gonna have fun tonight," the third man said and brushed his fingers on her breasts. Kagome opened her mouth to scream.

But she had no voice.

The man snickered, "Oh, I think she secretly likes it," he said, and looked warily around, checking for any curious gazes. When it was apparent that no one else was looking, he slipped his hand between her thighs.

 _Sesshomaru!_

Kagome collected what was left of her strength- she gathered her knee and struck the man on his balls. The pervert immediately lurched in pain. The Shrine Girl bent down and forced her body up, delivering a headbutt that knocked the man holding her unconscious. Scared out of her wits, forcing the tears back from her eyes, she tried to run away. But the two remaining men restrained her. "Feisty one we have here," said one,

"We have the perfect punishment for you later," the other one sneered.

 _Where are you…_

 _Sesshomaru please… why aren't you by my side…_

Kagome wanted to fight back, but the binding spell was getting heavier by the minute. It weighed her already lethargic limbs down, her consciousness was flickering. The resolve she tried to build up on her way had crumbled, and she started sobbing like a little child.

There was nothing else she could do.

 _Someone help me…_

The men started pulling her away. Concerned bystanders looked helplessly, and Kagome met their eyes, pleading for help. But they only watched, refusing to be involved.

 _Someone… please._

Then, a policeman's whistle rang through the station.

From her blurry vision she could distinguish a uniformed officer running towards them, and he stopped in front of the tensed men. "What's this?"

"She's my daughter," the man answered nervously, "Rebellious little thing. Ran away from home to be with her boyfriend,"

The officer peered at him with suspicion. His gaze then drifted to Kagome. "Young lady?"

Kagome's strength was draining rapidly. But she managed to shake her head in negation, and with flaccid hands she took out the piece of paper where Souta had written the address. The policeman quietly scanned it, and he turned it over, carefully studying the other side. It turned out that it was not a mere piece of paper.

Souta had written the address on the back of a picture: the one where Kagome was proudly holding up an obi to the camera, and Sesshomaru sitting beside her, smiling. They had traditional gifts on the table before them:

It was a picture of the two in their extravagant Yuinou.

The policeman's eyes narrowed. "This is the Taisho heir." He glared at the two men. "Unhand her. You have no idea who you're crossing hairs with."

* * *

"My son was involved in a frame-up. He's hanyou… and a new officer. There is much prejudice against him in the task force." the officer solemnly shared, as he flicked his gaze to the woman sitting quietly at the back seat of his police car. Her hands were tense on her knees, her gaze frozen down. He brought his attention back to the road as he drove. "Taisho-sama cleared his name. There is much I must be thankful for. The peace treaty that they developed brought such a big change." He stopped the car when he reached a large gated entrance, and he showed his badge to the guard.

The gates lifted, and they proceeded inside. They were engulfed in a lull of silence.

The police officer pulled over. "I surmise that was a Yuinou in the picture." He turned to her. "Ojou-san, may the Kamis bless you and Sesshomaru-sama."

The radio crackled, and a tinny voice drifted through the receiver: "Dispatch needed in Kenbuchi. Possible child abduction. Anyone near the area, please report."

The policeman lifted his radio. "Unit 9 here. I'm on my way."

The wipers swished back and forth, not really clearing the heavy downpour that ran down the windshield. "This is the Taisho residence," he said, and the girl finally looked up. The policeman was slightly surprised when she looked back at him with such gratitude, and he bowed his head in apology. "I don't have an umbrella, I lent my last raincoat to an old woman,"

The girl clad in Miko robes shook her head and bowed down in gratefulness.

The tinny voice from the radio interrupted again, "Unit 9. Your location,"

"I'm on my way," he repeated. With one last thankful bow, Kagome dragged her already numb body out of the car, and once again, into the rain.

The police car sped off. And she found herself alone once again. But she gathered all that was left of her strength and took a step towards the closed gates.

Her knees wobbled and gave way.

She fell face first on the concrete ground.

 _Fading… my strength is fading…_

The rain pound on her pathetic form. And there was an overwhelming torrent in her mind. Kagome crawled towards the gate, refusing to be crushed under the crippling pressure in her soul.

 _Your smile… is fading…_

She reached out for the doorbell. In her mind, she was reaching out to him, to the image of the man with white hair and golden eyes, as it was being obscured by a thick curtain of haze she could not seem to get out of.

Her limbs could not carry her any longer. Her hand dropped, and she fell limp on the floor. Distant memories hovered before her like a mirage, of Sakura blossoms and water lilies, of unfinished murals and quiet moments of her alone, praying with a smile in the quiet of the oratory hall…

And of him and her, laying on the grass, watching the clouds drift by on an endless blue sky.

 _I want to call out to you…_

 _But I realize… I can't remember your name._

The curious little energy was also affected by the bind, but it fluttered in her channels, making its presence known. And so Kagome held on to it, the only shelter she had in this confusing world.

 _Maybe I should rest,_

The little energy fluttered faster in protest, trying to keep her awake. But Kagome started to close her heavy eyes,

 _Just a little rest…_

Something shifted before her, and she brought her weary gaze to it. The gate was opening, and a figure rushed to her slumped form. "Ojou-san," it said, trying to rouse her from severe lethargy. He noticed the picture crumpled in her hands and he took it, and when he laid eyes on the photo, he immediately pulled away and pressed the intercom. "Sesshomaru-sama, it's me, Jaken," he hastily said, "Come up to the gate, hurry! The Lady Higurashi… somehow she's here-"

Jaken did not even get the chance to finish what he was saying. Kagome felt the old man's presence being forcefully shoved away, as it was replaced by a very familiar warmth.

"Kagome," the warm voice said, and she brought her weakened vision towards the newcomer. She could see a blur of white hair and blazing golden eyes. And her heart ached, remembering oh so distorted memories that now seemed like a distant dream.

 _I know you… my soul still recognizes you,_

The Shrine Girl felt a gentle tickle on her skin. He was licking her as if in comfort, concentrating on a certain spot at the side of her neck. Her self-awareness was barely awakened from the heavy spell she was under, but she was able to surmise:

 _A mating mark?_

 _At some point in time…was I mated to you?_

The tears that she so desperately held since she stepped in this strange place broke from its restraint, and she finally allowed herself to cry as she melted into the familiar stranger's arms.

* * *

"How is she?" his father asked, and Sesshomaru looked up at him, exhausted.

"Her energy is dwindling." Sesshomaru said as he closed the door behind him. "She is asleep… she has been asleep since she arrived." Sesshomaru held the crumpled picture of them in his hands. "Father, I don't know anymore… I'm starting to doubt myself,"

"Maybe we should delay the marriage until she gets well, "

"No." Sesshomaru snapped, and after long moments, he realized the tone he threw against his father. He cast his head down in embarrassment. "No," he said softly.

"Son, is there something you want to tell me?"

"She has been telling me… that something is wrong. But Kyoshiro-sama is saying she is sick, that she just needs rest."

"Who do you believe in?" Touga asked quietly, and the young Daiyoukai was lulled into a deep silence. "Son, who do you believe?"

"I want to believe in her," Sesshomaru finally answered, "But it also sounds so senseless. She's been rambling, delirious… and the last time I saw her, she almost seemed… she almost seemed…" he trailed off, unable to utter the word.

Touga set a hand on his shoulder, "Whatever your decision is, do what you think is best for you and your mate."

Sesshomaru quietly nodded his head.

* * *

 _ **-Day Five-**_

Anna's worried voice drifted to the other end, "My Kagome," she cried, "My dear daughter. Thank Kami she's okay,"

Sesshomaru listened solemnly on the other line, torn between keeping his woman or sending her back. He had the foreboding feeling, and he tried to shrug it away. But it kept on nagging him as he watched the Shrine Girl on his bed sleeping peacefully.

"Her energy might be dwindling too fast there. Sesshomaru-chan, if you don't bring her here immediately, it might be too late."

"Higurashi-sama," he said, his voice barely audible, "Is he hurting her?"

The other line fell into a long silence.

"Is Kyoshiro-sama hurting her," he paused, "Please tell me. I can protect her. Keep her away, as what she had begged me. I need to know… I'm so confused. I don't know what to do anymore,"

"Sesshomaru-chan," she finally answered, and Sesshomaru held his breath. "No one is hurting her here. We only want what's best for her. And I'm sure you do too."

The Daiyoukai let out a deep exhale. "I'll take her back to the shrine tonight."

"Thank you."

He hung the phone up.

In the Higurashi Shrine, Anna dropped her cell phone on the ground, setting her palms on her face and cried. "I'm sorry, Sesshomaru-chan," she whispered, "Kagome, I'm sorry."

She clutched her chest, the painful bruises from Kyoshiro's beatings starting to ache in strain.

* * *

The Shrine Girl opened her eyes, and somehow, she felt as if it were hard to breathe. A familiar ceiling, cedar walls, the moon peeking through the Japanese maple and Sakura outside the window.

She was back in her room.

 _I'm not supposed to be here._

She tried to move her limbs, but she was immobile.

 _Please… whoever is listening…_

 _Whoever is there… keep me safe…_

"You slept again for the whole day," a voice drifted beside her, and she turned her weary eyes to the source. In her blurry, red-tinged vision, there was a man with white hair and the most familiar golden eyes.

She did not know him. She did not remember him. But her heart ached, it was a pain that was so overwhelming it immediately brought tears to her eyes.

And he saw it, and his lips curled downwards in restraint. She watched him as he silently cried with her. He reached out and took her flaccid hands, running it on the outline of his face, her palms wet from his streaking tears.

He kissed her hands, bent down and whispered softly, "Kagome. It's a big day for us tomorrow," He forced a pained smile, "Hang in there… we'll see each other tomorrow…" he rambled as he kissed her lips, and he gently rested his forehead on hers. "I have to go."

Those four words stabbed her in her soul like no other pain. She wanted to reach out to him, he started to pull away. Hazy memories of him and her flooded its way into her exhausted mind,

 _Don't leave me…_

 _Please don't leave me…_

She opened her mouth to call out to him.

But she did not have a voice.

And as she watched his receding form, deep inside she felt so betrayed.

 _White Inu…_

 _Why can't you hear my soul_

 _Calling out to you?_

* * *

When the Daiyoukai reached the doorway he heard a slump. He turned around, and his eyes widened.

The Shrine Girl was on the floor, her body trembling from her voiceless sobs.

And he wanted to go back. Gather her in his arms, whisper words of comfort, but he knew his presence was making things worse. She managed to lift her blue eyes towards him.

 _I'm sorry. But I have to do this._

He turned to the door. But an unusual sound caught his attention, and he searched in the dim of the moonlight until he realized-

She was scratching the wooden floor with her nails. And she was scratching so hard and desperate her fingers started to bleed, but it did not stop her from what she was doing.

Sesshomaru shook his head in disbelief, and he rushed to her and wrapped her in a desperate embrace. "Kagome. Please… We'll see each other tomorrow," he could feel the puffs of her warm breath, unsteady and shaking. He pulled away and kissed her bloody fingers,

He gathered her in his arms and lifted her back to the bed.

With one last kiss to her lips, he backed away.

Then her fingers twitched. It caught his attention. Kagome's weary eyes drifted to the floor, and his gaze followed.

He stepped back.

On the floor, etched by her nails was a bloody message for him:

 _ **-Don't walk away like this.**_

 _ **Please, take me with you.-**_

She was crying, her blue eyes pleading. And Sesshomaru clenched his fists in restraint.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he whispered,

And he turned away and closed the door.

* * *

"Kagome, daughter. Open your eyes."

Her father's voice roused her to consciousness, goosebumps riding her flesh. The room spun around her, she tried to shake off the sinking feeling.

Although she had gaping holes in memory, there was one thing that was still clear in her mind.

Her father's abuse.

The little red pulse in her energy was weakened. She tried to cradle it in her soul. And her red-tinged vision was flickering. She looked around her-

Unfinished murals on the shoji walls, of realistic Sakura trees, and a White Inu beside a young girl, staring at the infinite blue sky. She was in the roofed Haiden, on her knees, too weak to move. And he was standing before her, the stranger she called her father.

She hung her head and cried, holding on to her last memory of the white-haired man with golden eyes: of his receding form in the doorway, silhouetted in the dark, as he walked away from her yearning, lonely soul.

"I'm sorry, daughter… for blaming you two nights ago."

Kagome shook her head, reaching out for the comforting little pulse inside her, unable to trust anything except for that red energy that stayed constantly beside her in her moments of turmoil.

"When that last bout of red energy flared against me, I realized it was not you. You weren't trying to hurt me," he reached out and cupped her cheek, and Kagome roughly looked away. "My daughter, my poor little daughter." He said, and Kagome watched in horror, as he took out a wooden paddle from the side.

And he lifted his arms and struck.

He hit her stomach. She lurched in pain, blood spilling out of her mouth. Immediately her meager vision flickered, and the little pulse in her energy ached. It was too weak now to fight back, she was too injured to protect it.

"My poor daughter, plagued by two _demons_."

Kagome's eyes flew wide open, as she started to realize. And her tears spilled, unable to believe…

His father's cruel hand struck again, and she curled sideways on the floor, wrapping her hands protectively around her womb.

 _No…_

 _Please no…_

Unable to fight back she let out silent screams of torture, each blow fading her red-tinged vision, each clout breaking her soul.

The little red pulse was fading, slowly, slowly slipping from her hold.

 _I can't…_

She gasped in desperation, as she tried to crawl away. But she was paralyzed, her body was bruised and stunned.

And with one hopeless sob, he graced her with a final blow. Her womb spasmed wildly, and blood spilled from her womanhood, down to her legs, dripping in abnormal amounts on the wooden floor.

The Shrine Girl shook her head, wishing in her battered mind this was all a nightmare.

That energy that flared in her protection, that same current that lent her temporary, red-tinged sight, the little red pulse that held her hand through her times of distress,

It did not belong to the White-haired Inu.

 _It was of their unborn child._

With one last comforting flutter, the little red energy finally disappeared.

Kagome broke down on the floor, and she cried her heart out. Unable to fight, her will already crushed into pieces. Now unable to see, back into the dark void of blindness, she felt her father's hand touch her forehead.

A torrent of unknown memories surged into her mind. Images of an unfamiliar Shrine, stranger's faces, a small grocery store, a little school…

Her body shook violently, unable to take the huge amount of memories in such a rapid time.

"Stay away from her!" She heard her little brother scream, and she heard a short struggle ensue. Then the unmistakable sound of a small body crashing through the shoji doors resounded, and her little brother's screams were no more.

Her father's malicious energy flared, and finally, it went straight down to her neck.

Kagome convulsed.

"Kyoshiro," her mother's voice pleaded, as the cruel hand was being pulled away, "Stop it, you're killing her! Kagome, Kagome!"

Another blow bounced on the silent walls, of fists crushing on bone. And the hand with the malicious energy attacked once again.

The pain was incomparable, and she screamed in her mind. Her soul was being pulled apart. She could feel it _tearing_ her insides,

 _No more…_

 _Please, no more._

She couldn't scream, she couldn't even curl to herself from the immense torture. And she reached out to the little red energy, but it didn't reach back. She was bleeding out, physically, spiritually… everything was painful,

Dizzying, painful…

She could not endure any more.

Her own spirit was fading.

 _I'm sorry…_

To whom she was apologizing to, she did not know. And life was slowly flickering out of her soul…

 _I'm sorry._

 _I did all that I can to hold on._

The Shrine Girl closed her unseeing blue eyes, and she took in her last breath.

* * *

 _ **-Day Six-**_

" _Sesshomaru," she said, and he opened his eyes._

" _Kagome, what are you doing here?" She was seated beside him, at the edge of the bed. He shot up from his position and wrapped her in his arms. "Are you all healed?" he pulled away, cupping her delicate cheeks, planting soft little kisses on her face._

 _She smiled at him, "I came to tell you I'm okay now. And I'm sorry if at one point I got angry with you. But I understand now, you were only trying to protect me. Please, don't blame yourself."_

" _Kagome, today is-"_

 _She pulled away turned towards the window, the moonlight hitting her form, and she watched the receding stars in the twilight sky. "It's been so long."_

 _Sesshomaru smiled. "This all feels like a dream."_

" _Sesshomaru," she suddenly said, "I love you."_

 _He chuckled, but then she turned to him. And his breath hitched, he had never seen such sadness in her eyes before._

" _Please listen, because I want you to know this, because I need you to always remember. I love you, Sesshomaru."_

 _The Inu's lips parted, "Kagome…"_

" _I'm going somewhere." She said softly._

" _It's dawn." Sesshomaru held her hand, "I'll go with you,"_

" _Silly Sesshomaru," she smiled, and she reached out and touched his cheek, "You can't."_

" _Why not?"_

 _Kagome leaned forward and ghosted her lips against his. "Because where I'm going to, is not under this sky."_

 _And she gave him a sweet, gentle kiss._

"Kagome-" He woke up with a startle. Sesshomaru touched his lips and sat still for long moments, trying to comprehend the unusual dream. It all seemed so real.

A loud knocking drifted on his door, and it opened without even waiting for his permission. His father was on the doorway.

"Did you answer your phone?" he said, and Sesshomaru drew back at the alarm in his voice. A cold surge passed through Sesshomaru's spine, "Son, did you answer your phone?"

With numb hands, he checked his smartphone. There were ten missed calls from the Higurashi Patriarch.

"What's this all about?" he managed to say, and dread started creeping into his veins.

"Kyoshiro was trying to call you." Touga said,

"Kagome…She passed away last night…

from a miscarriage."

It was then that the world started fading around him.

And the White Inu forgot to breathe.

" _Where I'm going to… is not under this sky."_


	18. To See Her Once Again

_**A/N:**_ Sorry this took so long. We're nearing the end. A few chapters left and we'll conclude.

For a refresher, we now jump to the timeline in chapters _The Empty Shell_ and _The One Left Behind_.

 _Italicized_ are Sesshomaru's thoughts.

 _ **Italicized Bold**_ is the video playing.

Thanks for sticking around.

* * *

 _ **To See Her Once Again**_

* * *

 _-First year-_

 _They say that time heals all wounds…._

 _How long has it been?_

 _I don't know anymore, I lost track of time._

The Inuyoukai curled himself on the floor, the images of the TV flickering in the dark of his room. An empty DVD case with the label _**Yuinou**_ sat neglected before him. His eyes, once full of golden life was glazed over.

The trail of tears on his cheeks had never really dried…

And he lay there,

empty and exhausted, but the tears would not stop.

And he knew they wouldn't, he had been here before.

Many times before.

 _ **The camera's view shifted to another package, blurring as the focus was brought back to Kagome. "This one's called Tomo... tomo... shiraya?" Kagome asked, and Sesshomaru's voice drifted into the video.**_

" _ **Shiraga," he corrected, and Kagome nodded.**_

 _All I know is that I miss her,_

 _Every day the world goes on, and people tell me things will get better…_

" _ **Tomoshiraga," she continued, "Tomo means together, Shiraga means White Hair." She tightened her hold on Sesshomaru's hand, and she smiled softly. "so that Sesshomaru-sama and I can live together until we grow old..."**_

 _Nothing is happening._

 _Nothing is changing._

 _I…still miss her…_

 _ **"No, he's quite the shy one. As you've noticed he never puts up any verbal or physical display when other people are around. But he doesn't need to... I know he loves me, and I trust him."**_

 _ **Kagome ran her hand tenderly through his hair, careful not to wake him.**_

He closed his eyes, imagining her hands running tenderly through his hair, reliving the moment, the sensation, the feeling of her touch. And his jaw tightened in restraint,

Frustrated, heartbroken.

 _You said you'd always be there when I needed you._

 _You said you'll be waiting at the corners until I call._

 _You said, that even if we're far apart, you'll do everything in your strength just to be with me._

He curled to himself in fetal position and he cried his heart out. Wishing his tears would reach her, to wherever distant sky she was under,

wishing she would hear.

 _Where are you?_

 _Where are you…_

 _Kagome… where are you. You promised me… you promised me…_

The daiyoukai reached out, touching the screen, tracing his fingers on the outline of her face. And his hands tingled, yearning for the sensation of her skin, soft… and warm…

" _ **Ehhh, but still, wouldn't it be nice for him to display a little bit of affection?"**_

" _ **Yes, I admit, it would be nice for him to do so..." Kagome said,**_ **"** _ **And I will be waiting, Kikyo, until the time comes when he won't be embarrassed to hold my hand, won't be too shy to say those three words to me out loud."**_

Sesshomaru broke down and sobbed like a child. A lost child, with only the laughter of his best friend, his mate, which was now as distant as a dream, as the only anchor in this now confusing world.

 _I'll do anything, I won't hold back on my affections,_

 _I promise to hold your hand, even with other people around… I'll hold it tight until my hands bleed and I'll fucking never let go…_

 _And I'll tell you I love you, I promise to tell you I love you…every waking hour of your life, in every chance that I can get,_

 ** _"And I'll never be ashamed to tell this to him again and again_**

 ** _Because I want him to know this, because he needs to always remember."_**

"Kagome," he whispered, drowning in despair, "I'll do all that and more…

I'll do anything…"

 _ **She leaned down and brushed his bangs away from his forehead, and she planted a soft kiss on his cheek.**_

" _ **I love you, Sesshomaru." she whispered, "I love you." And the video finally faded into black.**_

 _I'll do anything…_

 _I just want to hold you again,_

 _I just want to see you again._

* * *

He stared at the running water in the bathroom sink, his vision flickering before him. Empty bottles lay scattered on the floor, the tips of his fingers were losing sensation. His lips were starting to feel numb.

The sting of the poison he drank burned in his tongue.

Sesshomaru swayed, and he allowed himself to feel the rush of the deadly liquid burn through his veins. As the room spun around him, he had to brace his hands on the sink as he heaved.

Blood from his damaged gut rushed into his throat, out of his mouth. He threw up a violent spatter of bright red, and he watched in detachment as it spiraled down the drain, along with the rushing water from the school's bathroom faucet.

 _I want to see you again…_

He did not get the chance to say goodbye to her. Even at her funeral, and he could barely remember when it was because everything else in his life since her death was like a cloudy, fucked-up blur, the Higurashi Patriarch forced him out of the Shrine.

It was a closed casket service.

Why would he hold a closed-casket service?

Memories of his Shrine Girl, crying, begging him to take her with him flooded his mind…

And at that moment the only thing he wanted to do was to open the casket. There was a violent confrontation between him and the patriarch, and the Daiyoukai's father had to drag him out of the Shrine, angered at how he could make such a public accusation,

Ashamed of his son's paranoid anger, infuriated at how his son had disrespected the wishes of the equally grieving Higurashi family.

The Daiyoukai swayed again, feeling his entire body burn up as if in fire. But he did not care anymore, he did not mind.

 _If this is what it takes to see you again…_

 _Please, I just want to see you again,_

He fell on his knees and onto the floor, he broke down in tears. A familiar scene for him, ever since her death he would find himself in this position.

Every fucking, dragging day,

Crying as if his tears could bring her back to life,

whispering out her name in the forsaken hope that she can hear his desperate pleas wherever she was.

But she would never answer her, he would never know if she could even hear.

And he would stay this way until someone else would find him, this broken, empty shell… lying on the floor, hiding inside himself under a torrent of tears.

Pathetic. Truly pathetic.

His father tried to reassure him that everything will get better. But as the days passed by, Sesshomaru found that his Shrine Girl's absence would only worsen the empty void in his soul. And so he would pretend to exist.

But then the memory of her blue eyes, her smile,

Her broken promises,

Would pass through his mind again.

And the process of breaking would repeat,

A vicious cycle,

Every fucking, dragging day.

 _How could you just leave me like this…_

 _How cruel of you…_

 _Just leaving me alone like this…_

His vision blurred, and a tall figure hovered over him. And the Daiyoukai thought… could this be death?

 _Finally,_

His breathing quickened, and so did his heart. It spasmed abnormally fast he could not catch his breath.

And memories filled his mind, as vivid as it were yesterday.

That beautiful autumn afternoon and her first hesitant confession,

Their first kiss before the curtain of fireflies and stars,

Their first night together…

The scent of her sweat, her soft moans as she whispered to him that she loved him, over and over again, she loved him,

 _Shrine Girl…_

 _I just… want to see you again…_

He closed his eyes, welcoming death like a longtime friend.

* * *

A pain like no other. The Daiyoukai woke up to a sterile white room, the scent of bleach penetrating into his nose.

Flowers and get-well-soon balloons hovering at his bedside,

White curtains fluttering from an open window to a blue, cloudless sky.

His ribs ached, his throat burned. And his heart broke yet again, as tears spilled from his golden eyes, realizing where he was. Streaking on his cheeks, the feeling strangling at his throat. And he choked from the sobs that he could not restrain.

 _How cruel of you…_

 _Even in death, you deny me this wish…_

A team of white-robed people rushed towards him, frantically tending to his rousing form. Doctors and nurses…

But he did not care, because nothing seemed to matter anymore.

 _Nothing… is changing…_

Everything still didn't make sense, everything else was still a fucked-up blur. And he cried yet again, unable to stop, like the pathetic being that he was. And yes, he had long admitted, he was pathetic.

Without her he was pathetic.

He was nothing without her. His lover, his best friend.

His Shrine Girl.

"Kagome," he could only whisper, hiding inside himself,

His soul, dying like a single candle's flicker in the dead of the night.

 _Please help me._

 _Anyone, please… help me…_

 _I cannot move on._

 _I still miss her… I still miss her._

* * *

 _-Second Year-_

He had gained the trust of his father. And of the Hanyou and the Youkai that gravitated to him in his first year of the program. He would admit, there was some resentment whenever he looked their way, whenever he was with them.

They were the ones who found him in the school bathroom after all. They were the ones who brought him to the hospital. They probably thought they were doing him a favor, by keeping him "alive". But "alive" was barely the word to describe him now,

The days that passed by was still a cloudy, fucked-up blur. Barely comprehending, barely interacting.

The mask that he put on, the one of indifference had grown impenetrable. Reflecting emptiness, of void emotion.

But the only problem was, he was not numb.

 _They said time heals all wounds._

 _How long has it been?_

 _I don't know anymore… I lost track of time._

No one else knew that he still cried at night. That everywhere he looked there was her warm smile, that every whisper of the wind was a reminder of her laughter, and every drop of rain her vain tears.

The ache was growing deeper, rooting him into a hopeless spiral, and he had given up on finding a way out… sinking deeper and deeper into despair.

 _I want to see you again,_

Since his failed attempt in the school bathroom, his heartbroken father forcefully seized all reminder that he had of her.

He said he burned it all.

His father hounded him every minute at home. And the hanyou and his mate never left his side at school.

But today would be different.

It had been a year since his last attempt, and it seemed like they had somewhat trusted him.

He gathered his messenger bag near his person and slipped his hand inside, feeling the crumpled picture of him and his Shrine Girl in his hands…

The one she brought with her that rainy night, when she was knocking on his gate, crying out to him in confused misery, begging him for help.

It was the only memento of them that he was able to save.

His hands then reached deeper, feeling the cold weight of the concealed gun. He had fully loaded it in secrecy this morning.

 _Shrine Girl…_

 _I can't wait to see you again._

"… trying to get her pregnant." The hanyou was saying, but Sesshomaru was not able to catch all he said.

"Oh," The inuyoukai answered absently, as a warm breeze blew his way. He looked towards the direction of the cherry trees,

Momentarily lost in his memories of blue eyes and a warm, sheltering smile.

"But if I am successful, if I really do get her pregnant, it's gonna be a whole other shit show."

Sesshomaru gave him a glance. "Why is that?"

"What do you mean why is that? A female is on her most vulnerable when she is pregnant… especially with a youkai child. Staying with her is not necessary, some strict households don't even follow tradition anymore. And my Kagura can very well protect herself.

But things happen. And if it ever does, at least I'm there should things turn downhill.

I believe, Sesshomaru, that if you love your chosen one, you should never leave her side when she is on her most vulnerable.

Never."

The Inuyoukai steeled his mask of indifference as he recoiled into his own thoughts. The hanyou's mate had arrived, sparing him the task of pretending to listen. As they started their lunch, another warm wind blew their way.

He turned his head absently to the breeze, feeling it sift through his hair, imagining, in his desperate, broken mind that it was her soft little kisses,

Gently fluttering over his skin.

 _Even if it were true,_

 _And even if it weren't…_

 _I shouldn't have left your side._

 _This regret… only adds to all the reasons why I don't deserve your forgiveness…_

 _I shouldn't have left you._

 _You… and our child…_

 _Who knows… what both of you had to endure._

 _ **Images flashed in his mind,**_

 _ **of him walking away from her,**_

 _ **as her eyes dripped tears and her hands dripping blood,**_

 _ **Scratching the message she so desperately clawed for him on the wooden floor.**_

 _Will you both forgive me? Do I even deserve forgiveness? I guess I'll get to find out when I see you again…_

 _I can't wait to see you again._

A girl interrupted their lunch. She asked for his presence, and he quietly excused himself. Another confession, or was it? Maybe it was because she was blushing as she spoke. And she cried when he looked down and said he was sorry.

He didn't know anymore. He didn't care.

 _I can't wait to see you again._

He walked back towards the hanyou and his mate. The wind youkai was telling him something, but he did not hear. "Let's stop by the Sakura trees on our way." Sesshomaru absently said.

"Another reject?" The youkai said, and Sesshomaru nodded his head and picked up his belongings, relieved to find the same heavy weight as he lifted his bag,

His soul almost breaking in anticipation.

"Maybe that's what's missing, you idiot. Maybe you just need a decent fuck or something."

All else that followed was blurred from his mind. Only the thought of his Shrine Girl's smile lingered in his thoughts, only the warmth of her presence would matter. Everything else was nothing.

They walked in silence towards the rows of Sakura, its pink blossoms reminding him of the first time they met. He breathed the fragrant air from the snow of blossoms, his heart aching so bad the pressure was crippling. And he thought of her smile, her laughter,

Her blue eyes,

The Daiyoukai turned to the hanyou and his mate. He would have told them to go to class ahead, and he would have told them he wanted to stay-

Just for a few minutes.

And under the shower of petals, surrounded by a hundred and fifty years of memories of her love, he would plant a bullet in his head.

 _What a beautiful day to see you again._

Sesshomaru gathered himself to speak. But then the warm breeze suddenly brought a familiar scent, a painfully sheltering presence.

His heart raced uncontrollably,

And he turned back… to the rows of Sakura trees. And it was then that the world stopped around him, time suspended around him.

Sesshomaru held his breath. "It can't be," he barely whispered.

Underneath a fully bloomed cherry tree was his Shrine Girl,

His beautiful Kagome,

Reaching out to catch the falling petals on her hands.


	19. A Beautiful Recompense

_**A Beautiful Recompense**_

* * *

Every step was an eerie echo of their past, every blossom that fell; longing memories of a hundred and fifty years that had been. And every breath was a painful reminder of what could have been.

The moment he reached out to her, she convulsed like an invalid, her precious little body slammed hard on the ground. He was at least thankful that it was grassy earth that cushioned her fall. As he came closer, the more she grimaced in sheer torture. She grit her teeth in absolute pain, her soft whimpers cutting his heart open, raw.

It was when she looked at him that his breath was knocked away: gone was the joy that sparked in her eyes, there was no warmth in her regard.

It was as if she was seeing a stranger.

He was a stranger.

Nothing more, nothing less. And his mating mark was erased. Snuffed out in existence. He stood dumbfounded, torn between his emotions and the crippling desire to hold her, to comfort her from that debilitating pain.

But every step away seemed to ease her cries.

He took a step away, and another, and another. And his muscles protested every movement, his instincts, his mind screaming at him to go back.

And so he ran as fast as his legs could carry him, every fiber of his soul overwhelmed with a wave of emotions… he did not know when he dialed his father's number. He couldn't remember what he said, or if he was able to say anything at all. Most probably he sobbed like an idiot, where he stopped running in the corner of the sidewalk, the people around him staring.

Or maybe he didn't, because the next thing he knew he was surrounded by a group of white-haired Inuyoukai like himself – his family,

And he felt his father's hand squeeze his shoulder, and his distinctive voice as he whispered: "Son, tell me everything that you saw."

* * *

When they reached the very top of the thousand steps, a terrible ache started to constrict his throat. It was getting harder to breathe, but his father's supportive hand on his shoulder prodded him to move along.

An old Shrine Maiden was sweeping the grounds.

Sesshomaru opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out.

"Is Kyoshiro in the shrine?" His father spoke.

"He went to Shinjuku with his wife," she smiled cordially, "You are the Taishos, aren't you?" she asked with a slight blush on her cheeks. "If this is about council matters, I suggest you come back another day. They won't be back until tomorrow. But feel free to linger, the Shrine is not closed for operations."

"Sorry for the trouble," Touga bowed his head slightly, and he turned to leave, expecting his son to follow. But the younger youkai rushed past him and disappeared towards the Kagura-den. The Taisho patriarch followed closely behind. "Son?"

He entered the dusty structure, the heavy wooden doors creaking as he opened it. His footsteps echoed inside the performance hall, light streamed into the room, its golden rays hitting the ground, bouncing on the lonely walls of the long-unused space.

He found his heir on the farthest wall, hands splayed on the giant mural.

"It's beautiful," Touga said, golden eyes scanning the detailed painting of Sakura blossoms and a cloudless blue sky. "She finally finished it, huh?"

"She did," Sesshomaru answered. But there was a crack to the young daiyoukai's voice, a certain desperation that he knew all too well.

Touga turned to him. The young Inu's shoulders were slumped, and he was shaking. His son, it turned out, was trying to control his tears.

"Father," Sesshomaru asked, with sheer torture in his pleading eyes, "I'm not in the picture."

Touga stepped back, as the whole mural sank in his eyes. Sakura trees, endless blue sky, and a little girl staring up to the heavens.

Gone was the large Inu that sat beside her… always beside her, as if he was deliberately erased in the painting, disappeared in her most cherished memory.

Sesshomaru's hands clenched in restraint. "She has to remember me," Sesshomaru said, "She has to… I'm her MATE, for crying out loud!"

Touga stepped back, alarmed. His son's eyes were growing dangerously red, fangs were lengthening, "Son,"

"I'm her mate," He said, consumed like wildfire in his rage, "She has to know that. She was mine, I was hers… for a hundred and fifty years…" His demonic aura was barely being suppressed, sending chills at the back of Touga's spine,

The Patriarch backed away.

"She should remember that, right? This must have been some mistake…"

Back then, during Kagome's funeral, Sesshomaru lost control. It took the strongest of the Inuyoukai clan and the rest of the council to suppress him.

But this time it was only the two of them.

"Son," Touga tried to no avail, as Sesshomaru slowly reached out a clawed hand towards him,

"Yes," another voice drifted in the tense silence, "She is your mate. No one could contest that,"

The two spun around to the other corner of the room. Standing on the corner was a very familiar face. She smiled gently, "I'm sorry, but I couldn't help but eavesdrop." The middle-aged woman gathered the silk layers of her elaborate kimono and stepped towards them.

"I know you," Sesshomaru said, his eyes bleeding back to gold, "Where have I seen you before?"

"Such youth," the woman chuckled, "Yet your memory is clouded with the veils of time…"

A memory of their conversation in the Lantern Festival fleeted in the Daiyoukai's mind. "Midoriko," he said, and the woman nodded.

"Midoriko?" Touga said, his lips growing pale. "But isn't she the…"

She reached out to Sesshomaru, and she rested the palm of her hand on his forehead. "The creator of the Shikon Jewel." She admitted, "I have been watching… we have been watching."

She closed her eyes, and a warmth wrapped Sesshomaru's soul.

Blows of memory – Kagome's memories –

Filled Sesshomaru's mind.

And she revealed to the Inu, through Kagome's eyes,

Everything that happened.

"Is this…" he croaked, his knees giving way, and he sank into the wooden floor, drowning in his tears.

"Her last six days." She answered softly.

"I'm sorry…" he whispered, his eyes wide open as every detail of her miserable life flashed before his eyes, "I'm so sorry…"

From her being forced to drink the scalding liquid to taking back her own vomit, her pleading to him on bended knees, her encounter in the train station, her crawling to his gate, begging for help…

The image of her bloody hands scratching on the floor,

his silhouette walking away from her,

and that final encounter with her father…

as her little red energy fluttered goodbye,

and her grasping desperately at her last fleeting memory of her lover's golden eyes.

"Son," Touga stepped forward in concern. His son was curled on the floor, never blinking, tears streaming on his face. But the spirit of Midoriko held her free hand up, stopping him from intervening.

"Let's try to go further," she said gently, "Let me show you what happened… after those six days."

* * *

 _Rain, never-ending rain. But little Souta did watch the news beforehand, and he knew that there would be a storm, and the rain would last two days._

 _This was the second day, and as he expected, it wouldn't end until tomorrow._

 _He tried to gather his sore body forward, but he was just in so much pain. His father threw him out of the door, breaking the shoji, breaking his ribs and shoulder. He landed on the hard stone ground, to the Haiden that was directly outside of the offertory hall._

 _In between the sound of the rain, pounding in his ears, and the rush of blood in his head, he could still hear his mother's cries, his father's enraged screaming,_

 _And Kagome nee-san's begging._

 _And he heard silence._

 _It was a very long silence… until the sound of the doors slammed again._

 _It was probably over. He waited, and waited a little bit more. There was no warmth of his mother, no concerned fussing of his older sister._

" _Please, if you are watching over us… if you can hear me…" he whispered, with all his heart and soul, "I know you can hear me. Keep her safe… wherever she is… keep her safe._

 _My nee-san…_

 _Keep her safe."_

 _He wanted to cry out, but he was afraid that his nee-san might hear. She had been through so much, worrying about him was the last thing he wanted her to do._

 _Little Souta felt funny, his hands and lips were tingling. He could see a curious pool of red spread around his broken body. And no matter how he tried to move he couldn't… he closed his eyes, somehow, he felt sleepy… very sleepy._

 _In his fading vision, he could see someone walking towards him._

 _And the unfamiliar figure knelt before him, "Of course we saw everything," she gathered him in her embrace, "And yes, we can hear you." She rested his head on her chest, "Sleep, child. You don't deserve such memories…_

 _And your nee-san… we will keep her safe. I promise you myself, she will be safe."_

 _Little Souta finally allowed himself to surrender to the unusual drowsiness._

* * *

" _Where am I?" Kagome said._

 _It was surreal, hovering between life and death. She could see her lifeless body on the cold tatami floor, yet she could feel herself floating. It was a wonderful feeling… free of any pain and heartache. Yet it was terrifying… it was as if there was a very thin string that anchored her to the present…_

 _She saw a hazy light not far from her._

 _She felt as if she would disappear at any moment._

" _Here and now, then and there," said a voice, and Kagome looked behind her._

" _That is… " Kagome said, and the woman nodded. Then the Shrine Girl's eyes widened in recognition. "You are…"_

" _Midoriko." She bowed down._

 _Kagome blushed, getting down on her knees and scrambling to prostrate herself, "The Shikon Jewel," she stuck her face on the ground. "I'm sorry, Midoriko-sama… my name is—"_

" _I know who you are, Kagome-chan. I've been with you… every second, since the day you were born."_

" _Eh?" Her blush grew heavier, as memories of her and her white Inu filled her mind, and all the mischevious things that they did, "Really? Uhh, Like… 'every' second?"_

 _The woman laughed. "Yes."_

" _Oh," she trailed off, unable to control the raging blush on her cheeks, "I'm… I…"_

" _There's no need to be embarrassed._

 _Kagome-chan… is a special gift, after all."_

" _Special?" The shrine girl looked at her._

 _Midoriko nodded her head. "Kagome-chan is special to me. Very, very special." She reached out and wrapped her in her warm embrace. And they stayed that way for long moments, not minding the time._

" _A very special gift," Midoriko said softly, "Exploited by outside elements… I'm sorry…"_

 _Kagome then remembered, she finally remembered everything else that happened. And a certain sadness came over her._

" _Don't be. It's not your fault." She closed her eyes, "It's not anyone's fault."_

 _Silence._

" _You do not detest your father for doing what he did?"_

 _The Shrine Girl shook her head. "In his mind… he was doing what was best for the family."_

 _Midoriko pulled away, her eyes wide in genuine surprise. She wiped the tears on Kagome's cheeks, "Do you detest your mother?"_

" _I couldn't blame her… she was crippled from her fear."_

" _How about… your White Inu?"_

 _Kagome looked at her and smiled. "How could I? He saturated my skies with so much color, he filled my soul with so much emotion that even the wind sings my happiness. He was the reason why my life was beautiful… No, I could never detest him." Kagome's eyes then deepened in hue, "And I am sad… that I have to leave it all behind."_

 _The woman gave her a reassuring nod as she pulled away._

" _If you don't mind… Midoriko-sama, before I go, can I make one last prayer?" Kagome turned to face the Prayer Hall by the broken Shoji door, and she closed her eyes. "This last prayer…" The Shrine Girl whispered, "Is for my white-haired, golden-eyed Inu."_

 _Midoriko could only smile. For a hundred and fifty years, her prayer was—_

 _She reached out, and she held the girl's hands._

 _Kagome squeezed back. "I pray that the Kamis keep him safe from harm, that they lift his spirits whenever he finds himself discouraged." They held each other's hands tighter, not bothering to wipe the tears that were inevitable on the girl's cheeks,_

" _I thank you… for giving me the chance to get to know him in this lifetime. I wish that I may get to know him in the next… and all other lifetimes that will follow." The girl whimpered softly, filling a long stretch of silence with her sobs. "But if there is no other life after this…" she whispered, "If this was my last… then I pray for his happiness._

 _Kami, I pray that you give him someone whom he will love more than me, and someone who loves him more than I…I pray that he bears many, many offspring, that his proud lineage be continued,_

 _I pray that his skies continue to be beautiful… and he would never be consumed by the past that he had with me…. he would continue to move forward and fill his life with love._

 _I pray that when he looks back, there would only be a fleeting memory of a Shrine Girl that loved him with all her heart."_

 _Kagome opened her eyes. Midoriko had cried, too. The Shrine Girl let out an exhausted breath when the hazy light before them flickered._

" _I think I have to go."_

" _Wait," her elder said, pulling her from her grasp. Kagome looked back, confused._

" _Remember when I said… that Kagome-chan is very, very special to me? Remember when I said that she is a very special gift?" Midoriko held her hands tight, "I dedicated my whole being to the war… down to my last breath."_

 _Kagome tilted her head, utterly confused,_

" _The Kamis took pity and decided to reward me with another life," Midoriko continued,_

" _One that is filled with family, and beauty and love…" She leaned over, "Kagome-chan is different from all the other guardians, you see, she is much more special than that." She whispered, ever so softly,_

" _Because Kagome-chan is my reincarnation._

 _She is supposed to be my second lifetime."_

 _The Shrine Girl stood quiet, stunned._

" _My soul and yours, they're one and the same. And the Kamis… they won't allow anyone else to take this wonderful gift away from me." Midoriko wrapped her in a tight embrace,_

 _"This beautiful gift,_

 _That I cherish… with all my weary soul…"_

 _Kagome felt herself slowly fading, as Midoriko's soul quietly melted into her own._

* * *

"Anna and Souta recovered from their injuries, but the Higurashi's ancestors- my past guardians- made sure the little boy had no memory of what happened.

He shouldn't remember a thing, it would scar him for life if he did."

Touga tried to reel in his growing anger. "Why did Kyoshiro lie to us? If Kagome lived after that night, why go through such lengths, he even held a mock funeral,"

"We do not know his reasons, but we are watching. We gave him one last warning… that if he interfered with my life, _Kagome's_ life again… a definite judgment will be served.

Not by us, for who are we but mere spirits of what had been,

But by the Kami, who holds our life from beginning to end."

"I can't go near her," Sesshomaru said, "She falls into this terrible torture when I am close,"

"Her body still has the remnants of Kyoshiro's exorcism spell. Your energy, specifically, will be rejected violently. You have to keep your distance from her until she has fully detoxified."

"How will I know if she is ready?" his voice cracked again, the utter torture numbing his body.

"When she can come to you without any rejection."

"Her memory… will she… remember me?"

Midoriko remained silent for quite a while. "The matters of the spirit… they are different. The body can heal… but the soul is difficult to mend. I'm sorry, Sesshomaru. That is beyond my knowledge."

"It doesn't matter," Sesshomaru finally said. The warmth of her proximity strongly reminded him of his Shrine Girl's, and a renewed courage filled the empty void that once gaped in his soul. "If she remembers or not…As long as she is here. I will have her back by my side,

Whatever it takes."

Midoriko nodded, and she bowed down. "Thank you… And Sesshomaru-kun?"

The young daiyoukai's eyes met hers.

"Whatever happens, this time… don't let her go."

The wooden doors fully opened, spilling sunlight into the room. The old Shrine Maiden stepped inside, and seeing them by the murals, she stepped back in frantic apology. "I'm sorry, I was going to clean this area here. I'll come back later." She quietly exited, leaving the two Inus behind.

Two, because the Lady Midoriko had disappeared,

As if she were never there.

Sesshomaru reached out to the smooth painting of the little girl who was staring up at the blue sky, and he splayed his hands, running it gently, lovingly on her outline.

"I have to tell our clan," Touga said, standing up in urgency, "And I have to report Kyoshiro's heinous deeds to the council."

Sesshomaru merely nodded, his gaze still on little Kagome's image. Touga walked out of the Kagura-den, and the young daiyoukai rested his head on her finished mural.

"Kagome," he whispered, "Whatever happens,

This time,

I'm not letting go. "


	20. Under the Same Blue Sky

**_A/N:_** Short epilogue to follow tomorrow, to wrap it all up. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to share this story. It's been a blast. :)

* * *

 ** _Under the Same Blue Sky_**

* * *

 ** _-Present Time-_**

 ** _*_** _I'm not letting go…*_

"Sesshomaru," the voice message blared inside the empty mansion. "Are you home?" It echoed through the motionless dwelling, bounced against the cold marble walls.

* _Even if I have to go through everything you did, I'll never let go….*_

"Sesshomaru, please answer. We can't reach you on the phone… can't contact Kagome either. The whole clan is worried.

I'm worried.

Call me, son. As soon as possible."

 _*You fought for us until your hands bled, you hoped until all hope was exhausted._

 _I'm not letting go…._

 _Because you never did._

 _Until your last breath.*_

The golden-eyed Inu woke up that morning, highly elated, his soul, euphoric on what was to come.

Today was the day.

In a morning that was not quite like any other, he was awakened not by the gentle prodding of the morning sun, but by the sound of the pounding rain. He stretched out of bed, tried to ease the nervous tension in his muscles. He barely slept last night, he couldn't get the sound of her voice off his mind when she said goodnight.

There was something in her voice that unnerved him, something in that simple regard that alarmed his instincts.

When he tried to call her, when he tried to find her, he realized he was right.

He would find himself seated inside a train, bound to a place that had become a part of him throughout his hundreds of years of existence. Soaked to the bone, eyes bloodshot and raw from all his crying, his very soul, overwhelmed from the crushing pain.

He couldn't find her.

Today was the sixth day since she promised to be his mate. Summer solstice, just like the day she gave her body to him, and her heart, completely to him, with her promise that she would love him forever, until her very last breath.

"Young man, are you alright?" the old lady beside him asked.

He could only lift his weary eyes at her, and cast it back down.

His phone wouldn't stop ringing. His father had been trying to contact him the whole morning.

The phone rang again… he finally pressed the power button, effectively shutting it off.

"Young man?"

The signs were blatant. Her distance was stabbing at him, knives carving deeper and deeper in his chest. And she knew it, and it seemed as if she loved every minute of it, driving the knife deeper until it reached its limit.

Then it would shatter into pieces inside of him.

"I will be," he finally answered, "As long as she'll be by my side again." The train halted to a stop. He looked at the sign, "Bunkyo", it read. He gathered his disheveled form and stood as the doors opened, and walked out into the pouring rain.

* * *

 _"_ _What if I told you that we met before, and you promised me you'd love me until your last breath?"_

 _"_ _Then I would say you're crazy."_

Flashes of their time together filled her mind- of a golden afternoon where the maple fell like rain- where a little girl, slightly embarrassed and a little annoyed, confessed her undying love to a stubborn white-haired inu. He only laughed at her and walked away in vain.

 _"_ _What if I told you that I loved you... and still love you,_

 _and I'll do anything just to call you mine again?"_

 _"_ _Senpai," she looked at him, "Surely you would be aware by now, that I'm never gonna believe anything that you say?"_

It puzzled her to no end. His tears when he held her so tight on the train, the unnecessary, absurd displays of his affection whenever people were around,

The excessive whispers of "I love you", uttered so suddenly out of the blue.

 _"I will love you until my bones grow brittle, I will love you until my last breath. If in this life we end up losing each other, I will find you in the next… "_

She looked around her, at the photographs scattered all around her, like the memories fluttering back into her consciousness. Kagome slowly brought her hands to her face, and she wiped the tears on her cheeks. Tears she didn't even realize was there.

She knelt down and pushed the photos aside, and she ran her hands on the deep etch on her wooden floor- her last message to Sesshomaru- carved by her bloodied hands and longing tears.

She touched her womb, reminiscing the memory of the little red energy that once fluttered about.

 _"And then I will love you more, until my soul exhausts, until I am but a remnant of this fleeting world."_

The blue-eyed shrine girl suddenly stood, and she looked out the window. Torrents of emotions, much like the cruel rain, fell in her mind, trickling into her soul. Cleansing…drowning,

Prayers for his safety in the quiet afternoons,

Flutters in her stomach whenever he called her name,

And heartbreak, so much heartbreak.

The sky was dark, the rain was pouring. Such was a morning like no other.

She suddenly dashed to her little bedside drawer. The girl rummaged madly, until her hands felt a familiar sensation, one that she could recognize, even with her eyes closed.

A silken case, containing broken brushes. And just below the drawer were vats of paint… saved by her deceased mother- her heart suddenly ached, when there was a little note scribbled on the side:

 _"I love you, my daughter. You deserve to be happy…_

 _I love you."_

Nightmares of her mother and father had haunted her at one point: she had dreamed of them driving at a cliffside road, on their way to Shinjuku, engaged in a violent argument inside the car. Her father was yelling, screaming to her mother- he will take her away, farther away from the "golden-eyed demon", and he would do anything to keep the lineage clean, even if he would kill her all over again.

And in her dreams, her mother, with tears in her eyes and a whispered "I'm sorry," jumped out of her seat and grabbed the wheel from him,

Spinning the car out of control,

Plunging them into a rocky, gruesome fate a hundred feet below.

"Mama," Kagome whispered, clutching the note close to her heart. Then she breathed deep, and she gathered her brushes, gathered herself, and she picked out only two bottles of colors- only two out of the twelve- because that was what she needed,

The only colors that she needed,

And she ran out of her room, down the creaking wooden mansion she once called her home for the past hundred and fifty years. She ran and ran, ignoring the burst of cold wind that greeted her when she found herself outside, the slush of wet earth underneath her feet,

The pouring rain on her shoulders, prickling like needles on her exhausted skin.

She didn't realize she had pushed heavy wooden doors to enter her destination. She didn't know she opened just one window, creating an eerie dim into the structure that was once filled with light.

The only light she needed was there, she only needed enough to do what she had meant to do.

And she stood before the giant wall, and she took her broken brush and dipped it into the vat of white ink…

She took the brush and started to paint,

The feeling oh so familiar in her hands.

* * *

 _*I can hear you, your cries echo into the drained chambers of my soul…*_

 ** _"Then why don't you let me out?"_**

* _I want to… god, I want to. I want a reprieve from all this pain._

 _And I'm exhausted…_

 _Chasing, constantly chasing her… this never-ending chase…"_

 ** _"Let me find her for you."_**

 _*The last time I let you out, it only ended in heartbreak.*_

He remembered the night of the stupid party.

He remembered himself seeing her in the arms of that wolf youkai and blacking out, and the next thing he knew, she was bloody and crying in his arms.

And he remembered that little girl who looked like five years old, professing her undying love for him under the shower of golden maple leaves, the same girl he kissed underneath a million stars…

Sesshomaru paused, and he looked up at the gloomy, raincloud-riddled heavens.

 _*The sky… it gives me comfort… to know that Kagome and I… are underneath one sky.*_

His beast fell silent, and they stayed that way for a long while, waiting for nothing, hoping for everything.

 ** _"We are,"_** his beast finally said, **_"And that won't change this time. We will love her until our bones grow brittle, we will love her until our last breath. If in this life we end up losing each her, we will find her in the next…"_**

His clamped jaw relaxed, he loosened his fisted hand. He closed his eyes, and he allowed himself to breathe.

 ** _"And then we will love her more, until our soul exhausts, until we are but a remnant of this fleeting world."_**

Sesshomaru opened his eyes. Golden and scarlet had harmonized into one, just as he and his beast were one and the same. He breathed out, and a rush of steady energy flowed out, swallowing him in a field of red youki.

The smoke then cleared, the youki stabilized.

Underneath the rain stood a beautiful white dog with magenta markings, golden-red eyes fixated towards the sky. For a while it pondered, of distant memories of a blue summer sky and a familiar voice calling his name.

 _~~"Ah, I wish I could fly too!" she turned to him, blue eyes full and expecting._

 _He sighed. "I will have that ability when I reach a hundred and fifty. If you are patient I can take you with me-"~~_

There was a harsh rush of the wind, and the white inu tore its gaze from the dark heavens. It tossed its head towards the other direction, trying to sense something,

Trying to reach _her_.

He couldn't count the many times he cried,

Since she was gone,

Since he had found her.

And he was exhausted, so very exhausted.

But she was, more so than him, and what she had gone through was nothing he could ever imagine. And so the weary fire in his soul grew, it grew until it was a full blaze. Strength surged into his muscles, it filled his bones.

The white inu sprinted away, deeper into the uncertainty of the pouring rain.

* * *

Before the giant mural she had never really finished in the sakura-den, Kagome stepped back, watching the beams of dim light hit the entirety of her work. Her hands were a mess of white paint, and she felt a tickle on her skin,

She was crying again, but it didn't really matter.

Kagome brought her hands to her face in attempts to wipe her tears, it only left a white streak on her cheek.

Then the crying Miko dipped her brush into her little vat of gold. She reached out, and she put in her final strokes.

Brush and golden paint fell from her hands, crashing on the wooden floor. The blue-eyed shrine girl reeled back, too much overwhelmed with emotion, and she buried her paint-smeared hands on her face and sobbed.

What to do now?

Now that she remembered everything?

The large wooden doors suddenly burst open behind her, and she spun around, blue eyes wide and startled.

By the doorway, drenched from the rain was the miserable form of a most familiar inu, golden-red eyes trained intently at her.

And at that very moment, she had her answer

from the question that so stalled her mind.

* * *

He rushed to her, morphing back into human form, seizing her wrists and baring his fangs. The strength of his tackle was too powerful he slammed her to the ground, pinning her with the weight of his body and the fall of his frustrated tears.

"You're leaving me again!" He screamed at her, his throat hoarse and raw, "You're leaving me again…you promised me you'd stay!"

His shoulders shook, his body shuddered. And he trembled, out of anger, out of frustration, but most of all, out of fear.

"You promised me forever," he broke down, "How could you leave me again… after you promised me…"

Pathetic.

Utterly pathetic.

Just like the long nights alone, curled up on the floor before the television as videos of their yuinou played,

calling out her name as he held on to the only picture of them left in desperate longing,

standing alone under the sakura tree, staring at the impossibly blue sky which was so very like the color of her eyes….

"You're not leaving me again," He whimpered, "I'm not losing you again…

not again… please,

not again…"

The exhausted inu looked at her, she was looking back at him with those blue eyes, keeping silent, muted,

As muted as how she probably felt towards him.

But her tears that were not stopping sparked a little hope in his heart. Could she at least consider? Will she, at least, listen?

He never took his eyes off her, his tears were shamelessly falling on her face. But he didn't care, gods, he didn't care. She was listening, and this was the only chance he probably had. "I'm sorry for what happened,

I'm sorry I didn't fight for our little one.

So many things I want to ask forgiveness for… and I don't deserve you, I know I don't deserve you…" He buried his face on her neck, "But I love you, and I try to envision myself giving way for you to move on. But I can't… I just can't.

I was going to court you again, it didn't matter if your memories never came back. But then that stupid party happened,"

She remained quiet, she laid still. Never moving, never reacting.

"It's so difficult," he sobbed, "So fucking frustrating, whenever you look at me with hatred in your eyes,

And I look at you,

And all I can remember is the hundred and fifty years we shared together."

He squeezed the flesh on her arms, so hard her knuckles turned white, still no response. Only her blue eyes were looking back at him, drowned in silent tears.

"I can't blame you for walking away from me, but just know that I will find you. I'll find you and I'll bring you back to my side where you truly belong.

And I won't care if you hate me, every fiber of me, every minute that we're together.

I'm not losing you again," he cried,

"You fucking hear that? I don't care if you hate me.

But I'm not losing you again, Kagome."

He shook, crying his heart out like a lost little child. The girl underneath him remained still. She will probably push him away. Curse at him, or maybe throw him a seething glance. Sesshomaru braced himself for the rejection that was to come. It had been that way for the past few days with her, after all. But he was prepared to face the consequence of his selfishness, he only needed her by his side.

Forever by his side.

Just as she promised.

The shrine girl shifted from underneath him. He buried his face on her neck, her hair, wrapped her desperately in his arms, knowing what was to come. He refused to let go, didn't she hear what he said?

His heart was beating so loud, her own heart was beating in synch with his. What was she thinking? What was making her heart beat as fast as his?

Fear? Hatred?

Then she breathed out, probably in exhaustion, and her heart was suddenly this calm, resolute steady that made his heartache in longing for the many nights they were together, naked and wrapped in each other's arms.

"I heard you," she softly said, "And I'm not walking away, Sesshomaru-sama,"

He stiffened, he pulled away in astonishment. He looked into her impossibly blue eyes and wept:

She was looking at him with such warmth it made it so hard for him to breathe.

"I'm not walking away," she continued, "And if I am ever going somewhere, I'm taking you with me. I'll love you until my last breath, didn't I promise? Until my soul exhausts,

until I am but a remnant of this fleeting world."

He pulled slightly away and he finally brought his gaze up, to the large mural before them, to where the filtered dim light of the sun hit.

Beside the painting of the little girl watching the clouds on the clear blue sky,

Was a white inu with golden eyes, sitting beside her, close beside her…

"Kagome," was all he could say.

"I remember everything, Sesshomaru-sama," she whispered. Kagome held her mate's exhausted face. He looked at her, robbed of speech and stunned out of breath.

She smiled amid her tears. "I'm here now, and you are too."

The daiyoukai sighed in disbelief, still so very utterly stunned. He threw his arms around her, unable to believe, so fucking confused and elated and fearful,

Was this all a play of cruel fate?

Or did she finally, truly remember?

"Kagome," he cried out, "Kagome…" He did not know how many times he uttered her name. His mind was a whirl of emotions and memories and disbelief. Sesshomaru held her tight, afraid that the moment would disappear, afraid that it was all a cruel dream.

But the shrine girl's soft lips kissed him,

She kissed him, and he tasted the sweetness of her lips and the salt of her tears. He sighed,

It was real… this was real!

He leaned down and received her yearning, responded to her lips he caught her with his own. And the kiss deepened, sighs and whispers of longing and regret and happiness poured into the torrid contact. He pushed her robes off, she tugged his drenched hakama down.

The feel of familiar warm skin,

The tickle of silky hair…

And life-giving breath, as their souls rejoiced in the beat of each other's hearts.

 _"Anata,"_ The shrine girl whispered in between kisses _,_ "I'm here now. We're going to be alright."


End file.
